How do I deal with these rude family members?

World UK

Published

Specializes in Haematology Nurse.

Hi everyone!

I'm only 3 weeks into my charge nurse role and just today one of my night staff was shouted at by an angry family member before report and she cried. To begin with, the patient is terminally ill after an accidental perforation during a scope. The family was called to the ward and had been spoken as to what the plan was for the patient - which is Comfort Care /palliation - which means all antibiotics was stopped and vital signs monitoring was stopped as well as we werent gonna act on any abnormalities his vitals anymore - so mostly it just consists of nursing care and administration of palliative medications or analgesia.

For the past 2 night shifts, my staff had noted rude behaviour from the patient's children - accusing us that we were treating the patient like an animal and that we werent't checking on him regularly. For the past 2 nightd they also complained that the nursed had not been checking his vital signs. So the nurse got the doctors doen to speak to the patient two nights in a row to explain to them what palliative care is but since it has happened twice already I have a feeling they don't seem to understand what is being told to them.... or rather they are just in denial that the patient is dying... or they're just nasty.

I am coming into work today and I want to nip most of these in the bud? What should I do as charge nurse? 

Specializes in Emergency Department.

Document, document, document.

You know this is going down the complaints procedure route.

As the Charge Nurse it is your role to support your staff so make sure that they know that. Have a word with the family at the start of the shift and explain (again) what is happening. Also explain that abuse, verbal or physical, will not be tolerated and even though you understand that the family are angry and upset if they do cross the line they WILL be ejected, by police if necessary.

Let the family know that obs are not needed and why - as has been explained to them - but someone will be in every couple of hours to carry out pressure area care and oral hygiene.

 

"...the patient is terminally ill after an accidental perforation during a scope."

THAT ⬆️ is your biggest problem here, everything is the hospitals fault because of a mistake. Expect law suits.

Good luck, you are in an unenviable situation not of your making.

Document, document, document.

1 Votes
Specializes in Advanced Practice, surgery.
On 1/1/2022 at 10:23 AM, Clinton Baban said:

Hi everyone!

I'm only 3 weeks into my charge nurse role and just today one of my night staff was shouted at by an angry family member before report and she cried. To begin with, the patient is terminally ill after an accidental perforation during a scope. The family was called to the ward and had been spoken as to what the plan was for the patient - which is Comfort Care /palliation - which means all antibiotics was stopped and vital signs monitoring was stopped as well as we werent gonna act on any abnormalities his vitals anymore - so mostly it just consists of nursing care and administration of palliative medications or analgesia.

For the past 2 night shifts, my staff had noted rude behaviour from the patient's children - accusing us that we were treating the patient like an animal and that we werent't checking on him regularly. For the past 2 nightd they also complained that the nursed had not been checking his vital signs. So the nurse got the doctors doen to speak to the patient two nights in a row to explain to them what palliative care is but since it has happened twice already I have a feeling they don't seem to understand what is being told to them.... or rather they are just in denial that the patient is dying... or they're just nasty.

I am coming into work today and I want to nip most of these in the bud? What should I do as charge nurse? 

What a distressing situation for all involved.  I would imagine the family are very angry as in thier eyes we have caused harm and this will result in the loss of thier loved one   

I think I would probably put some pre-emptive measures in place to support the family through such a difficult time 

Arrange regular meetings / catch ups with the family, give them the time and space to work through thier grief

Do the same for your staff, try to support them to see things from the families perspective 

Involve your complaints team / patient experience team to provide support and even support in those meetings, if there are questions you can't answer then say so but get back to the family ad soon as you can.

Make sure you have support from your matron/ senior nurse this is something they should get involved in 

Very sad situation 

2 Votes
Specializes in Oncology, ID, Hepatology, Occy Health.

This family needs telling very firmly that while they have a right to be upset, a right to be angry, a right to ask questions and a right to voice their concerns, they have no right to shout or be rude.

Wholeheartedly agree with Grumpy. Document everything. And speak to them with a witness: a doctor, nurse or care assistant on the grounds that "this professional is also involved in the care hence their presence......

Good luck.

1 Votes
Specializes in NICU.
On 1/3/2022 at 1:28 PM, XB9S said:

after an accidental perforation during a scope.

Truly devastating situation,the family must be so sad and angry.I don't know how my family would be in such a circumstance.

On 1/3/2022 at 1:28 PM, XB9S said:

I am coming into work today and I want to nip most of these in the bud?

This nip in the bud route will only antagonize a family that is already grieving.Be clear with management that you need their support ,supv should be visiting  family also.This  can only be handled with much love,understanding,patience.This is a big lawsuit looming,only speak with witness present,document  and then document.Explanations of palliative care do not matter...they already had an explanation of the proceedure  and look at the result,they trust no one at this point. Provide support,even  a shoulder to cry on,remember anger is usually depression.Speak softly,if they yell,do not turn your back (you might get hit)call the supv and religious support,do not let the supvisor bully you into sticking your neck out.This situation has escalated beyond bedside already,wake the director at home if you have to.

Good luck.

Specializes in Emergency Department.

How did it all work out? 

Any updates?

+ Add a Comment