I hate being a CNA

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Hi everyone, I really need some advice. So I'm going into my junior year as a BSN student. This summer i decided to get a CNA job as a way to get some experience and build my resume. I got hired at a "rehab" facility. Turns out, all the patients are basically hospice despite me being told they were all rehab patients. I have a total of 5 orientation shifts, and i just worked one so far. I hated it. I went home and cried. I really don't like doing that kind of care and I felt so lost and helpless. Just thinking about working another shift puts me on the verge of a panic attack. I don't need the money, but I need the experience, but I'd much rather work in a doctor's office or something. Everyone is saying just tough it out until the end of august, but I don't know how I'm going to get through another shift, much less 3 months. Any advice?

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Specializes in ICU Stepdown.

What don't you like about it?

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Specializes in NICU, ICU, PICU, Academia.

One shift? Just stick it out- it's valuable experience. It's not about you being happy really. ALL patients need care- you will learn a lot of valuable things if you don't give up- nothing if you do.

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I don't really, know, i just don't like it. I don't like the heavy lifting (I'm about 100lbs soaking wet), it is just like we are basically waiting for people to die. I also don't like changing adult diapers, and it seems like everyone around me knows exactly what to do for their patients, and I just don't. I asked my mentor a bunch of questions, but i still feel like i don't know how to do anything.

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Is the issue that you do not like the kind of general care you must provide as a CNA, or is it that you're uncomfortable working hospice-type cases?

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Purple roses, I think its a little but of both. I'd rather do vitals and learn to do EKGs or something more technical and less turning and feeding and transferring. I also don't enjoy seeing patients who no longer want to live refuse food and not speak.

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Specializes in Critical Care.

As an RN you will be transferring patients. You'll be the person the patient is refusing meds from. When you don't have a tech or can't find your tech, you will be cleaning those soiled linens. You will have patients die.

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I don't really, know, i just don't like it. I don't like the heavy lifting (I'm about 100lbs soaking wet), it is just like we are basically waiting for people to die. I also don't like changing adult diapers, and it seems like everyone around me knows exactly what to do for their patients, and I just don't. I asked my mentor a bunch of questions, but i still feel like i don't know how to do anything.

Ah, ok. Seems like it's a mix of both. I felt this way the first time I worked with a dying person. I hated it, because it felt so odd to know that a patient was dying and to know there was nothing I could do. It felt awkward and sad. It was even harder to watch the family grieve (my first client that died was only in his 60s...he died just before his daughter's wedding). But honestly, it gets better. You get stronger and become someone that the family can lean on, and it's honestly very rewarding, for me at least. However you may just never get comfortable with hospice-type care, and that's ok too. Not everyone is meant to go into hospice.

As for the BMs, I hear you! One of my first clients was an incontinent gentleman with C-diff. Yeah. I cleaned 8 adult-sized C-diff depends within a 12 hour shift...I can now safely say that I am immune to gross stuff! Seriously, it doesn't even phase me anymore. And it is a part of caring for a patient...it's honestly something you have to get used to. It's not comfortable, it's awkward when you're starting out, and I'm sure you're afraid of hurting your resident. I promise, you really get more comfortable with it.

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Maybe you will learn to like it. Stick it out for a while. Think about it as service to others who can't do for themselves. It will give you a basic foundation for Nursing. Help you become more observant and diligent. Teach consolidation and time management. If you still don't like it, might want to reconsider being a Nurse. We wipe butts too 😉

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I just don't know if i can stick it out because it gives me so much anxiety just thinking about it.

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Specializes in ICU Stepdown.

Maybe you need to reevaluate everything if you think you can't handle it? Nurses do everything that a CNA does as well as their own duties. There are different allied health careers besides nursing...

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Purple roses, I think its a little but of both. I'd rather do vitals and learn to do EKGs or something more technical and less turning and feeding and transferring. I also don't enjoy seeing patients who no longer want to live refuse food and not speak.

I'll let another poster tackle the whole, "I only want to do technical stuff," because I'm sure that's coming.

As for your residents that do not wish to live. Most of them are probably elderly. They hurt. Their bodies aren't working anymore, and they can feel that. Their lives have become a monotonous routine. Their stomachs hurt, they don't get to see the people they love, they don't have many friends. They no longer feel useful, they often feel like they don't have a purpose. And they want to die. There are no more bright spots in their life and they want to die. You have the opportunity to be a bright spot in their lives. You get to be the caring person who makes them as comfortable as you possibly can in their last phase of life. It's a big deal.

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