Maybe it was a big mistake to be a nurse :(

[NewYorkGirl]

I just graduated in May and have been working Med-surg at a community hospital. I got my RN/BSN b/c I wanted to help people. I took a med-surg job b/c I was told that you need 1 year of med-surg.

It's a magnet hospital and the people are great, but I hated med-surg in school and I hate it again now.

I'm realizing that being a bedside hospital RN is not the place for me. I get so stressed out (even though I have lots of support on my orientation) and I cry every day and I have to force myself to get out the door in the morning b/c I'm just dreading another day of it.

I liked my Psych preceptorship in school, and the psychiatric hospital were I worked as a mental health worker has said they would like to have me there as an RN - but DH is worried I'll get attacked by my patients again like when I was a MHW there.

I love the elderly so I though maybe working in a nursing home instead? What does an RN do there?

Does anyone have any advice for me on what I could do that would utilize my education but doesn't involve crazy amounts of stress (emotional and physical)?

I'm so upset right now Thanks for any advice you have for me.

[BrokenRNheart]

No advice but I feel for ya.

I am sickened by the job every time I go to it. It doesn't matter what area. I am tired of being rushed beyond the extreme of being able to think safely and act safely and praying all along that you have done just that.

I don't feel there is any reason for it when we are dealing with patients lives.

I'm leaving the profession. I can't kid myself. I believe the conditions has traumatized me and I can't stomach it any more.

[ilstu99]

I didn't pick med-surg because I knew it wasn't for me. Don't get me wrong....I'm glad someone loves it because one day I'll probably need them! For a lot of reasons, I passed on the "one year of med-surg" advice, and applied to the departments I really wanted. I was hired directly to the NICU, and I absolutely LOVE it. I just prefer the critical care environment, and there's something acutely satisfying in knowing that this baby relies on me for every single thing they need. I consider it an honor. Corny, I know. Still true.

And let me say that the "one year" theory might have helped me in some ways, but not a ton. NICU is completely different than anything I learned in school....meds, assessments, equipment....everything. Talking to people who have also taken other routes right out of school, the opinion seems to be the same.

If you're considering a change, don't limit yourself. Do a LOT of research. Talk to other nurses in other units. Ask your HR department who's hiring, and if you can have a look. Read the paper, and consider options outside of a hospital. Think about what you want to do for your patients....what you enjoy about your job now...and I bet there's an opportunity that is mostly what you enjoy, with a lot less of what you don't.

Good luck.

[medsurgrnco, BSN, RN]

Suggest you read through some posts in specialty forums on AllNurses.com to get a feel for those areas.

[BelleKat, BSN, RN]

No advice but I feel for ya.

I am sickened by the job every time I go to it. It doesn't matter what area. I am tired of being rushed beyond the extreme of being able to think safely and act safely and praying all along that you have done just that.

I don't feel there is any reason for it when we are dealing with patients lives.

I'm leaving the profession. I can't kid myself. I believe the conditions has traumatized me and I can't stomach it any more.

I'm sorry to hear that BrokenRNheart,I'm struggling with this issue myself.:icon_hug:

[DreamingTree]

You do have a lot of other options available to you. Before making a change, though, consider the exact reasons why you dread medsurg. Is it the type of work involved, or is it the fear of making a mistake?

I dreaded clinicals when I was in school. Every week I'd feel the same dread about having to go back. I figured out that my problem was a lack of confidence in my skills and the fear of making a mistake. As my confidence grew, the less I dreaded going (other than the early mornings!!). Now I'm working in medsurg and get the same feeling from time to time. It usually comes as I'm reading through the kardex of a complicated pt, fearing that I won't be able to handle everything. It's nerve racking to think of all that could go wrong or to think too far ahead about the amount of work to be done. Taking a few deep breaths and tackling the tasks one at a time puts my mind at ease.

That's what has worked for me, but your situation & feelings may be totally different. If you simply dislike all of the tasks involved, and it isn't a confidence issue, then trying a new area is the way to go. Good luck!

