First of all, I want to state that I am not writing this to "poo poo" upon the nursing profession. I am hoping that by sharing my story:
A. I will feel better for having vented
B. I will maybe get some constructive feedback
C. Have a chuckle or two in the process
D. Maybe some of you will treat your new grad RN's better
I am a very type A, motivated person . I graduated near the top of my BSN class (I was class President) in May 2008 and was accepted to a prestigious MSN program in the same month. At that time, I had several offers but I accepted a new grad RN position in a CVICU. During my interview I felt I asked all the right questions (turnover rates, ratios, floating, etc.). I started my nursing career with a bright and positive outlook.
Flash forward to three months later. I just quit the hell hole. After working there for two weeks I found out the TRUTH...outcomes were the worst in the city for cardiac and stoke, new grad turnover rates were the highest, and I realized that their "culture of loving care" was just bs lip-service. I found out after I started that the cardiologist left, so I was seeing tele overflow patients ALL the time (wow, so not CVICU - and I turned down ACTUAL CVICU's for this job) and that it was all PAPER charting. There is a bs "PBDS" system that doesn't help the new graduate whatsoever. I sit there and take a four hour exam based off of videos of "clinical vignettes" and have someone critique me for two hours. Then I get back a card with ambiguous "concepts" to work on like "managment of care" and "sense of urgency". Excuse me, but I would argue that the seasoned nurse could always improve on these facets of nursing as we are always learning in this profession.
My first preceptor was a nice person. A former unit educator she was very well connected in the organization = politics gallore. All she did was tell me personal unprofessional stories about having sex with her internet boyfriend and how her soon to be ex-husband's love child baby mamma was causing drama. She spent all day on her PDA instant messaging him and put me into dangerous independent practice situations. One time she walked in on me in the process of changing tubing - huffed and puffed and told my nursing manager I had "exposed my patient's PIV to air and knowingly contaminated the system" BS!!!! What a crock!!! She later half-apologized when she realized I was indeed changing the tubing. Then she goes behind my back and tells my manager that I don't take initiative!!! *** she is a horrible PRECEPTOR and I am not going to lose my license because she is lazy. What makes me laugh the most is that she was a former EDUCATOR??? So I ask for a different preceptor --- what a joke process. Administration made such a big deal out of this and after several meetings later I had a new preceptor. The new girl was better but I was already at a disadvantage because she didn't really know where I was "at" and my manager didn't want me starting from scratch. Plus she was friends with my previous preceptor --- politics, blah blah.
NO TECHS here (grr)!!! I felt like the unit tech. The uncompetent new grad who "should be in med/surg her first year" - all I did was blood sugar, turning, oral care, baths, and gave po meds. If I was lucky I could titrate insulin. They sure didn't like it when I read their "ventilator pathway" and it stated to provide oral care q6...JELLO ever heard of VAP?...I got lectured about providing oral care q2 (i.e. waste of time/bad time management). Their equipment was so outdated and OLD I'd never seen pumps like this before and their philosophy on "back priming" makes me want to puke. Also, their "chart by exception" rule makes me nauseus. Yes nursing notes can be excessive but the rule of CYOB applies also. I had five "preceptors" tell me to "chart" differently. I can go on forever.
The thing that gets me the most is that I was humble, always on time, "fake" positive all the time after things started going bad, and went OUT OF MY WAY (even changing my schedule to DAYS). Why do nurses have a culture of "eat their young"? I worked so hard to put myself through school. I thought I went through "hazing" as a student, but I would venture to say new grads get treated WORSE than students.
So here I am. I think I need some sort of SSRI. I'm depressed, wondering if I went to school for the right thing, and wondering if I will ever find a good nursing job.
I don't know what else to say at this point. Thanks for reading!
Specializes in Med-Surg, Tele, Peri-op, Home health.
I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one feeling this way. I am at the point I don't know what to do anymore. After my 9 days with a preceptor as a new grad I was on my own. This is a very busy med-surg tele floor. It's been a month now. The last time I worked I had 7 patients. Two patients were total care. 5 were diabetic with AC/HS checks and most on standing insulin orders on top of sliding scale, 5 on IV fluids or meds. One discharge with none of the paperwork done and he was sitting in bed at 10 am with his clothes on ready to go. I cried that day.
Alot of the people I was in orientation with are unhappy. Some have already left. As for me, I am having nightmares, I have starting sleepwalking; never did THAT before! I woke up once standing in my bedroom trying to hook up my radio as an IV pump. Can you say stressed out?
