Parents not supporting me but Im Starting Lvn program next month paying 800 a month!

Jules A, MSN · Sep 12, 2006

Parents who fail to provide financial information on FAFSAs or cosign for a dependent student with no credit history are, in my opinion, being selfish. It should be natural for class mobility to occur, and education is the quickest way for students from working-class families to move into the middle class.

Hey Commuter,

I truly commend you for seeing how important an education is and working toward one without emotional or financial support. I would disagree that your parents were being selfish, perhaps shortsighted but it sounds like they were only giving back to you what they knew with no malicious intention.

The thing about judging whether or not these parents are selfish is not clear cut, imo. Speaking from experience, my parents threw away quite a bit of money on my education first time around when all I wanted to do was party. Would they have been selfish or wise to have required me to straighten my priorities out first before they paid for school? I guess all I'm saying is that we don't know this person and the history, we don't know the parents and their issues. There are no easy answers I'm afraid. What I really wish is that in our great country, a continuing education opportunity was available to anyone qualified who wanted one but thats a whole other story. :wink2:

LydiaNN · Sep 12, 2006

In fairness to the parents, I think it would be interesting to know what the OP has been doing with his time and life since leaving high school. I have known parents who had kids that started college or technical school, dropped or failed out, and decided several years later that they'd like to try again. At that point, the parents, rightfully IMHO, were there for moral, but not financial, support. We all make choices in our life, and sometimes the consequences are financial in nature.

LaneRN · Jul 22, 2008

I am getting ready to start the LPN program at the community college where I live. We had orientation on July 15th , the first thing that was told to us was to only work 20 hours a week because the program took a lot of study time and committment I am not sying that working full time you can not do it because I am still planning on working at least 36 hours a week but was told if after the first test I had a failing grade it would be to my advantage to cut back on my hours because at our college you must maintain at least an 80 or 85 average in order to pass the classes in the nursing program and a c or better in the other courses that are required. If you do not you will be dismissed from the program. And it is avery hard program both LPN and the ADN to get into.

rnmomtobe2010 · Jul 24, 2008

I was in the same situation as you about seven years ago when I had just graduated from high school. I had been accepted to three California State Universities but my parents, thinking that I wasn't ready for college, refused to cosign any student loans. Therefore, I never went to the university and ended up working full-time at a series of dead-end jobs.
At age 20 I was hired as a factory worker and, for the first time in my life, earned decent money. I saved my money, built a good credit history, and was soon able to attend LVN school while living in a nice home of my own at age 23. Things have somewhat worked out for me, but I just wished that my parents valued education more. I also wished they would believe in my abilities instead of thinking that I'm not ready. I now live 1,400 miles away from Mom and Dad and don't regret my decision.
It is extremely difficult to work full-time while attending LPN/LVN school. It will be done if you want it badly enough, but it is a surprisingly difficult feat to accomplish. I collected unemployment checks and lived on my savings while going to school.

Congratulations...You have really inspired me... :yeah:

missjennmb · Jul 24, 2008

In order to get a grant I dont know what the specific amount you can make is but I know it is very low. My husband and I made around 19,000.00 the year I tried to get a grant and that was to much money to get any help at all. Someone told me they only allow like 8,000.00 per adult in the house hold to qualify for a grant if you dont have any children. I dont know how they expect you to be able to live and go to school on that amount of money.

You should get a second opinion. My family has an income of $39k for last year and I got enough pell grant to cover most of my tuition. I do have children, but you should still be able to get something.

As for those suggesting that parents are selfish for not cosigning for a loan for nursing school.... not trying to be harsh here or anything, but the cold hard truth is that LPN schools are graduating about HALF of the students that start each school year. HALF So that means about 50% of the students who took out all of those loans did not get a return on their investment. I have a teenage son, and while I would do anything in my power to help him succeed in life, and I feel that education is more important than practically anything else on the planet that he can do to give himself a good life.... I would not cosign for a loan for him to go to nursing school. I would, however, provide him room and board (and maybe even pay his car insurance/gas money) so that he could get a part time job and do it himself. If he got through the first half and showed a good effort I would consider signing for the second half if he found himself having trouble getting through, but not without him putting forth the effort first and proving to me that he was not going to be part of that 50%. My son is brilliant and can do great things when he applies himself, but its a tough program, and there's really no way to know if he would have the dedication necessary until he showed me that he did.

SPNbabe08 · Jul 24, 2008

ok. everyone please dont flame me for my post, im being honest, tactful and speaking from experience.

there was no way in hell my parents would have cosigned a school loan for me at 20. period. i lacked maturity, responsibility, work ethic, focus, determination. everything really. and i rented a room and worked my ass for 10yrs.

i also didnt have the desire to go. so why should they put themselves outthere for me. my mom and Sdad have worked really really hard for what they have. i wouldnt have gambeled it on me either.

now at 30, im starting LPN school. i married a great guy( who is a LPN), we own our home. and we work our buts off. my mom offered to cosign for me. its a 10k loan. she offered becuase shes watched me grow up and face life. not so great at times. but thru it all shes seen something that makes her comfortable a to cosign for me. she even told me the other day that she wants to becuase she wants to help me get my credit rating back up there.

you sound really angry at your parents for not cosigning for you and making you go it on your own. but i believe theyre right. theyre teaching you to be self-sufficient and do it on your own. and when you get there you can hold your head up and say that you did it on your own. thats pride and only comes when you are determined and do it.

HeyHeyitsMaay · Jul 28, 2008

You need to ask your school about petitioning to be considered an independent student. Your school makes the final decision. But, the way it works is that because you have no children and are not married, you have to use your parents income information to be able to qualify for standard government loans. When you give your reasons for wanting to be classified as independent, the school will look at them and decide if they want to allow you to be independent for FA reasons. Hurry up and do this before it gets too close to school. Call them now and ask about it.

As for what's called 'gap' loans, (sallie mae) they have very high interest, but if you're single and won't be qualified as independent, they may be the way to go. The only problem with those is that you have to have stellar credit and probably won't qualify for one.

Ask your school about being classified as independent. Hopefully it'll work out!