[NewYorkGirl]

Before making a change, though, consider the exact reasons why you dread medsurg. Is it the type of work involved, or is it the fear of making a mistake?

Well, I'm stressed out by all the things I have to do, and the fear of making a mistake is awful - but I'm also having a hard time dealing with the type of work involved.

I have a very sensitive sense of smell. I was even wondering if I might be pregnant since I started working there b/c I kept feeling like I was going to vomit. Turns out I'm NOT pregnant - I'm just literally sick to my stomach over this job :barf01:

I wish I could just be normal about it but I can't seem to hold it together.

[DreamingTree]

Well, your body may be telling you something -- time to leave. I'm not so sure you'd like LTC any better, though. The smells there can be much worse than on a medsurg floor. If you liked psych before, I'd go that direction. Talk to the other psych nurses at the facility and maybe they can give you suggestions to avoid the situations that concern your husband. Good luck!

[NewYorkGirl]

Well, I resigned today. They mentioned again that I seem unhappy and that if I resigned they would write me lovely recommendation letters, and so that's that. I mean, they obviously don't even want me there.

I learned a big lesson though. I need to try really hard to keep my emotions to myself as much as possible at my next job. They wouldn't have known how stressed out I was if I didn't keep having to run into the bathroom to cry, or if I didn't keep feeling like I was going throw up.

Today I was proud of myself for being super nice when I resigned and for not crying, and I made sure to leave the door open to future possibilities. They said if I ever change my mind about med-surg I can come back (I wouldn't get to be in the new nurse orientation program though).

I think if they really wanted to keep me there then they shouldn't have suggested I resign, of course. So, tomorrow I'm going to look for a psych nursing job.

I feel so relieved though. I'm going to go out to dinner tonight to celebrate!

[FlyingScot, RN]

Well, I resigned today. They mentioned again that I seem unhappy and that if I resigned they would write me lovely recommendation letters, and so that's that. I mean, they obviously don't even want me there.

They said if I ever change my mind about med-surg I can come back.

I think if they really wanted to keep me there then they shouldn't have suggested I resign, of course.

Sounds to me that they liked you as a person and as a nurse. They recognized you were miserable and gave you the chance to fix the situation with no damage to you personally or to your professional reputation. They left the door open for you to come back. Now look at the above quotes how you described what happened. You sound hurt and a little petulant. You've been given a freaking gift by this people. They didn't tear you down or beat you up emotionally. You weren't eaten alive by bitter old nurses. They saw you were struggling emotionally and guided you, kindly I might add, in the direction you needed to go. This is an unusually positive experience in our world and if you choose to you can take it and learn from it and apply it when you see someone else in a similar situation. We know it's scary to change jobs...most of us have been there at least once in our lives. In fact I'm in orientation now to work a hem/onc clinic after 21YEARS of emergency and flight nursing. The thing is you need to focus on the positive aspects of this situation instead of lamenting that "they didn't want me". The truth is you didn't want them!!!! Please don't get me wrong, I'm not yelling at you but if you get this offended (and your words make you sound as if you were) when you are treated nicely you will have a difficult time dealing with what often happens in similar situations with back-stabbing and rumor mongering. Believe me it could have been much worse.

[Crystal2dish]

Well, I resigned today. They mentioned again that I seem unhappy and that if I resigned they would write me lovely recommendation letters, and so that's that. I mean, they obviously don't even want me there.

I learned a big lesson though. I need to try really hard to keep my emotions to myself as much as possible at my next job. They wouldn't have known how stressed out I was if I didn't keep having to run into the bathroom to cry, or if I didn't keep feeling like I was going throw up.

Today I was proud of myself for being super nice when I resigned and for not crying, and I made sure to leave the door open to future possibilities. They said if I ever change my mind about med-surg I can come back (I wouldn't get to be in the new nurse orientation program though).

I think if they really wanted to keep me there then they shouldn't have suggested I resign, of course. So, tomorrow I'm going to look for a psych nursing job.

I feel so relieved though. I'm going to go out to dinner tonight to celebrate!

