7 months and I can't do this anymore.

Specialties Ob/Gyn

Published

I am a 40yo who switched careers to nursing after a long previous career in nothing related to nursing. I absolutely dread going to work each shift. I feel so inadequate and... sure, I realize that I'm new, however, this constant cheering on by other staff to stick it out a year isn't encouraging and I was a pretty strong, no BS person in my former career. I am drained. I work in a high-risk facility and deal with so many problem patients, deaths, STAT everything, etc. I am hyper-aware of how litigious this area is, and I'm always waiting for a patient to pounce or my manager to scrutinize my documentation. I received an orientation with inconsistent preceptors, feel there's always something I didn't learn daily and overall, in my past career, I would have been well on my way to good at this point. I spent so much money re-educating myself for a BSN, and I feel like I made a huge mistake. I'm trying to see if I can find a middle ground of a more administrative position or perhaps something in an office. I don't even care what specialty anymore (L+D was what I was in love with in nursing school), but I want a normal outside life again and could care less what specialty. The hours are crushing my health and my family notices how drained I am, impatient, angry and fed up, which makes me feel so defeated and embarrassed. I don't know what avenues are even out there for a newbie that are slower and less stressful, or is this it for me? This is nursing, suck it up and deal? I'm at the end of my rope here. I need some advice from anyone. Ready to just cry each shift, but I need to bring home a paycheck and hide my discontent.

Specializes in Critical Care, Transplant..
These are the types of threads that terrify me frankly. I am also a career changer and will be almost 40 when I graduate with my associate's in nursing. I haven't begun school yet, but when I read comments from intelligent people who are not complainers and are truly trying to make the best of things at a difficult work environment and yet STILL want to run for the hills, it gives me pause. Shall I turn back now before it's too late?

I originally wanted to go into medicine, but with a young family, that option is not feasible right now. Honestly, our family could really use the money that working in the nursing field would bring. My current job is not enough to feed a family on. Nursing is a relatively quick and inexpensive upfront investment of time and money (community college programs), compared to PA school or medical school. I'm hoping I am not making a big mistake and will eventually find my niche. As some of you have mentioned, nursing is a very diverse field and there should be something out there for everyone. . .

To be blunt choosing a career solely based money is never a smart move...

Specializes in Critical Care, Postpartum.

@herbie06:

I make more as a nurse than I did in my previous career. I decided to change my career due to the many opportunities nursing provides. You may not start out landing your dream job or you may realize your dream job isn't so dreamy. In this economy, yes you'll most likely start in an undesirable unit/specialty before you get to where your niche is. Nursing isn't for the faint of heart, you will work hard. Our patients will name us the most trusted profession and at the same time give us the least respect.

I knew going in that finding a job as a new grad may be difficult and it was. That was in part my fault because I was very picky on what positions I wanted to apply for. I finally was able to get into critical care almost a year after I graduated. The learning curve was steep, but I luckily worked on a unit that was new grad friendly and my preceptor was supportive.

The real world of nursing is different than nursing as a student. I realized that from day one but I wasn't interested in a 3rd career. I enjoy what I do and work with great people. Knowing what I know now, yes I still would have chosen nursing the first time around.

It's up to you if you want to continue to pursue nursing; we can't make that decision for you. Good luck!

iPink, I appreciate your respectful and candid response. I love science, working with patients, and teaching, so I think nursing is a good fit for my interests. Working overseas in areas that don't have access to healthcare is something I hope to do someday as well. I have many friends and family who are nurses, and I have also worked as a PCA and alongside nurses in various healthcare settings, so I am going into this profession with eyes wide open.

I have close friend who is a new nurse (career changer) as of a couple years ago, and she had a rough go of it as a new grad. She ended up moving out of state for half a year in order to gain some good experience in an area of the country where nurses are desperately needed and will be hired into almost any specialty in the hospital setting. I am preparing myself for the possibility that my family and I will need to move in order to get a job as a new nurse.

Best wishes to you, OP. I hope that you find an area of nursing and/or a new job in which you will feel more comfortable.

@herbie06:

I make more as a nurse than I did in my previous career. I decided to change my career due to the many opportunities nursing provides. You may not start out landing your dream job or you may realize your dream job isn't so dreamy. In this economy, yes you'll most likely start in an undesirable unit/specialty before you get to where your niche is. Nursing isn't for the faint of heart, you will work hard. Our patients will name us the most trusted profession and at the same time give us the least respect.

