Is giving emotional support draining for you?

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Specializes in Family Nurse Practitioner.

I find it very draining. My patients drain me and make me feel uncomfortable sometimes because I really want to get away and not listen. I like making them feel better and I don't mind being supportive but at some point I want to run away. I am good at listening and being sympathetic and my patients really seem to like me. What do I do about this?

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Specializes in Pediatrics, Emergency, Trauma.

When you say that you are sympathetic; it makes me think that this is when the "emotional draining" comes in; I think being empathetic-meaning, listening and trying to see the pts perspective objectively-is an art that can be perfected:

-establish boundaries when discussing their challenges; understand your limitations and theirs and aim for the NOW; the focus is the time period spent as nurse-pt interaction to ensure a termination of the relationship when you end your shift.

-check your own emotions when first encounter your pts; do you want to do your "all" with them-meaning are you becoming emotionally involved with the pt, possibly blurring the lines of the nurse-pt relationship?

You also may be leading yourself to burnout and compassion fatigue, so realize you have to exercise self care as well; find ways to be recharged in order to leave work at work.

Here's an excellent resource for compassion fatigue:

http://www.nursingworld.org/MainMenuCategories/ANAMarketplace/ANAPeriodicals/OJIN/TableofContents/Vol-16-2011/No1-Jan-2011/Countering-Compassion-Fatigue.html

Best wishes.

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Specializes in Gerontology RN-BC and FNP MSN student.

Go to the peaceful place in your mind and smile......until you can gracefully remove yourself from the situation. You maintain tact, politeness and save your sanity.

There is an art to keeping your sanity while helping others. It gets easier the more you do it. :yes:

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Specializes in Critical Care; Cardiac; Professional Development.

I do fine until it becomes obvious the patient isn't really interested in feeling better and/or is manipulating me. Then I do actually excuse myself. I don't have time or get paid enough to be an emotional dumping ground.

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Specializes in Family Nurse Practitioner.
When you say that you are sympathetic; it makes me think that this is when the "emotional draining" comes in; I think being empathetic-meaning, listening and trying to see the pts perspective objectively-is an art that can be perfected:

-establish boundaries when discussing their challenges; understand your limitations and theirs and aim for the NOW; the focus is the time period spent as nurse-pt interaction to ensure a termination of the relationship when you end your shift.

-check your own emotions when first encounter your pts; do you want to do your "all" with them-meaning are you becoming emotionally involved with the pt, possibly blurring the lines of the nurse-pt relationship?

You also may be leading yourself to burnout and compassion fatigue, so realize you have to exercise self care as well; find ways to be recharged in order to leave work at work.

Here's an excellent resource for compassion fatigue:

Countering Compassion Fatigue: A Requisite Nursing Agenda

Best wishes.

Thanks, that was very helpful!

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Specializes in Family Nurse Practitioner.
Go to the peaceful place in your mind and smile......until you can gracefully remove yourself from the situation. You maintain tact, politeness and save your sanity.

There is an art to keeping your sanity while helping others. It gets easier the more you do it. :yes:

I like that...the peaceful place...

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Specializes in Family Nurse Practitioner.
I do fine until it becomes obvious the patient isn't really interested in feeling better and/or is manipulating me. Then I do actually excuse myself. I don't have time or get paid enough to be an emotional dumping ground.

I am actually pretty good with manipulative patients. I have no patience for them and I usually catch on pretty quickly that they are manipulating me and I just don't put up with it.

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Specializes in Med-Surg.

YES.

Even when it's patients that I want to sympathize with, that really tug my heart strings, it's draining.

Worse is pretending to be empathetic to manipulative or dramatic patients/family members.

How can I care about a 29 year old woman wailing over her lap chole with her mother screaming for a cola when I have a dear 48 year old woman just diagnosed with terminal, painful cancer next door and NO family at bedside?

...

It's just really difficult. I have been feeling the burn out more and more the past few weeks. After my third shift in a week I feel emotionally empty. When I am on autopilot I come off as very compassionate, empathetic, ect... I just don't feel it anymore. Sometimes I think my heart starts each week out with a certain amount of compassion. As that drains it doesn't always refill, and I'm left running on empty.

I advise you to decompress somehow. I vent to my family. I read books to escape reality.

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Specializes in NICU, PICU, Transport, L&D, Hospice.

It is draining...for pretty much everyone who does this.

This is where I mention professional boundaries again and again.

And then I talk about self care and having a place to fill up the emotional bucket that you just emptied in the care of sick, desperate, and sometimes dying people.

Good luck. Don't stop helping your patients, just remember to keep something in the bucket.

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