I need to switch preceptors

Been there,done that, ASN, RN · Jul 25, 2011

Deeeeep breaths... it will be ok.

The unit/facility must have some basic guidelines for new nurse orientation. FIND the policy. It is NOT acceptible to take patients during your first week(s) of orientation.

Even though your manager is on vacation, someone is covering their duties. Speak with that person and Human Resources.

Don't quit until you have the answers you deserve. Approach other staff nurses and find out the routine for orientaion from them.

I can't tell exactly what has gone wrong here, but you need a knowledgeable person in the facility to assist you.

Where is nursing education? Get their assistance, also.

Good luck. PM me anytime.

Ivanna_Nurse, BSN, RN · Jul 25, 2011

Ive been there... hang in there. No two nurses are alike, and some may precept differently than others. Stop in and see your manager, touch base with her and let her know how much you enjoyed your alternate preceptor. You are not the first person to feel anxious, belittled or overwhelmed, and you telling your boss you would like someone else will not make the world stop turning. :redbeathe You always have support here, Ivanna

Miller86 · Jul 25, 2011

I would attempt to talk with your preceptor first. Let her know all the concerns you're having and that you need time to adjust and learn. She may not know exactly what you are or not comfortable with, you need to be quite clear with her as this is your time to learn and absorb as much as possible.

If that does not work, then you absolutely need to speak with your manager and switch preceptors. When I first started working, I shadowed the first shift and picked up 2-3 patients on the second/third shift (to my own comfort level). She is not able to read your mind, you need to let her know how you feel!

Best of luck:D And it's okay to feel overwhelmed when you're a newbie...

katygw · Jul 25, 2011

thank you for the adivce...it helps when I get input from fellow nurses. there is a nurse supervisor to contact while my manager is out...I guess I should talk to her...its funny because I even asked my not so great preceptor tonight where her office was and she said "why do you need to see her?" I smoothly said I needed to get a key for access to nurse servers on the floor and to ask about paperwork, Im sure this girl knew something was up and that she better get ready to stop me. I did just email my manager though saying I have concerns that I want to discuss with her as soon as possible (sorry youre on vaca but you need to know!). How should I start that discussion though? Do I walk in saying "my orientation isnt going so smoothly and I have concerns about the preceptor I am working with" and go from there? I mean how do I say it without throwing the bad preceptor under the bus...but at the same time I need to make my concerns known..either way I cant work with her-thats the bottom line.

katygw · Jul 25, 2011

I hear you miller but I already tried asking her if I could just go along with her for the later part of the shift and she said no I want you to have patients, we can try that tomorrow, and you already did that the first day (which is a lie)...even if she did accomodate to me I still just flat out dont feel comfortable with her...I have to go on my gut with this one..sorry

Florence NightinFAIL, BSN, RN · Jul 25, 2011

I'm sorry you had that experience. I know some nurses love precepting just so that they have someone doing their work for them...and that really sucks for new nurses/grads.

When she is precepting you - don't just rely on her for help/questions - ask the other nurses too. YOU are part of a team now - so utilize that.

Miller86 · Jul 25, 2011

Then you definitely need to speak with your manager. Are you scheduled shifts this week too? Speak to who ever is covering for her rather than waiting until August 2nd!

I hope everything works out for you.

Start off like that and hopefully your manager can provide you with a better preceptor (perhaps the one you had on the second day?). It's about your learning needs and what will benefit you in this new job of yours so don't stress about throwing her under the bus, she's already put you there on the first day.

Best of luck:D

Sehille4774 · Jul 25, 2011

Don't quit. You can do this!

First, know this. Some people who end up as preceptors just are not good in the 'teaching' role. Some that end up doing it are roped into it when they really don't like it...and these are the preceptors that tend to fit the description of the nurse you were with on day 1.

But sometimes it is just not a good fit with your personality/learning style and your manager should understand that.

Her approach seems alot like an old school approach that some nurses have...its bullying in a way. Throw you out there and you will either sink or swim..or throw as much at you as they can and if you are still standing then you will be stronger for it.

You and I both know their are other, kinder, teaching methods....and I feel that the learning process in greatly hindered when you in being bullied like that.

She also seems like the type that is TRYING to get under your skin and they get enjoyment from watching you squirm so..heh...i try not to show that vulnerable side because once people see that their tactics are not going to get to you, they give up..

Yeah I had some precepting experiences from Hell! I have learned to become a very good independent learner for just in case I end up in that situation in a new job that is not a very supportive environment.

Find out who the people are on that unit that are understanding and you can go to with questions, if you end up staying.

