Oh my gosh.... I did a paper on this topic years ago. it was controversial then, and remains so today. I believe it is all about education. Most family members who won't let go, just don't understand. Everything is relative. If a son has seen his mother decline over the years, he may truly not see how bad off she is, and how horrible her quality of life is ( and yet he is asked to make the decsion to "stop the heroics") When really the question might be, "When did it stop being standard care, and become heroics?" " I mean we've done everytning up till now, and now y'all just want to give up????" Modern medicine is tough. We, on the outside, see horrible suffering with poor prognosis. We have to suction them & do painfull wound care, as we watch every organ fail. They, on the inside, see their wife of 43 years, whom they have loved dearly, and we are asking THEM to make that pivotal decision. Who can make such a decsision without knowing? I wish we could bring a TV camera into our daily jobs and show the world what our patients endure. The general public just doesn't understand the miracle of modern medicine enough to forsee what they might endure, all for a heart rhythm, poorly perfused pulse, and ventilated breath. It breaks my heart daily. I do NOT blame the families that just don't see. I fear I will have a battle on my hands when my loved ones become terminal, because my family cares deeply, but doesn't understand.