New Grad Feeling Hopeless

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Specializes in Med-Surg RN.

Hi, I'm a new grad. I passed NCLEX in September and got my first RN job with my BSN in November. I worked as a Med Surg RN in orientation at a small community hospital for 8 weeks, but was let go in early January due to failure to progress adequately through orientation. I was very overwhelmed when managing care for more than 3 patients at a time and became panicked and emotional frequently. I have been struggling with moderate to severe depression over the past 2 years, anxiety, panic attacks, and was recently diagnosed with ADD. I have been treated with medications and therapy with little to no success. Even through nursing school, I struggled to manage and had to retake coursework and clinicals. I've been advised by my former supervisor to avoid taking a position within an inpatient hospital setting right now, as she feels it's not right for me. I'm left wondering if I can succeed in nursing at all though. My mental health has me feeling physically ill some days and I just don't feel like myself and the nurse I want to be. It is so frustrating. Some people have suggested office settings or nursing homes, which I am open to but I also feel like I want to build my skills as a new grad and I want to feel excited about what I'm doing. I feel like my patients deserve more than I have to give and it is so sad that I feel like I can't be the nurse I want to be. I'm left wondering what I should do. As a side note, I don't drive either due to anxiety and a number of other factors, which limits the jobs I can take. I'm sorry for the lengthy post. Thank you if you took the time to read. I hope any response will be kind.❤️

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Specializes in NICU.
On 1/30/2022 at 10:29 AM, SNgirl21 said:

Some people have suggested office settings or nursing homes, which I am open to but I also feel like I want to build my skills as a new grad and I want to feel excited about what I'm doing

Look at your response,pick one and only one.Either you deal with the stress  and live to be a nurse another year OR you put yourself in trial by fire trying to acquire NEW skills,.....You havent even used all your nursing school skills yet ,so why stress looking for new ones???

There are less taxing jobs that pay a living wage, try  you will not regret it,and you will stay out of trouble by making a serious mistake at a high demand area.

Best of luck to you.

 

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Hey girl, I'm so sorry. It sounds like you are struggling a lot. Nursing is a hard job on your mental health as it is. I want to preface by saying I am not a nurse. I'm six months from graduating nursing school and I've worked in demanding health care jobs for 5 years (dialysis tech for 3, ICU/medsurg/tele tech for 2). I've also struggled with anxiety that I got somewhat under control now. Here is what I would do if I were you. Focus on yourself. You are sick and you need to get better. Make that your priority number one. Like I said, nursing is already hard on your mental health as it is. It's just going to destroy you if you add that to your already existing anxiety and depression. I'm not saying you can't be a nurse. Not at all. But you need to get your mental health under control to the point you can function and not make it worse.

Change your meds, CBT, talk therapy, meditation, whatever works for you. A combination of meds,  CBT and meditation is what worked for me. I've stopped taking the meds now, and I'm still doing fine.  Do I struggle? Yes. But I function. You are clearly struggling and there is help. Our society has gone into a "accept mental health" craze and people act like that's all you gotta do. You know how they say "depression is a disease, you wouldn't tell someone with a heart problem to just get over it or think positively" well you wouldn't tell them to just accept it and talk about it and not do anything to treat it either. You don't have to just sit with your anxiety. You can try to treat it too. And if you are already treating it and it's not getting any better, change what you are doing. I know it's hard because when you have depression you don't want to do anything, but believe me it can get better. 

Getting yourself to where you can function should be number one right now. In the meantime find an easy nursing job, part time even if need be. You can always build your skills slowly. It's not a competition. School nurse maybe? A doctor's office? PACU? Nursing home? Once you feel better and more confident move on to something a little more challenging, or don't. Sometimes we just need to accept our limitations and make the best out of it. 

I know it's hard to see your peers go into the traditional challenging nursing jobs like ICU, ER, MEDSURG, but it doesn't have to be that way for everyone. " That is not all nursing is. You are as much of a nurse as a school nurse or as an ER nurse. Don't let anyone make you feel worse if you are not following the traditional path. You are unique and so should be your trajectory. Understand your needs and move forward based on how you roll. And look you already made it through nursing school, girl, you can do this. 

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Specializes in oncology.
On 1/30/2022 at 9:29 AM, SNgirl21 said:

I've been advised by my former supervisor to avoid taking a position within an inpatient hospital setting right now, as she feels it's not right for me. I'm left wondering if I can succeed in nursing at all though. My mental health has me feeling physically ill some days and I just don't feel like myself and the nurse I want to be. It is so frustrating

Your former supervisor does not know what you are capable of, maybe they thought well. But you can and will succeed. It is just finding the job you can flourish on.  Take time to appreciate all that you have accomplished already that many cannot. Best wishes as you find your best job!

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Specializes in Med-Surg RN.

Thank you Leader25, LittleCa, and londonflo! After a little time off from things I'm applying for jobs again. I'm considering my choice of where to work carefully, but I feel I am doing well enough to get back to nursing.❤

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Specializes in Education.

Yes, this is a tough situation on both sides. Nursing is a stressful job and any pre-existing condition that affects mental health can further aggravate the stress. I have seen students who were admitted with anxiety and mental health issues, drop out as a result of the stress that is associated with just being a  student. Interacting with patients in such states is also a risk to both parties. Consider less high stress and acute care for patients. I wish you all the best. 

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Specializes in Surgical Specialty Clinic - Ambulatory Care.

Well if hospitals mandated ratios according to the ANA recommendations, you would have been close. The ANA recommends a 4 to 1 ratio on a med/surg unit, but that is rarely the ratio hospitals use. 
My advice would be to work nights. I know that can mess with your health in other ways, but nights are usually easier. Also I would see if you could find part time floor work so that you can have a longer recovery between shifts. 
Maybe consider a rehab unit? Or a mental health/psychiatric unit? Those are challenging too, but in a different way than Med/Surg so it might be better for you. Mental health nursing is in high demand so that maybe a really good career move. Good luck!

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