Seriously though. What do I do? I am a new grad with one month experience? Who would want me? And I sure won't be applying for any med surg jobs!! Any advice would be greatly appreciated!
I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one feeling this way. I am at the point I don't know what to do anymore. After my 9 days with a preceptor as a new grad I was on my own. This is a very busy med-surg tele floor. It's been a month now. The last time I worked I had 7 patients. Two patients were total care. 5 were diabetic with AC/HS checks and most on standing insulin orders on top of sliding scale, 5 on IV fluids or meds. One discharge with none of the paperwork done and he was sitting in bed at 10 am with his clothes on ready to go. I cried that day.
Alot of the people I was in orientation with are unhappy. Some have already left. As for me, I am having nightmares, I have starting sleepwalking; never did THAT before! I woke up once standing in my bedroom trying to hook up my radio as an IV pump. Can you say stressed out?
Seriously though. What do I do? I am a new grad with one month experience? Who would want me? And I sure won't be applying for any med surg jobs!! Any advice would be greatly appreciated!
New Grad RN
Why are we left on our own so soon??? On my first day of orientation in the ER...I was in trauma and left alone when my preceptor went on break...How crazy is this? I was so scared...giving fentanyl every 30 minutes...assessing my MI patient, and assessing my other patient for any compartment syndrome...Its only my first week and I already have two patients in the ER...but at the end of the day because of admitting and transferring patients I end up having 6 or 7 patients... Its like some preceptors dont care...They want you to come to them and arent willing to guide you!!! And to those preceptors that do welcome us and always ask us "if we are doing okay" I want to thank you...you guys allow us to grow by sharing your wisdom with us...
when I leave work I tell myself that I know I have done the best I can...if i dont know something I go home and look it up...and now I know....:)
Why are we left on our own so soon??? On my first day of orientation in the ER...I was in trauma and left alone when my preceptor went on break...How crazy is this? I was so scared...giving fentanyl every 30 minutes...assessing my MI patient, and assessing my other patient for any compartment syndrome... Its like some preceptors dont care...They want you to come to them and arent willing to guide you!!! Its only my first week and I already have two patients in the ER...but at the end of the day because of admitting and transferring patients I end up having 6 or 7 patients...when I leave work I tell myself that I know I have done the best I can...if i dont know something I go home and look it up...and now I know....:)
:yeah:I tell myself to do the best that I can, if I do not know something, I can go home and look it up!!! Live the rest of your life like that, and you will be fine.:heartbeat
Did you have any clinical experience prior to going to school to earn your BSN? From your comments, it sounds as if you may have not had any before you got into school, otherwise you would have understood what the environment is like in the real world. The concerns you are describing and their tone are indicative of a more theory based and minimal clinically based education. It's great that you were class President in undergrad and that you were accepted to a prestigious MSN program. I hope you had enough emotional intelligence to not laude these over the heads of your peer nurses. They are the ones who have had the real training and survival skills doing the job everyday under difficult conditions whiere you obvously have issues and a lack of respect for their capabilities.
What have you learned from the on the job experience you have had so far? How much glass did you break when you escalated and demanded a new preceptor? Perhaps you need to change your attitude, humble yourself(you may believe you were humble but you probably communicated your inflated sense of your capabilities in other ways to the other nurses) and realize your real education started the first day of your real job as an RN. Your statement denegrating new nurses who spend there first year in med/surg illustrates the core of your problem . As a new grad, you start at the bottom and hopefully learn something over time. You have a lot to learn about your profession and some issues with maturity. Your fellow nurses are a lot more intelligent than you think and can sense your real perception and attitude toward them. It sounds as if you need to learn how to have genuine respect for them, realize you have a lot to learn about the politics (which are the same in any job in any profession) and do some sole searching to understand if the clinical enviroment is the right place for you. Maybe you should do your two years in a lowly med/surg unit and then go back to get your MSN full-time and teach. The educational environment may be where you are most comfortable and you can deal in theory and not people and reality. In that setting your academic record will be praised. On the floor, you are a just another new grad with minimal people skills and a lot to learn whether you believe that or not. Good Luck.
Did you have any clinical experience prior to going to school to earn your BSN? From your comments, it sounds as if you may have not had any before you got into school, otherwise you would have understood what the environment is like in the real world. The concerns you are describing and their tone are indicative of a more theory based and minimal clinically based education. It's great that you were class President in undergrad and that you were accepted to a prestigious MSN program. I hope you had enough emotional intelligence to not laude these over the heads of your peer nurses. They are the ones who have had the real training and survival skills doing the job everyday under difficult conditions whiere you obvously have issues and a lack of respect for their capabilities.
