I'm too sensitive, says my husband

CamillusRN, BSN · May 1, 2015

Thanks everyone---side note--my husband only said dental hygienist because I had been considering that at one point---I like the analogy of walking barefooted and playing the musical instrument, that's a great way of looking at it

I've come across some pretty rude dental patients - thick skin will be necessary in any field that puts you in contact with people day in and day out. Plus, some people have breath that would make anyone cry :barf02:

Raven Sierra, BSN, RN · May 1, 2015

I was once an easy crier as well. Working in journalism and healthcare grew a thick skin for me. Compartmentalizing is key, and it's a learned skill, just like starting an IV or inserting a NG tube. It doesn't mean you're not a compassionate person anymore; it's a survival mechanism and a sanity-saver. You can have compassion without becoming emotionally wrapped up in a patient.

That's not to say that healthcare professionals don't cry or don't have a few patients that "never leave" - that is, they remember forever. And I have cried in a supply closet. But I wipe my tears off, take several calming breaths, and go back out there. It's not weakness to cry; it's what you do afterward. Are you a basketcase for the rest of the shift? Or are you able to move on?

Dental hygienists seem to have a nice gig. I've known a few, and they had great hours, no holidays, good pay...not a bad deal. :up: It really depends on what you want. Best of luck to you, whatever you choose!

JanaAkers · May 1, 2015

I completely understand where you are coming from. I am also working on my pre-reqs and will be starting the actual nursing program this fall. I am/was ultrasensitive as well, I even used to cry watching TV commercials! I remember last year when I was doing my CNA clinicals in the memory care unit of a LTC. I had to step out for thirty minutes to cry and pull myself together. Working with those sweet souls just about broke my heart and I really didn't think I would be able to survive in this field. I eventually got a job in that same facility in the rehab unit. My skin has definitely thickened, but I still have to take a time-out every now and then. Being sensitive is a trait that I have learned to love about myself. I can recognize when a resident is in emotional distress and I am able to stop for a moment, hold their hands and cry with them. I have only been doing this for seven months and I have toughened up a lot. I know by the time you and I get through nursing school we will be tough as nails! :up:

crj96 · May 2, 2015

I have a very thin skin as well, but time and experience has helped me to not get too wrapped up in my patients. I have absolutely had patients that will stick with me forever, and some that I wish I could get a do-over with. But, for the most part, I've learned that I can only care so much before they have to pick it up and run with it. I can help them to make the right choices, but I can't make them for them. My job is to give them the best care that I know how, in the time I'm with them.

Now where I have really struggled is with my interaction with other nurses. When I came out of nursing school, I was very idealistic and sensitive to criticism from other people. What I've learned in the very short time I've been a nurse is that idealism is a good thing, but it's best to keep it to yourself. My patients know that I want the best for them, but other nurses can perceive this as weakness and they're not all very nice about it. I will not, however, allow anyone to take the sensitive out of me. It may make me vulnerable, but it's also what allows me to connect with my patients.

Ruby Vee, BSN · May 7, 2015

thanks everyone for the feedback---I work in the medical field, just not clinical, I am constantly thinking about my patients when I go home---again thanks everyone

Constantly thinking about your patients when you go home is a bad thing. You need to be able to separate your work life from your home life. If you're always all in a tizzy about your patients, you can't take care of you.

Being a "very compassionate person" is one thing. "Crying at the drop of a hat" is another. You will need to be able to hold it together in a clinical setting. I can tell you first hand that it's hell for the patient with the new cancer diagnosis to have to make the clinician feel better about having to discuss the diagnosis. When I'm the patient, the important emotions are mine.

Contrary to what seems to be popular belief here, you don't really have to be a compassionate person to be a nurse. You can fake that. What you need to be is competent, and that cannot be faked.