I'm devastated

I need some advice - hope some of you have been there and can help! I'll try to keep this as compact as possible. I am my Dad's Health Care Proxy. He is 84 year ols. He has Parkinsons (advanced) - very symptomatic. Confused and disoriented at times. After taking a close look at his labs, found he had an elevated BUN and creatinine. Took him to a nephrologist and had renal ultrasound done - showed hydronephrosis. Took him to a urologist for bladder ultrasound, bladder was full. MD gave him the option of a suprapubic catheter placement or letting nature take its course. So - if he has the catheter placed - he cannot stay at the assisted living facility due to restrictions involving assisted living residences. But if I decide not to have the catheter placed - he will further compromise his kidney function - possibly putting him in a position of having to be dialzyed. Dad currently resides in an assisted living facility (that I am very happy with - after signing him out of a nursing home AMA) OR - I can elect not to do anything and let nature take its course. I know my Dad would not want to be kept alive mechanically, vented (etc), but this - I don't know. The urologist told me that he has a dual problem - BPH and rigidity caused by the Parkinsons on his sphincter muscle. It's tough having to make these kind of decisions for a loved one - I have been very depressed over this - would appreciate hearing from anyone that has been in a similar situation. Thanks so much. God Bless.

gambro....l don't know what to tell you but l just had to tell you how very sorry l am. Dialysis is a huge compromise, seems to take it's toll on ppl and obviously without it would become very ill, suprapubic catheter placement seems relatively simple by comparison and therefore may help quality of life, which at this point is probably more of an issue than length of life....hopefully someone with more exp can help you with this....hugs and prayers to you and your dad...........LR

gambro....l don't know what to tell you but l just had to tell you how very sorry l am. Dialysis is a huge compromise, seems to take it's toll on ppl and obviously without it would become very ill, suprapubic catheter placement seems relatively simple by comparison and therefore may help quality of life, which at this point is probably more of an issue than length of life....hopefully someone with more exp can help you with this....hugs and prayers to you and your dad...........LR

Originally posted by l.rae

gambro....l don't know what to tell you but l just had to tell you how very sorry l am. Dialysis is a huge compromise, seems to take it's toll on ppl and obviously without it would become very ill, suprapubic catheter placement seems relatively simple by comparison and therefore may help quality of life, which at this point is probably more of an issue than length of life....hopefully someone with more exp can help you with this....hugs and prayers to you and your dad...........LR

gambro-

i agree with what my evil twin said...

IMHO: dialysis sucks and is not a way a loved gentleman of his age should live out the remaining time he has left on this earth...definately would not add quality of life...superpubic caths are cake in comparison....this of course based on what you have posted as to your choices...

would Dad qualify for a SNF, as opposed to the ALF in which he resides now?

Originally posted by l.rae

gambro....l don't know what to tell you but l just had to tell you how very sorry l am. Dialysis is a huge compromise, seems to take it's toll on ppl and obviously without it would become very ill, suprapubic catheter placement seems relatively simple by comparison and therefore may help quality of life, which at this point is probably more of an issue than length of life....hopefully someone with more exp can help you with this....hugs and prayers to you and your dad...........LR

gambro-

i agree with what my evil twin said...

IMHO: dialysis sucks and is not a way a loved gentleman of his age should live out the remaining time he has left on this earth...definately would not add quality of life...superpubic caths are cake in comparison....this of course based on what you have posted as to your choices...

would Dad qualify for a SNF, as opposed to the ALF in which he resides now?

Originally posted by sunnygirl272

gambro-

i agree with what my evil twin said...

IMHO: dialysis sucks and is not a way a loved gentleman of his age should live out the remaining time he has left on this earth...definately would not add quality of life...superpubic caths are cake in comparison....this of course based on what you have posted as to your choices...

would Dad qualify for a SNF, as opposed to the ALF in which he resides now? [/quote

EVIL......me:chair:

Originally posted by sunnygirl272

gambro-

i agree with what my evil twin said...

IMHO: dialysis sucks and is not a way a loved gentleman of his age should live out the remaining time he has left on this earth...definately would not add quality of life...superpubic caths are cake in comparison....this of course based on what you have posted as to your choices...

would Dad qualify for a SNF, as opposed to the ALF in which he resides now? [/quote

EVIL......me:chair:

Originally posted by l.rae

EVIL......me:chair:

well...I certainly can't be the evil one....

Originally posted by l.rae

EVIL......me:chair:

well...I certainly can't be the evil one....

What does he want to do?

I support the two of you in whatever decision you chose to make. However, I have one question. Would not medicare pay for admission to facility with higher level of care in case of a superpubic cath?