I'm in the last semester of a two year ASN program and I feel totally defeated. All of my test scores this semester have been good (my class average is 89%) except for the ATI comprehensive which said that I have a 49% chance of passing the N-CLEX. I generally do bad on ATI tests, but this was the worst I've ever done. Furthmore, I absolutely suck at clinical. All of my classmates are flying through their days and look extremely confident while it takes me forever to do EVERYTHING and I look like a nervous wreck the entire time. I have extremely bad anxiety and I always feel that is transitioning into my work. Since I apparently am so far off from passing the N-CLEX and I'm still horrible at clinical even though I'm a senior, I feel like this might have been a mistake. I've always dreamed of being someone who is competent and confident. That is what actually drew me to nursing-I admired how smart and assertive nurses are. But I'm starting to feel like since I'm not confident and I'm bad at being assertive, maybe I'm not going to be a good nurse.
I kinda feel like all my instructors hate me too. I'm 20 and I don't work because my parents support me, but I'm the only one in my class who struggles with clinical and school. I feel like they think I'm some spoiled kid who doesn't care about nursing because I'm doing bad and I'm so anxious, it doesn't look like I'm enjoying working with people.
Honestly, I have 2 months left till graduation and I'm scared for my future. Will I pass the boards? And if I pass, then what? Will I even be good? I absolutely love watching and helping experienced nurses work, but when I do it (and mess up), I feel miserable. I'm kinda just venting here, but I'd appreciate any advice.
Give yourself a chance. You can try to observe what makes others fast and efficient on doing things in their clinicals. But if I may suggest you can try positive thinking ,coz I think it reflects on what your doin and if your grades are good ...you can become good too in clinicals and ATI..
You're going to doubt yourself until you pass the boards, and then it's typically 16 months for a new nurse to feel confident.
We have all been there, I always joke that nursing school was the worst best choice I ever made...lol, man it sucked. And it was the most competitive nonsense too- dude, we all made it into the program, work together....ugh.
Give yourself 2 years after boards...you're going to make mistakes, feel inadequate, question the career choice, and panic about most everything....breath, we have all been there! *hug*
Much like you, standardized tests killed me...I took every question on the boards. EVER. DAMN. QUESTION. 5 hrs....I was DEFEATED. I passed, and I've been playing nurse for a little over 5 yrs and love it! However, I think I love it because I'm in the speciality I am....no way could I do adults.
Nursing is a unique situation. On the one hand, our gut feelings can help us react quickly to a patient's decline, emphasize more readily with others, etc. On the other, when we're nervous or unsure, it compounds the stress we experience and negatively impacts our self-perception. It sounds like your feelings about yourself and your performance are getting the better of you, when in fact it sounds like you are a conscientious and capable student.
First, put on blinders to the other students. They are not you; you only have to make sure YOU become a nurse that you're proud to be. Don't give another thought to how anyone else is doing. Instead, ask yourself, "Am *I* comfortable with this concept or skill? What do *I* need to master this?" Identify where you are and what it will take for you to feel confident in a particular subject. Break it down; nursing is easier in small pieces. I promise everything will start fitting together.
I remember feeling like an absolute dimwit during all of my clinicals at some point - not to mention the anxiety of the first few months at any new job. Some of it is the inevitable learning curve, but I still create a lot of my own problems by being worried. We panic bunnies can still survive and thrive as nurses, lol, but we need to catch ourselves in the act and refocus on actual nursing. As long as you are humble about what you know and are eager to learn, you'll be all right. It takes time and experience to develop confidence, which it's surprisingly hard to get while in school. Your whole knowledge base will grow exponentially once you're in a job, and you WILL feel better about this. Hang in there!
Sounds like you want internet people to validate what you're going through.
No, you won't be a good nurse
Yes, you will be a good nurse.
What I say doesn't matter, it's all up to you. Nursing school breaks you down, but not enough. You'll have tougher days on the unit. The choice comes down to your abilities and your desire to "be a good nurse".
You will have areas you're great at, you'll have areas your safe at, and you'll have areas you'll improved. You've almost made it through nursing school. You don't need our accolades to be better. You need some faith in your abilities and the fact that you won't know everything when you hit the floor. That's okay.
I want to update you on my progress and thank you for your kind suggestions. I took the NCLEX for the first time yesterday and passed in 75 questions!!! I thought for sure I failed since the first ATI comprehensive predictor I took said I had a 46% chance of passing. The second time I took the predictor I had a 86% chance of passing, but I still felt like I wasn’t good enough bc all my classmates got above 90%.
In prepping for the NCLEX, I used both Hurst and UWorld. I heard that although Hurst’s content review is great, it’s practice questions were not that difficult, so I used UWorld’s question bank. I studied both Hurst and UWorld for the past two months. In all honesty, I think UWorld is the main reason I passed. Even though Hurst’s content review was superb, I feel like I relied a lot more on the test taking strategies I learned from practicing UWorld questions than the content I reviewed with Hurst.
On another note, I’m starting therapy pretty soon to help manage my anxiety. My whole journey through nursing school has helped me realize that I am smart enough and passionate enough to be a nurse but my anxiety is preventing me from expressing myself properly and l makes me hypercritical of myself. I mentioned in my first post that I thought all my professors hated me, but when they found out I passed they congratulated me and told me the would give me job references. This whole time all my worries were distortions of reality caused from my anxiety.
I hope a nursing student who is struggling with school and/or anxiety will read this and realize there is hope. If you work hard, you can do well in school, pass the NCLEX, and become a great nurse. If I did it, so can you.
Newuser18
1 Post
Give yourself a chance. You can try to observe what makes others fast and efficient on doing things in their clinicals. But if I may suggest you can try positive thinking ,coz I think it reflects on what your doin and if your grades are good ...you can become good too in clinicals and ATI..