What have you learned from the on the job experience you have had so far? How much glass did you break when you escalated and demanded a new preceptor? Perhaps you need to change your attitude, humble yourself(you may believe you were humble but you probably communicated your inflated sense of your capabilities in other ways to the other nurses) and realize your real education started the first day of your real job as an RN. Your statement denegrating new nurses who spend there first year in med/surg illustrates the core of your problem . As a new grad, you start at the bottom and hopefully learn something over time. You have a lot to learn about your profession and some issues with maturity. Your fellow nurses are a lot more intelligent than you think and can sense your real perception and attitude toward them. It sounds as if you need to learn how to have genuine respect for them, realize you have a lot to learn about the politics (which are the same in any job in any profession) and do some sole searching to understand if the clinical enviroment is the right place for you. Maybe you should do your two years in a lowly med/surg unit and then go back to get your MSN full-time and teach. The educational environment may be where you are most comfortable and you can deal in theory and not people and reality. In that setting your academic record will be praised. On the floor, you are a just another new grad with minimal people skills and a lot to learn whether you believe that or not. Good Luck.
Alphadog,
That's a little harsh. You don't know for sure that the poster is immature, with an attitude, etc. We need to support our new grads. I don't want to start a flame war, but when new nurse retention is problematic, we need to introduce the to the clinical world witha little more compassion. Yes, they will be humbled, learn that they don't know everything, but do we as nurses have to join in the fun? I don't think so. We need to MENTOR new nurses.
Did you have any clinical experience prior to going to school to earn your BSN? From your comments, it sounds as if you may have not had any before you got into school, otherwise you would have understood what the environment is like in the real world. The concerns you are describing and their tone are indicative of a more theory based and minimal clinically based education. It's great that you were class President in undergrad and that you were accepted to a prestigious MSN program. I hope you had enough emotional intelligence to not laude these over the heads of your peer nurses. They are the ones who have had the real training and survival skills doing the job everyday under difficult conditions whiere you obvously have issues and a lack of respect for their capabilities.
What have you learned from the on the job experience you have had so far? How much glass did you break when you escalated and demanded a new preceptor? Perhaps you need to change your attitude, humble yourself(you may believe you were humble but you probably communicated your inflated sense of your capabilities in other ways to the other nurses) and realize your real education started the first day of your real job as an RN. Your statement denegrating new nurses who spend there first year in med/surg illustrates the core of your problem . As a new grad, you start at the bottom and hopefully learn something over time. You have a lot to learn about your profession and some issues with maturity. Your fellow nurses are a lot more intelligent than you think and can sense your real perception and attitude toward them. It sounds as if you need to learn how to have genuine respect for them, realize you have a lot to learn about the politics (which are the same in any job in any profession) and do some sole searching to understand if the clinical enviroment is the right place for you. Maybe you should do your two years in a lowly med/surg unit and then go back to get your MSN full-time and teach. The educational environment may be where you are most comfortable and you can deal in theory and not people and reality. In that setting your academic record will be praised. On the floor, you are a just another new grad with minimal people skills and a lot to learn whether you believe that or not. Good Luck.
I won't validate your response with a long-winded answer. Your assumptions could not be farther from the truth. I only mentioned my academic record during the interview processes. And yes this "theory based bragger" did have clinical experience prior this position both through clinicals at school (at a magnet hospital) and via a four month professional practicum in the ED. Let's not count the two years I was a tech at the magnet hospital. And before that I had another life as a financial analyst (nursing is my second degree).
On a separate note - This brings me to a conclusion...and I've heard it but didn't follow it. Try and find a magnet hospital...because yes there will always be a certain amount of horizontal violence were the occasional bully like "alphadog (kind of inherent by the name don't you think)" gets his or her kicks but overall the culture was amazing. I didn't accept their job offer because the sign-on bonus was the lowest - I have an interview there next week and will probably accept it because I know what I'm getting into there. I will (for the most part) be valued and respected and around professionals.
In my experience most ICU/ER/specialty areas are tough crowds. That is one reason I think new grads should be on a med surg or other "regular" floor for the breaking in period. No matter how good a nurse you are, no matter how good your school, reality is different than being a student, and nurses can be so intense that they have little patience for new people, students, or agency/pulled nurses. It is sad. We should be there for one another.
That being said I will say that not all units or hospitals are the same. Before you decide that you have made a big mistake, try another unit or another hospital. You sound dedicated and you just have to find the right place to fit in.
