I cant be a nurse anymore

[Cg134357]

I have been a nurse for 7 years. Most of my life I felt I knew I wanted to be a nurse and help others. I graduated with my BSN and worked in a trauma/surgical ICU for 3 years. I learned a lot, but I dreaded work everyday and realized that the ICU just isn't for me. I was very hopeful that I would find another place in nursing I'd enjoy. After ICU, I went to work in interventional radiology and was okay with it but still had the same feelings and anxieties, I just did not like it. I didn't want to go and would call out, I felt like I just was not invested in the job. I started to realize that I don't like nursing. It's hard to pinpoint exactly what I don't like about it, but I am very quiet and an introvert and struggle with anxiety. So after almost 4 years in IR I left to work as a case manager for an insurance company. I work from home which is great, but I absolutely hate the job. The case loads are crazy and my anxiety around making calls to patients is overwhelming. It's only going to get worse as I just learned that my caseload is going to be growing tremendously over the next few weeks and I can only imagine how anxious I will be. I am not looking forward to my future here and need to figure something out. I feel so lost in my career and life. I spent so much money and time working to become a nurse, that to now realize I hate it and it is just not for me is soo so frustrating. I have no idea what else to do. I don't want to work in healthcare anymore, but I have no idea what other lane to choose. I have no real hobbies or talents that can help guide me. I just want to be happy and not miserable and anxious all day while at work. I have no idea what to do. I have always enjoyed caring for the geriatric population, and have always been interested in long term care or skilled nursing facilities, but I am terrified to apply there to just find out I hate that too.  

[Charlcie, BSN, RN]

Have you considered nursing informatics? depending on the job you can work from home or in a less interactive role still in the hospital. I have some friends who love it. Another poster mentioned private care nursing, which could involve a geriatric population you said could be a good patient population for you. Regardless, best of luck, keep us posted! 

[Chikungunya]

Thank you Charlcie,

I will definitely look into nursing informatics or any less direct patient care jobs around. It has been a challenge for me because of my location. 

[caramelwolf089, BSN, RN]

I'm sorry to hear that. I know that it can be frustrating and disheartening trying to figure out what it best for you. Long term care like you mentioned, school nurse, dialysis nurse, or maybe even a doctors office could be options.

Those outpatient jobs can be monotonous and predictable but it could be what you need since you mentioned that you have anxiety. 

[Chikungunya]

Thank you Caramelwolf089,

Right now, I am still on medications and counseling for my anxiety and depression. Trying to fight it through walking and exercise too. I am looking to those options too but trying to get back myself first for the meantime. 

[nursing9462]

On 7/12/2021 at 11:03 PM, Been there,done that said:

I worked at home for an insurance company for many years. I was in Utilization management.  Sure it was busy... but I was in my jammies. You could search for other work from home your/ UM positions and companies that won't' flog you into a huge caseload.

Since you like working with seniors, check out disease management positions.

I word forget SNF/LTC . I worked a few shifts as agency  there. I could not keep up with 25 years of bedside experience.

If you are dead set on getting out of healthcare, consult a counselor from your school. They can test you for your strengths and guide you.

Good luck

Curious what a reasonable utilization management caseload is per day? Thanks!

[Chamita]

When I read your post it sounded just like me. Very sorry that you had to go through all that.  I was wondering if you ever found something that was a better fit for you?

[Chikungunya]

Hello Chamita,

Right now I am doing homecare nursing but I am currently looking into going back to school to be a Histo Technologist. It will take me 12mos to finish and I already found my clinical placement. All the lectures will be online.

Hello Chamita.

[Been there,done that, ASN, RN]

On 10/5/2021 at 11:29 PM, nursing9462 said:

Curious what a reasonable utilization management caseload is per day? Thanks!

That would depend on the position. I worked for an insurance company,  handling hospital requests for admissions. There was always an admission to be processed. As far as productivity, as long as you were mid range.. all was good.