Mixed Emotions: Not Sure If Nursing Is For Me

JBMmom, MSN, NP · Oct 31, 2022

It would be nearly impossible for someone else to tell you what's going to be a good fit for you. If you enjoy the NICU, you clearly have an opportunity to observe exactly what the nurses are doing on a day to day basis. Does that appeal to you? People come to message boards largely to complain. It's like reading reviews on amazon, people are far more likely to take the time to complain than they are to write something good. I would hazard a guess that there are nearly as many people on this board that enjoy their jobs, but that's not usually worthy of a thread.

The one thing you mention that I found odd was your statement that you would hate sitting in front of a computer but one of your future plans is research nurse. Research is going to be mainly computer work in one form or another. But even by your account, you have years to think about it. Good luck figuring out your plan. And remember, nothing has to last forever. I started a new profession in my later 30s and a new career in my late 40s. Things change, hope you find what you're looking for.

pastalover99 · Oct 31, 2022

Thank you for your comment. But in my post, I said "ultimate long term" regarding clinical research so sometime in the future. My mind will probably change on computer work by the time I reach that point and who knows, it may change when I'm in nursing school, if that is what I end up pursuing. So I don't think my statement is that odd considering people's minds change.

DavidFR, BSN, MSN, RN · Oct 31, 2022

"Clinical research" is a broad term. You can be a "research nurse" which involves alot of data input. You could also work on an inpatient clinical trials unit which still keeps you by the bedside with patients and while you're recording data to an extent, you're still basically a bedside nurse with the boring hard data input being done later by a CRA.

I agree with the poster who said nobody can tell you what you'll like. It has to come from within you and remember one man's poison is another man's nectar.

What I did find troubling in your post is that you say you've been shouted at and even sexually harassed. Sounds like a toxic environment and maybe you'd enjoy nursing in a healthier workplace? Also, sexual harassment is extremely serious. I hope you were able to bring the perpetrator to task?

JKL33 · Nov 1, 2022

Complicated question. Will offer some thoughts though I agree only you can decide.

First is to enjoy the fundamental things that nursing involves. It sounds like you do.

In my opinion, the (close) second is to understand how the nursing profession is generally regarded and treated (by those who employ nurses -- not by a random manager, physician, coworker or patient); to understand that (IMO) practicing the nursing profession the way that many of us feel it should be practiced (and they way we were taught) will very often put you at direct odds with those who control your paycheck. That is a problem. That is at the core of much of the "complaining" you see online or may hear IRL. My personal feeling is that it is a very significant problem and if one wants to be a nurse one should understand its ramifications; how it plays out in everyday life.

This does very often mean being expected to do an impossible amount of nursing without the resources that would make it possible to do those things (or do them well/properly). Nursing school tends to imply that the ethical/moral conflicts in nursing have to do with evil physicians, or coworkers, or management; it tends to minimize the fact that there is a foundational conflict with the business interests of the healthcare industry/employers. And that is the situation you will work within every day.

I would say that the people who do best in nursing tend to not be restricted by thinking they need to work in a certain place or a certain role. I'd say it's definitely a profession where you need to have an understanding and flexibility to make it work well for you.

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turtlesRcool · Nov 2, 2022

Based on the brief glimpse you've provided into your life, I think you should go for it.

You already work in a hospital. You see how fast-paced it is. You see how difficult some patients/families/staff members can be. Okay, your patients are babies, so they're probably not being mean to you, but still. You've been at it for 3 years, and you still like it. That says something about how you will cope as a nurse.

Some student nurses have no idea what the reality of floor nursing is like, and they are stressed beyond belief when they find themselves expected to function in an environment that is far different from the ideal NCLEX scenarios. For others, it's the wear and tear of trying to do their best for their patients, but being unable to give them the care the patients deserve due to poor staffing ratios, unresponsive colleagues, lack of equipment, etc.

But not every workplace is like that. Most people who genuinely enjoy caring for people in a medical environment can be happy as nurses if they find the right job for them. The key is to be flexible and be willing to try different roles.

Fortunately, nurses have more options as to where/how they work than PCTs do. You might stay in a hospital or you might transition to something else. If it's too stressful for you inpatient, you can always move to a doctor's office or procedural area. Once you've got a year or two under your belt in a facility, you can venture out into home care or hospice. The pay isn't as good outpatient, but an outpatient RN is going to be making more than an inpatient PCT, so you'll still be ahead.

Plus, you say you don't want to be a PCT forever, but it doesn't seem like you have another career path vying with nursing. If you came on here and said you are torn between nursing and, say, accounting, we might tell you to try accounting and see how you like it. But in your case, there's nothing else you have a strong desire to try. So why not try nursing? To me it seems like if you don't pursue your RN, you'll just stay a PCT, and you started your OP saying you want more than that.

Guest1198722 · Nov 3, 2022

On 10/30/2022 at 10:44 AM, pastalover99 said:

I have been a PCT in the NICU for the past three years. I like what I do, but at this point- I need more pay and I want to do more. But I am so mixed because I have some colleagues who tell me to pursue my RN and others who tell me to not. Then I see people on here and on r/nursing saying that nursing was their biggest mistake and they wish they have done something else. I often see nurses on Reddit say go into tech but I have no interest in tech. The only pro would be the pay but I wouldn't be doing what makes me happy. Before I was a PCT, I did a coding bootcamp and hated it so much that I dropped out of the program. I can't imagine spending all day looking at computer, I would be miserable. I know there are other things like UX/PM but that's not what interests me. As a PCT, I have been yelled at, sexually harassed and told things that made me fear for my life, yet I still like what I do.

So now I am so stuck on what to do. My ultimate long term goal would be to become a clinical research nurse. I would like to work bedside for a few years, then leave and do outpatient or clinical research. I just really love nursing because there are so many options. I love science and helping others.

You answered your own question- you love nursing. Become a nurse!.

nikkulele77, BSN · Nov 4, 2022

I largely agree with the other commenters. Just remember, if you do become a nurse, there are days when you love it and there will be days that you hate it. It's OK to hate it once in awhile. doesn't mean don't do it. There are things you can do build resilience. There are a lot of avenues to pursue if something isn't working for you. Sometimes working with the right group of people makes it all worth it. At the end of the day, does it give you purpose? Is it fulfilling? Maybe not all of the time, but most of the time? Some good questions to ask yourself. Good Luck!

byebyebedside, BSN, MSN, RN, NP · Nov 5, 2022

If you are still considering nursing after the experiences you've had as a PCT, I think that's a strong indicator that it might be an okay career path for you. I am one of those people who always says if I was a PCT or had more exposure, I wouldn't have chosen nursing. As far as being "happy" in your career, healthcare is in an extremely tough spot right now, especially pediatrics (if that's where you plan on staying). You have to weigh the pros and cons of what you want your life to look like such as schedule, pay, work life balance and the roles and responsibilities of a beside RN to make the best decision for you.

As far as working in clinical research, I know two nurses who left the bedside to do this but they were both second degree nurses with previous degrees in science. Not saying this is a prerequisite by any means, but if this is something you're interested in you should look up some of those positions and see what they require for applicants. This also might be a stretch but if your institution has that role, given your experience with the institution you might be able to shadow someone in that role to see if it fits your expectations.

Good luck! Choosing a career path is not easy and just remember that if it isn't the perfect fit with bedside nursing or clinical research nursing, you can always do something else in the field of nursing and it doesn't have to be tech.