I am sitting around feeling sorry for myself today because I have put in a tremendous amount of work, energy and money in a career that still leaves me as a bedside nurse. The current job is a long commute, long hours and I hurt so bad when I get home I can barely get up the steps to the front door. There are many negatives about the job but there is no need to go into that. Not that it matters, because I am stuck with it. I dreamed of being a nurse educator for patients in a hospital. So, I went back to school , got my BSN, then my MSN as an educator. It made no difference, I couldn't get a job. Everything I have tried to do has failed, and believe me I have tried a lot of things, but for me nothing seems to work out. Yep, having a real pitty party here.
I once wrote for advice because I wasn't successful in getting a hospital job. I got so much nasty negative feedback that I didn't come back to the site for a few years. Comments such as, you are old and fat it's no wonder, etc. That was a heavy spirit crusher. So, I am hoping for kindness now.
I am envious of the many glorious success stories of happy nurses. But, not having any support financially or otherwise all my life, I guess I am doing ok. At least I'm working, right? I just don't know if I can make it to retirement or not. I am fatigued mentally and physically and really disappointed in how it has all turned out. My life's main goal is to get to work, get through my shift and get home to bed. I do this 12 days straight then off 2, because I work two jobs right now.
Recently there were two nurses who came to the unit in order to recruit for an online nursing program, they were passing out candy and such. One nurse said she had her doctorate. I was so jealous, here I was at least 20 years older than she was and killing myself working at the bedside while she passes out candy. Yea, I am sure it was just appearances, but I would have traded places in a millisecond.
I hope someone can encourage me. I really need it.
There are many key concepts here. Location seems to not be ideal for the position you want. Sometimes you have to go the extra mile and really venture out into the world instead of wondering what could have, would have or should have.
or maybe try rehab hospital? I work in an acute rehab and my nurse educator only works in this hospital her entire nursing career. Tbh, she's not a real good educator. The only time I saw her presentation for education was just once a year during annual skills checkoff (and that was very brief), she lost my TB test record (I found out she lost it when I asked for a copy because she was the one who kept all the original documents, never gave me a copy), and she's never asked for my CPR card during my work there, which is bizarre because I thought I couldn't work if they don't have record of my CPR card(?)
But she got her job done, anyway, and I think that's what matters for corporate.
My point is you can try rehab hospital or LTC or even psych (sorry, I was just ranting about the nurse educator in my rehab hospital and that's irrelevant). I used to work in a psych before I jumped into rehab. I worked with a competent nurse educator during my work in psych hospital, and yes nurse educator does make difference ?
I worked in a position once where I was able to teach some. I would take opportunities that presented themselves. I taught a couple of aide how to apply an ace wrap to legs, they were extremely appreciative and one said, no one ever taught us anything before. Now, that was a terrible shame. I think people should at least be given the chance to learn and grown.
AND I hate being presented with the same old information year after year. I mean nursing changes all the time, at least put something new in there, at least discuss innovations and trends. That is one thing that makes a class pertinent.
There are many key concepts here. Location seems to not be ideal for the position you want. Sometimes you have to go the extra mile and really venture out into the world instead of wondering what could have, would have or should have.
I wish I had done administration, but I was always heard that you should go for what makes you the happiest. I have been practical all my life, just making decisions on what was the right thing, the sensible thing, the smart thing to do. Even though nursing was not a free-choice of career, I liked teaching the best. So... that is what I did my MSN in.
Unfortunately right now I can't leave my current location for various reasons. But, I am preparing for it.
RosesrReder, BSN, MSN, RN
8,498 Posts
There are many key concepts here. Location seems to not be ideal for the position you want. Sometimes you have to go the extra mile and really venture out into the world instead of wondering what could have, would have or should have.