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Ever searched in a patients' room for what you thought she said she needed to "watch her pocketbook" , she staring at you and you staring at her. Then finally saying, mam what color is your pocketbook because I don't see a pocket book here. Only to have her say, no get my washtub out of the drawer, my washcloth and soap. I always like to wash my pocketbook before I go anywhere. Especially down for tests. And close that curtain, too. Then you say, Oh.
Ohhh MY. I cant believe you have that screen name! LMAO
How Hilarious is that. That is a true story. Actually this is what happened
I went in to assess her and she said i need to have a BM. I said OK. So i proceeded to get a suppository to give her and she said. "Last night that male nurse put the suppository in my Muffie!" I was like ...... He did? she said Yes. I apologized for the male nurse. and i said did you tell him? she said "No i didnt want to embarass him." I left the room and LMAO
So advise for male nurses.... Put the rectal suppository in the right cavity!
My brother and I always called it the front door and the back door.
I say va-jay-jay now because of Grey's Anatomy. That line cracked me up.
And someone mentioned a patient wanting to air out. My grandma always took off our diapers as babies so we could. "get some air." Mkaes for some lovely baby pics.
My Mother has always referred to lady parts's as poonies and a member as a tallywagger. :uhoh21: My Aunt refers to flatulence as sparkles. Bubbles maybe, but sparkles? They grew up in a household where sex was never mentioned nor were they even prepared mentally for all the glory that being a woman entails.
I can't decide which is worse my Mother and her slang, or my youngest daughter and her extreme curiosity of the human anatomy. Actually they are both quite entertaining.
Nursonegreat
88 Posts
A friend of mine was taking care of a post op pt in the PACU and she had something like a lap appy...and she asked if the doctor went above her MOPF (pronounced mumpf is how i hear it) and he said where is that and she replied above the Mound Of ***** Fat. we still laugh hysterically about MOPFs.