Losing Confidence

indigo girl · Jul 31, 2006

Does any other nurse here feel like they are losing confidence in their skills? I always feel stupid lately, and feel that I just can't do it anymore. I think I'm going to bow out of patient care, because I'm so scared that I'll make a mistake with horrible consequences one day. It's a paralyzing fear...and it's making me a bad nurse, clinically. I don't even know what I would do if I harmed someone (unintentionally, of course). I know we're all human and make mistakes, but this profession is scary.

Well, it can be frightening at times when you are out of your comfort zone, but you can't learn if you don't do. You don't say what your area of practice is or how long you've been doing it. Give us some more info, and maybe we can help you by suggesting coping mechanisms, ways to learn things, or even other areas to work in that might be a better fit for you. I really believe, if you got thru boards and nursing school that there is a niche for you. Please tell us more about you, and why you feel this way.

Irishgirl · Jul 31, 2006

I left the ER after four years there. I did well, and the staff was like a second family. I've changed over to nursing research, which is what I've always wanted to do. But, I do have OCD, and always have this deep fear that I did something wrong. I wake up thinking of another thing I could have done that could harm a patient, but a normal person wouldn't do this. If I exhaust one possibility, I find another. I'm on Wellbutrin, and go to therapy, but it's undermined my confidence so much. I'm so petrified of making a mistake, that I forget basics, am scared to do things on my own without someone checking them, and I make dumb mistakes (not harmful at all) and I blow them out of proportion in my head. I'm not working clinically anymore, and the OCD helps me in research, which I'm doing well in, because I'm very particular and I recheck everything. This is KILLING me. I'm a mess, my life isn't what it should be.

meownsmile, BSN, RN · Jul 31, 2006

I think we all go through periods where our confience and our self doubt take over and make us wonder what the heck were doing there. Please dont give up though and maybe next week will be better. Just try to slow down at work a bit, take the extra time to double check yourself, think about things and dont let yourself get distracted.

And if nothing else,, a couple days of stress leave isnt necissarily out of the question. Maybe you need to call off for a couple days to get yourself together and take care of you.

gitterbug · Jul 31, 2006

If your facility offers employee assistance, please attempt to obtain some

confidential stress counselling. The very fact you recognize the fear, how it is effecting your job and practice is going to work in your favor. Please, do not think this is something no other nurse goes through. I know I have had to make some tough decisions about what I really like to do and how I want to do it. Good luck.

SophiaRN · Jul 31, 2006

I too have struggled with OCD tendencies, particularly when starting a new job. I can truly sympathize with you. The checking & rechecking everything can make you feel crazy!! The thing that has helped me most is Paxil.

Irishgirl · Aug 1, 2006

I think I'll go back on my Lexapro. I just know that I'm in the business of healing and when I do something that in my mind may cause harm, it freaks me out. I started a 22 g IV for a nurse in an outpatient area so she can finish transfusing blood, there was only a little left to infuse. Now I'm worried because I started a 22, and the blood will hemolyze. Is this too little to worry about? Has anyone else done that on an adult before?

Antikigirl, ASN, RN · Aug 1, 2006

I typically find myself loosing confidence in two situations...a new place, or closing in on a burn out!

What I try to do is make myself go back to the basics! Really thinking before I do anything, illiciting help from fellow nurses, and taking care of myself outside of work. If I am nearing a burn out...stress leave so I can get back on track!

I was running into this quite often a year or so ago, and went to my PCP to let him know that I was stressing out to the point of shakes, couldn't concentrate, and was starting to drink on my days off (just starting and thankfully that scared me and my family...so I immediately called my MD!).

He told me that a new Dx for healthcare providers is comming called "Caregiver Stress" and hopefully will be a really big one with research and help that is covered by insurance and lots of support (to the point that facilities will have to have support systems in place by law!). And lucky for me he had done lots of research in this himself since he himself was suffering from it, his nurses and other healthcare professional pts he has!

After a long and frankly embarresing look into me, we chose a low dose paxil...which I will say has done WONDERS for me (for me, not necessarily for everyone). I am on the ball again, feeling so much better, not depressed...and started up my journals again that really help me to focus on the good/bad/ugly of this profession and most times..pat myself on the back for doing the right thing (cause you do forget your sucesses when you are running on empty or down and out).

Good luck to you, and you may want to start up communications with your PCP about other things you can do to help illeviate some of the stressors in your life, and things you can do to confidence build (me it is journaling).

Take care, and good luck!