waiting on this score.

I took the NCLEX yesterday at 8am... which if you asks me feels like an eternity ago but maybe that because I have been going crazy since I left not because it was only a mere 38 hours ago. From the very beginning before I even started studying I talked with my mom about what I wanted the day of the NCLEX. Mom I said I want more than 75 questions -- I want about 100. I just didn't think I was smart enough to prove my worthiness of being a nurse in 75 questions so needless to say I wanted more knowing that if they gave me enough they would see my intelligence the four years I had slaved away at nursing school the four weeks of summer wasted stuck inside of an NCLEX book. Yesterday after I answered my 75th question the screen went black and my heart sunk into my feet... there was no way I could have passed. Medications I had never even heard of, SATA which I always got wrong on Kaplan, and some rare skin disease I later looked up because I had didn't even know how to pronounce it never mind what it was. I have been on allnurses throughout my nursing school career so I thought at this moment in the middle of my nervous breakdown where else to go but to other people who are freaking out as much as I am. Failing to me is unacceptable; especially at 75... like really could I be that dumb that they won't even let me try to answer the next 190 questions? Coming from a long line of nursing my grandmother mother older sister, younger cousin (nursing student), and even younger cousin getting accepted to nursing programs now... all of who have had the chance have passed the NCLEX on the first try... the pressure is on. I wanted to throw up all day yesterday, struggled to get a mere four hours of sleep, and am OCD with the pearson vue website... is my grade there yet? please? I even attempted to look at the state board in hopes my name would have my license number sitting right next to it. NO LUCK! the only thing left to do was to try the pearson vue trick... the one that my clinical partner of four years talked about in the beginning of our senior year... I got the pop up and am now praying that I am not the first person on this website to have failed receiving this pop up... Wish me luck my scores if Pearson knows what is good for my body will be up tommorow, and somehow by the grace of god i will be able to sleep... 12ish hours and counting... and im bored of waiting already... Nursing school was awful, studying for half of summer was worse, taking the NCLEX was equal, but this waiting game is AWFUL.