Good luck!

katygw · Jul 25, 2011

Thanks everyone, already woke up crying knowing that I have to work with her again. My manager replied to my email and said we can meet as soon as she gets back but in the mean time to contact the other woman filling in if my concerns are immediate, which they are. I am calling the other woman soon, when I can pull myself together, and ask to schedule a private meeting with her for maybe even today. I just feel I cant go in today, I feel like I'd rather die than go in and work with her again, I feel like I would feel so happy if I just said I quit (even though shed be happy about that but I dont even care). I feel slow, stupid, and incompetent around her. I make a bunch of mistakes and just feel Ill never get this if I stay with her. I would love to work with the other nurse I had but Ill take anyone else, ANYONE at this point. put me on a different shift even, I dont care just get me the hell out of there. This whole experience of starting work is scary already for a new grad like me and its the "cherry on top" *sarcasm* that I have to work with someone like this...I just know that whatever happens, I am not working with her for the whole period of training...hopefully by this week after speaking with the supervisor on hand, something can be worked out or I seriously feel like calling in sick if they need me to stay with her for a little longer before someone else is given to me. I already had doubts about nursing and they increase ten fold with every day I have to do this with this girl....thank you for you kind words and support, please pray that this meeting today goes well and that it can be fixed within the week or even today.

xtxrn, ASN, RN · Jul 25, 2011

Just keep in mind :) every new nurse (if they have any sense - lol) is overwhelmed :)

I hope the meeting goes well- and that you can get through the orientation period, and learn your own routine for how to get things done. It makes a difference to be able to work within your own organizational system. Plus, just being new is major stress- hang in !

Just curious- what had you doubting nursing? :nurse:

:up: You can do this :)

Gold_SJ · Jul 25, 2011

You can do it! Try not to give up you're going to be a brilliant nurse I'm sure. Everyone's uncertain nervous and frankly at times terrified in their new graduate year. Well I certainly was.

The sort of preceptoring of hers is rather throw you out there and see if you can swim, (in our facility med/surg must give you three weeks as an extra, so shadowing or taking on the load is something you work on in that period to iron out the kinks. That and our pt load is 10 with an EEN assist) maybe she has been watching you carefully and thinking she's helping you grow in confidence and independance and it's worked (in her opinion) for others she's preceptored. As I believe she figures she'll step in before anything major could happen, but at the same time for most I'd think that's a horrible way to learn due to that tension and stress.

When I did my first half of my grad in med/surg I felt so lost and overwhelmed, I had the days crying or the nights staying back charting, I was lucky however as I was given two preceptors who I rotated between. One a sweet gentle woman, who was happy for me to do whatever I was comfortable with. The other more outgoing, confident and advocating. She intimidated me as I'm the shy type so didn't talk much and she didn't seem to understand I was naturally this way. So told me once my personality isn't there. (Which upset me at the time lol) But both together the mix was a good experience. My confident preceptor finally found I was quite open and chatty in small groups 1-2 and was suprised at how many opinions I actually had So she retracted her statement.

You'll find things much better when you get to know more staff and have others to support you. Particularly too when you know the basic routine and get a hold of the dreaded time management in the area you are. Med/surg can be ridiculously heavy.

I'll send you my prayers ok for your meeting and hope you move on to a more empathic preceptor, but do your best not to alienate your former one. As often people precepting are because they do have great skills to share even if in their own rough and brash manner. Which can cause pain or stress if taken personally. A bad fit may be a good way to word things to this manager if you truly think there can be no reconciliation (at this point), could say you respect her but you feel unsupported and unable to verbalise your concerns as she doesn't take them seriously?

I'm really not sure, I don't know this lady so can't judge, she may be a battleaxe wearied and preceptored out (some people are dumped with preceptee after preceptee), or completely new to it but it's always best to say good things you like about a person as well as the problems, else it can sound rather disrespectful. After all no doubt she's very talented if she's been given a preceptoring role and there would be a lot you could learn from her. If her people skills are dead awful, just take note 'not' to learn those if they do mediation or there's no other option at this point.

Also don't put yourself down either, you don't want people to think badly of you and it's normal to feel overwhelmed, not yet time managing and disconnected in your postgrad on the start out this can last for six months, so don't stress you'll pick everything up and be great!

^.^ Just give yourself time to grow, no one steps in the door knowing everything, and we never do, there's always more to know. But you will grow confident, be able to advocate, feel part of a team and know you're giving good competent care it just is a process.

Wishing you all the best!

Hope your postgrad continues into something lovely.