Nursing is so hard. People on the outside have no idea how much stress we are all under. No one supports us, we need to be there for each other. Living every single day in high gear with the knowledge that every move you make could kill someone is tough. Only docs share the same kind of stress but they are too self-important to support us. We have to be there for each other. Remember your bad experience and never let it happen to another new grad under your watch. That's what I did after a bad experience as a new grad. I take care of students and new nurses with kindness and support and I encourage others to do the same.
Alphadog I am sure that the staff there saw her as intimidating, but you have to realize that when people are insecure in their abilities they either overstate their confidence or quiver with fear like jello. This is why the experienced nurse should be able to recognize both behaviors and support her the right way. We are supposed to be able to deal with all sorts of people and if we are not using these skills to deal with one another something is wrong.
I think not every nurse is suited to be a preceptor and this should be a voluntary position. Some nurses resent the imposition on their time, and are too insecure themselves to teach others. A smart manager would have recognized that the situation is bigger than just one new grad's attitude or lack of clinical. It is up to management to fix this dysfunctional situation, or they are not going to be able to keep staff.
Having been in an ICU where the nurses eat their young, (Iwas lunch) I can see both sides of the story. On the one hand, you have a few new grads that come out and are really sharp and quick learners. On the other hand you have a lot of new grads who are so in over their heads, and just don't make it in that kind of environment. Precepting is really, really hard. It's literally doing two jobs at the smae time, but only having the time for one. Many times the nurse who do poorly end up blaming the preceptor, when everyone can see a mile away that the new grad is jus t not making it. So the preceptors are killing themselves training people who aren't cut out to be ICU nurses. It's a tough situation all around.
Having been in an ICU where the nurses eat their young, (Iwas lunch) I can see both sides of the story. On the one hand, you have a few new grads that come out and are really sharp and quick learners. On the other hand you have a lot of new grads who are so in over their heads, and just don't make it in that kind of environment. Precepting is really, really hard. It's literally doing two jobs at the smae time, but only having the time for one. Many times the nurse who do poorly end up blaming the preceptor, when everyone can see a mile away that the new grad is jus t not making it. So the preceptors are killing themselves training people who aren't cut out to be ICU nurses. It's a tough situation all around.
I'm wonder, however, how many new grads might become great ICU nurses with a little more kindness? People have a lot of learning styles. I wonder if ICUs are limiting themselves by only taking quick learners, whereas somebody with a little more precepting by the right preceptro might do well.
I am just reminded of several nurses I know--one was the best ICU nurse I ever knew, who was told either in school or at the beginning of her career that she was horrible and not cut out to be a nurse.
Perhaps the ICU culture (survival of the fittest) is not the most efficient or effective way to train new nurses.
Specializes in Chiropractic assistant, CNA in LTC, RN.
What saddens me the most is healthcare is the ONE field where we ALL truly need to work together for the sake of our patients. No staff member is more important than another and that holds true whether you be a physician or a housekeeper. The saddest part is that, even though team work is essential for a good patient outcome, healthcare seems to be the one area where team work is most lacking.
. I graduated near the top of my BSN class (I was class President) in May 2008 and was accepted to a prestigious MSN program in the same month. At that time, I had several offers but I accepted a new grad RN position in a CVICU. During my interview I felt I asked all the right questions (turnover rates, ratios, floating, etc.). I started my nursing career with a bright and positive outlook.
Why are we left on our own so soon??? On my first day of orientation in the ER...I was in trauma and left alone when my preceptor went on break...How crazy is this? I was so scared...giving fentanyl every 30 minutes...assessing my MI patient, and assessing my other patient for any compartment syndrome...Its only my first week and I already have two patients in the ER...but at the end of the day because of admitting and transferring patients I end up having 6 or 7 patients...
BSNin2008
43 Posts
I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one feeling this way. I am at the point I don't know what to do anymore. After my 9 days with a preceptor as a new grad I was on my own. This is a very busy med-surg tele floor. It's been a month now. The last time I worked I had 7 patients. Two patients were total care. 5 were diabetic with AC/HS checks and most on standing insulin orders on top of sliding scale, 5 on IV fluids or meds. One discharge with none of the paperwork done and he was sitting in bed at 10 am with his clothes on ready to go. I cried that day.
Alot of the people I was in orientation with are unhappy. Some have already left. As for me, I am having nightmares, I have starting sleepwalking; never did THAT before! I woke up once standing in my bedroom trying to hook up my radio as an IV pump. Can you say stressed out?
Seriously though. What do I do? I am a new grad with one month experience? Who would want me? And I sure won't be applying for any med surg jobs!! Any advice would be greatly appreciated!
New Grad RN