so I did it because I had to

Please don't get discouraged. I think there are plenty of us with similar situations where we think we too much on our plate and actually that's why we chose the long distance route because there just isn't enough time in the day/week to go to a regular in class school. I kept putting it off but I finally took the first test which wasn't as bad as I thought it would be and then from there it was a breeze now I am just waiting for the CPNE. I think anxiety, timing etc... gets in the way but once you do it you will be so happy you did. The money you will make as an RN compared to LPN is worth it plus you have so many more job options.

What I did was register and schedule the exam so that I had a date/goal in mind to shoot for. As soon as I would get home from a test I would register for the next one. You have proven that you are a strong person to other people now you need to prove it to yourself. You take care of everyone else now it is your turn. If you don't have the encouragement from home you have it here. There are many of us that will give you those words when you feel like you just can't get through the next hurdle. Like I said I think most of us have been there and have had the help from others and we would like to do the same for you.

So, get that pot of coffee going and crack the books open;).

BJ

Not to criticize you, but why are you with this guy? Can you and your kids move in with your folks for a nominal rent while you do this?

If he's a good guy, excuse my comments.

thank you so much bj.....I have lost all of my friends as well so those words are very few and far between...I appreciate the encouragement.

he was a good guy...and deep down is a good guy but he just got to a place in his life where it was too much to handle and he snapped....I just don't know that I can wait around for him to go back to being a nice guy...ya know....it's a lot to deal with. My parents aren't too keen on the kids and I moving back...we were there for a while before moving in w/ my bf....so...that's not an option.

Well, then you are where you are for now.

Schedule the exams and pay for the practice exams. Just bang them out. The reading is the killer but you just need to lug whichever tome it is with you and get the reading in.

Hang tough. I take the boards tomorrow and I was getting weepy reading through this forum today. It was a long road, but it's been worth it.

How old are the kids?

7 1/2 b and almost 6 g.....I have huge guilt about the time I'm "not" spending doing something w/ them

Well, the guilt, I can't fix.

What shift do you work? Maybe you can incorporate your study time with their home work time at the dining room table.

?

I go to work after I drop them off at school and then pick them up when they get off the bus. I'm just going to have to figure out how to manage the time after they go to bed....I guess I feel like I'm doing what I'm supposed to be but since I failed a traditional program I'm not sure If I'm measuring up.

You measure up just fine.

I got A's in everything except nursing classes, in which they would FIND ways to knock my grade down. Went to EC and graduated with a 3.75.

Don't you worry about how you measure up.

I don't think you are prepared at this point to make any changes with home, family etc... so you have to work around what you are doing for now. Once you are done and have invested the sweat and tears you will have more confidence, more money and in a better place to make the changes. Trust me, schedule the first test!! take it and see how you feel. Once you are done with the first one you will have the momentum to keep going. I think my final push came when another nurse I work with who breaks out a sweat just talking to an MD passed the CPNE I thought to myself ok I really need to get my stuff in gear. YOU CAN DO IT!!!

momofqc, I know life can suck at times, but is what makes us who we truely are. I had just started my program with EC, had 3 kids, husband, full time job and the man i was married to for 20years, came home one day and proceeded to tell me, he had to "go find himself", he had been in the military and just retired at 37yo, and "he was lost":bluecry1::bluecry1: Well isnt that a crying shame. Here I am with kids,work and husband, who by the way, still hasnt found himself :uhoh3: That being 8 yrs ago, I restarted 18 months ago and just finished the cpne a month ago. By the way, I have a new husband who is awesome and supportive :yeah::yeah:so just work like heck, you have an excellent goal, all of our prayers are with you and know we are all just a click away, if you need anything. (((hugs))) donna

momofqc,

You really need to ask yourself, is the person I'm with lifting me up, or bringing me down? It doesn't sound like he is in anyway asset. It is much, much harder to get to the top of the mountain, when you are dragging a deadbeat behind you. Get rid of the dead weight. You will fill much lighter without it. Sorry if I am coming across as "******" or hard, but waaaay too many women put up with men, that are not worth the effort. It should be 50/50. Wishing you much luck and success, you are already getting there, lots of people would never have made it off the couch. Pat yourself on the back. You have true grit and determination. It takes a whole lot more to stand up on your own two legs, with someone pulling you down, than it is to stand up with alot of support. You will come out on top, winners always do.

If you have something mean to say I'd really rather not hear it though, nothing personal....but I live with the king of mean....so I get enough already!

thanks

Ok not being mean, just being honest. Sometimes it is necessary for us to hear things we don't want to.

School can wait. Your parents can and will get over it. Nursing school has been around for over 100 years. It will be there when you need it. Browse these forums. You will see that Excelsior is tough enough when personal issues are at a minimum. Get your life together then attack EC with full force. You will prevail.

On to the King of Mean (KOM). You need to get out of there. Here is where the honesty (not trying to be mean) part comes in: it is about your kids. You are the adult which means you need to make adult decisions. If he is mean then they are seeing that (there is no way they are not). They don't need to see that. They see you tolerating and accepting meanness, then they will grow up thinking that meanness is acceptable. It will affect how they relate to others when they become adults. You are responsible for the enviroment they are in. Only you.

My insight is simple: get out. Get out now.

Let me as an ex-cop give you some more insight: mean guys do mean things and sometimes things escalate (see above regarding your kids and their environment). In other words mean people say mean things and eventually (if not already) they will do mean things. Again, you children are watching and learning.

If you don't think you have the resources to get out then talk to your parents. If that is not an option (and sometimes it is not) then there are others. We can discuss if you would like.

Hope this helps,

Ivan