NYG -You are fortunate in so many ways that you don't really grasp at this point. But I must ask the burning question to you of how is it that you can experience such intense and moving emotions in an environment that made you very miserable, then believe keeping your emotions to yourself will be possible in your next patient care position? Surely if psych is seems to be "it" for you, you have the ability and insight to at least recognize that the emotions and body are inseparable in healthy people. Now that you have said your goodbyes to the horrors of Med Surg, you feel relieved and elated and can eat again.

Have you clarified for yourself what it was about the work in Med Surg that made your body respond as it did? Was it the sights, the sounds, the smells, the contacts? People are people and in Psych, still waters may hide some very deep drop offs. They may also vomit, defecate, swear a blue streak, and other foul and other unpleasantries. The scary ones may feel no emotion at all. Like the sociopathic personality. And if you spend some time there, you will eventually meet the person who will challenge your core emotional fear and shake the inner ground you stand upon.

Hide your emotions? Bury them deep? Only at work? In psych? Listen.

What would you say to the suicidal teen who is on your unit and her history includes regular sexual activity with family members since birth, the inability to physically conceive a child, and isolation from normal socialization processes outside of the home environment? Keep a stiff upper lip? Life is what you make it? Go forth and start anew?

The privileges unique to nursing include the opportunity to appropriately and respectfully connect with others on an emotional level. To tell you that I have physically felt the room fill with the light of joy and happiness at the moment a patient dies, despite the visual of the family crumpled and weeping at their loss is to share with you that I am connected emotionally to myself and able to empathize with everyone else in that room. When the family members hug me and cry on my shoulder, I know that it is okay to let my tears, my emotion, my sadness, show. I don't feel ashamed nor do I ball up in the corner and wail like a toddler. I have found my emotional balance while retaining the professional integrity of a nurse.

I have experienced situations where my gut connection, my emotions, were not in sync with what appeared to be happening. If I ignored my feelings and went along with what I was told to do or what everyone else was doing, eventually I would reach an "Aha" moment and recognize what my feelings, my emotions had picked up on long before my head was in agreement. Like feeling the dagger vision of a bitter old nurse raising up the fine hairs on the backside of my neck...

Professional nursing can be compared to a lifelong apprenticeship as there's always something new to be learned. You are a well educated nurse at the beginning of her chosen career. Emotions are part of this game. They are part of the hands on of health care. Emotions can keep us connected to ourselves and others. As you evolve in your nursing career, you will no doubt encounter other nurses that will try to manipulate you through your emotions. You will have situations where you absolutely must be alone in a private room with the door locked behind you before you can express a strong emotion safely. The odds of turning into an embittered old nurse will be less if you learn to accept, understand, and trust your emotions. Keep them private if needed, but don't deny them healthy expression. They are a part of being human. They help you understand yourself.

Think about it.

:icon_hug:

[medsurgrnco, BSN, RN]

It HURTS to have someone suggest you resign, and esp. as a new grad when you haven't had much experience in the field and understandably lack confidence. You were incredibly lucky in how you were treated, as the more typical experience is to be told you're a poor fit and to have managers tear you down.

Med/surg nursing is very stressful, for both new grads and for experienced nurses. And many nurses have difficulties dealing with the stress and the resultant emotions. You probably could not have hid how stressed you were, as it likely showed all over your face & body & in your interactions with others. I suggest that you not try to bottle up or hide your emotions, but instead work to develop improved coping skills for dealing with work stressors and challenges.

Psych nursing also can be quite stressful, tho in a different way from med/surg. Dealing with highly agitated, disoriented, and/or assaultive patients is challenging. Regarding odors, some psych patients are unkempt and need much encouragement in the hygiene area. On the plus side, you have worked as a MHW so that you have some idea of what you're getting into with this field.

I wish you well in your job search and in your new position.

[jeepgirl, LPN, NP]

don't do it! it was all a lie!

you don't need one year of med surg... it is NOT a requirement. its a lie someone made up to get more med-surg nurses... LOL!!

on a more serious note... there are nurses who love med surg and there are those who just... don't. find something else you are a better fit for... there is no requirement!