Lvn/lpn cover letter ok?

TheCommuter, BSN, RN · Apr 13, 2010

your cover letter is fine, but i highlighted a sentence by emboldening it with red because it is actually a sentence fragment. since the job market is so tight in your area, many prospective employers will trash a cover letter or resume if it contains even one grammatical error. therefore, my friendly suggestion is for you to make the correction before submitting it to any facility. good luck to you!

jane doe

anywhere lane, anywhere, usa 11111

cell: (000-444-5555)

email:

april 12, 2010

john doe, practical nurse administrator
anywhere health centers
anyplace main road
anywhere, usa, 11111

dear mr. doe:

i am writing in response to your ad published on/at for a full-time licensed vocational nurse. i believe that i can fill that position well due to my education, work experience, and professional sincerity. i display a positive attitude about myself and possess great communication skills.

a lvn graduate from the institute of medical education in san jose, ca. i currently hold a license in california.

my demonstrated strong organizational and communication skills derive from my successful employment experiences in hospitality, as my enclosed resume confirms. these skills, coupled with my lvn education and training, should prove to be of great benefit to your family health center.

i am confident that you will agree that my qualifications match your requirements for this position. therefore, i would greatly appreciate an opportunity to meet with you to fully reveal my keen interest in the health care field and to determine how i may fit your staff profile. i can be reached by e-mail, or cell phone days or evenings to arrange for an appointment. if i do not hear from you by monday, april 19, i will call your office to request a meeting at a time convenient to you or another member of your staff.

thank you for considering my application for employment at anywhere health centers.

sincerely,

(signature)
jane doe, lvn

enclosure: resume

( what do u guys think? just to start off, i wrote my first cover letter, now i'm onto writing a resume and then a thank you letter, & at last a jist card!!) btw- i don't know why my name wont appear in the middle after several edits lol. but on the real, cover letter on microsoft word looks perfect.

sweetmya · Apr 13, 2010

your cover letter is fine, but i highlighted a sentence by emboldening it with red because it is actually a sentence fragment. since the job market is so tight in your area, many prospective employers will trash a cover letter or resume if it contains even one grammatical error. therefore, my friendly suggestion is for you to make the correction before submitting it to any facility. good luck to you!

thank u. i was actually thinking about deleting that whole line. (2 sentences)

jane doe

1340 anywhere lane, anywhere, usa 11111

cell: (000-444-5555)

email: [email protected]

april 12, 2010

john doe, practical nurse administrator

anyone health centers

anywhere main road

anywhere, usa 00000

dear mr. doe:

i am writing in response to your ad published on/at for a full-time licensed vocational nurse. i believe that i can fill that position well due to my education, work experience, and professional sincerity. i display a positive attitude about myself and possess great communication skills.

my demonstrated strong organizational and communication skills derive from my successful employment experiences in hospitality, as my enclosed resume confirms. these skills, coupled with my lvn education and training, should prove to be of great benefit to your family health center.

i am confident that you will agree that my qualifications match your requirements for this position. therefore, i would greatly appreciate an opportunity to meet with you to fully reveal my keen interest in the health care field and to determine how i may fit your staff profile. i can be reached by e-mail, or cell phone days or evenings to arrange for an appointment. if i do not hear from you by monday, april 19, i will call your office to request a meeting at a time convenient to you or another member of your staff.

thank you for considering my application for employment at the anywhere health centers.

sincerely,

(signature)

jane doe, lvn

enclosure: resume

pagandeva2000, LPN · Apr 13, 2010

Friendly moderator reminder: I am asking that our members SERIOUSLY take internet safety into consideration. Posting personal addresses, email addresses for yourself or anyone else, as what was done in this resume can lead to serious circumstances where harm can come to yourselves or even the person whom is receiving this communication.

In addition, you never know...competition for the very position being aimed for may be posting in these same forums.

I altered the information but left the thread open because I do see that the OP is trying to get feedback on a job search...reaching out for support that the allnurses community can and do provide. But, please, proceed with absolute caution!

caliotter3 · Apr 13, 2010

I hope that cell phone number and address are made up. They look authentic.

caliotter3 · Apr 13, 2010

The OP still has the San Jose address and cell phone number. Dangerous.

sweetmya · Apr 14, 2010

The OP still has the San Jose address and cell phone number. Dangerous.

Yes, everything is fake!! Even the name of the hiring place and everything else. :)

sweetmya · Apr 14, 2010

Friendly moderator reminder: I am asking that our members SERIOUSLY take internet safety into consideration. Posting personal addresses, email addresses for yourself or anyone else, as what was done in this resume can lead to serious circumstances where harm can come to yourselves or even the person whom is receiving this communication.
In addition, you never know...competition for the very position being aimed for may be posting in these same forums.
I altered the information but left the thread open because I do see that the OP is trying to get feedback on a job search...reaching out for support that the allnurses community can and do provide. But, please, proceed with absolute caution!

Hi, thanks but everything I posted related to name, phone #, hiring place are all FAKE!! I made it all up. :)

OgopogoLPN, LPN, RN · Apr 15, 2010

I would change the wording in the first paragraph from "I believe"............that is weak wording. Your wording in the 3rd paragraph is much better "I am confident"........

Also, I've never heard of putting "If I don't hear from you by.............I will call your office...........". That come accross as very aggressive to me. Maybe it's common practice where you live, but I don't think I would like that if I were hiring manager. I would think to myself "who is she to presume to call me if I choose not to contact her by a certain date?"

Just my :twocents: . Best of luck on your job search. :nurse:

caliotter3 · Apr 15, 2010

I also would not use the "if you don't call me by insert date, I will call you" approach. I've seen it suggested many times in resume books and examples, but it seems too aggressive to me. Just contact them anyway. You don't need to warn them in the initial contact letter. JMO