I knew going in that finding a job as a new grad may be difficult and it was. That was in part my fault because I was very picky on what positions I wanted to apply for. I finally was able to get into critical care almost a year after I graduated. The learning curve was steep, but I luckily worked on a unit that was new grad friendly and my preceptor was supportive.

The real world of nursing is different than nursing as a student. I realized that from day one but I wasn't interested in a 3rd career. I enjoy what I do and work with great people. Knowing what I know now, yes I still would have chosen nursing the first time around.

It's up to you if you want to continue to pursue nursing; we can't make that decision for you. Good luck!

Every nurse is not a good fit for every department. It takes different personalities to mesh with each specialty. Add in that nursing care in a hospital at least is changing weekly it seems, and there's no wonder new grads, especially more seasoned workers, are struggling with feelings. I'm a nursery nurse, have been for over30 years. I've seen nurses, new and experienced ones, come and go. For some its finding out the harsher realities. For some its the inability to fit the hours in with their families and personal lives. It is so hard to feel you can and are doing your best but worry you are not. All it takes is an unsympathetic nurse or nasty Dr to make you second think your choice and ability. Seek out the good ones and shadow them. Stand up, firmly but politely to the Drs. Give yourself enough time to really learn the area, so you can say, "yes I can do this, it's just not me". Keep your eyes and ears open for jobs that might allow you to use skills you built in your " pre-life". Above all, get in the car each morning with a positive attitude that you are one day stronger, smarter, or closer to a good decision. At the end of the day, sit in your car for a minute and replay what when down during the shift. Take a few deep breaths and leave the bad there in the parking lot. But take care of you! No one else can as well as you. Best wishes to all of you who are struggling, and know this....I was you once too. And I made it through. You can too, somewhere.

I'm sorry you are feeling this way about work! I did med/surg, mother-baby and then came to L&D. We are a level 2, and I've been doing this for 8 months. This is hands down the hardest job I've ever had. I can't imagine learning about baby, iv's, foley cath etc on top of labor. I know some people have came out of nursing school and did well in a specialty. This would not be me. I would give it a year, but maybe if youback tracked on a surgical floor or Mbu for awhile, you would find you still love L&D. It's hard, I feel for you! Don't give up, just look at other options,í ½í¸˜

Hi

I know these post make me sad. DO NOT give up. We have been there I did a nursing change at age 49 to labor and delivery. It was tough handsome days I ask myself-- "should I stilled this" It is a special time in a women's life. I like the previous posters advice. I would go to a less critical L/D floor. You need to have days that you feel like you did a good job, to feel good about what you do. I hope it is going better

Suggest you take a vacation of at least a week to recharge your energy levels. Then you will be able to look at everything without an exhausted view. If you want to come down from the stress levels while maintaining nursing employment, you might want to consider extended care home health. That is about the least stress area in nursing that exists. You only are responsible for one client during your shift and the work is routine for the most part. Some even find it boring at times. But better to be bored with a paycheck than stressed out and ruining your health. Good luck.

Specializes in L&D, home health, long term care.

I'm so sorry so many of you are having these horrible experiences! I have been a RN for a year and I was a LPN for 7 years before that. Thankfully I have had wonderful preceptors and thick skin towards doctors. However, thats not the case for everyone. My recommendation is to first and foremost, respectfully assert yourself to the doctors. Do everything in decency and order but you don't have to be degraded and abused. Secondly, as others have said, explore the field of nursing! I have worked in long term care, skilled visits home health, private duty home health for both pediatrics and geriatrics, internal medicine, a university student health facility, a pregnancy resource center (pregnancy tests, sex education, ultrasounds, and informing pt's on basic prenatal care), flu and wellness clinics, and finally in the hospital in L&D. There are many many more other options out there, hospice, industrial nursing at plants, dialysis, insurance companies, all of the many different types of doctors offices, some dental offices, public health. Just explore! Try different areas of the hospital as well. Everywhere will have their pros and cons but you will find something that is right for you. The pay may not be as great but your mental and physical well being is more than worth the pay cut. Plus, with things like home health, you can pick up a few shifts a month as your part time job to get a little extra. You can do it! Don't quit! And once you find that niche, remember how you feel now so you can help someone else who is new.

Specializes in OB.

I totally agree with all the other posters who have said there are SO many options for RNs! Find something that fits you. Such as school nurse, industrial nurse, outpatient clinic, nursing home, assisted living, rehab, psych, public health, WIC, home health, IV team, management, quality, utilization review, case management, educator, it just goes on and on. I have worked many different areas over the course of my career. Some I loved, some not-so-much! But I don't regret any of it! I've learned so much about myself and met so many wonderful people over the course of my career. Good Luck to you!!

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