need aa sponsor

sissiesmama, ASN, RN · Oct 31, 2008

hi all, i've been in aa for a few weeks now and was wondering on how to get an aa sponsor. do i need to go up to someone and ask before they leave, their isn't anybody i've clicked with yet. it seems very clique after the meetings and i end up just going home. i do get alot from sharing and hearing other peoples stories. i can't change my meeting yet as i'm in outpatient treatment and have meetings/appointments the other days. i'm in my states (NY) assistance program and know i need to be doing all i can to stay sober/reinstate my license which includes mentoring/support from a sponsor. thanx for any advice

Hello, and welcome to our forum! I am an RN, and also an addict. In September, I celebrated my 9th sobriety bday, thank God! I had a little trouble finding a sponsor at first too. I just tried to check out different meetings and met a bunch of people. Finally, I met one that seemed to be "a good fit", and she has been a wonderful source of support for me.

Good luck, and pm me anytime if needed.

Anne, RNC

bossynurse101 · Nov 1, 2008

Welcome! I can truly say that a sponsor is vital for growth in recovery. Because our disease is a disease of perception, it takes someone else to point out what isnt always obvious, or call us on our bs, or point out denial, etc etc. For me the best approach is to:

1 pray and ask for His guidance. But know that what we need and what we want are two different things.

2. Ask someone if they will be a "temporary" sponsor - that way if it doesnt "click" it isnt so awkward to change sponsors. I have moved a couple of times in sobriety and this has worked well.

3. I found most of my strong female supports at womens meetings, that is a good place to look.

4. Dont wait too long.

Good luck!

chiefshewho · Nov 1, 2008

I remember a few months ago when I needed a sponsor. I had a phone list from my first meeting. The majority of the people had a long sobriety at this step meeting. I went home and emailed a person. She said yes. It was a scary feeling to ask. I know how you feel. I heard at a meeting to maybe do this. Bring up a topic about sponsors. Let the group know you are looking. People might say they sponsor and could give you a choice to make it easier. Even if it is not a topic you might want to bring it up because it will help your sobriety.

Tweety, BSN, RN · Nov 1, 2008

The sponsor you pick doesn't have to be one you have forever. Perhaps in a meeting you can share you're looking for a "temporary sponsor" and someone will volunteer.

It's good you're showing such willingness.

Welcome to Allnurses, I hope that you stick around.