How Do You Cope?

(Please don't capitalize the first letter of each word. Makes for a difficult read. Just a friendly suggestion. :))

I think with time it doesn't take a toll but makes me stronger and more compassionate, and causes me to look deep within myself, hopefully growing into a better person every day, one that isn't jaded by my experience.

Lately I've been carrying for a fresh quadraplegic patient. Very tragic, as he has sole custory of two children aged 2 and 3. I'm face to face with my own worst fear.

Sometimes you do have to cry and that's o.k.

I think though there are times when we as nurses have to hold it together, as we can't be the one's to fall apart because the patients and the familiy needs us. That's why we have each other to vent to.

Hi,

How do I cope?

One day at a time.

I don't mean to be pithy - but to me there really is no other way to describe it.

Thanks,

Matthew

Tragedy is always hard to deal with. Even for the most hardened person. Health worker's that don't show emotion in a particular situation, are probably focused on what they can do to help at that time. That does not mean that they are not bothered by it. They just have other ways of dealing with it. Like talking with co-workers or discussing a bad day with your spouse etc. Some people may even say they never get used to it. But, they continue to work in those environments because they want to try to make a difference. Just my two cents.

I cope by doing. Usually you're not thinking of the tragedy at the time, but rather what you can do to make things better. It's later that you have time to reflect. Mostly, it makes me grateful to be healthy and to have the priviledge to meet so many wonderful people.

In time, you come to realize that death is as natural a part of life as is birth. Sometimes it comes too soon and sometimes it's prolonged too long. You will come to find your own inner strength. Once you've realized that we are all mortal and we are all going to die, it helps some. There were always be those times when a death makes you feel just devastated. But I hope at some point in your career you'll be able to witness the death of a person who has had time to prepare for it and accepts it. And when they die with their loved ones all around and holding their hand, you can see the beauty of passing away when you're ready for it and know how much you're loved. My own grandmother passed away 32 days ago at the age of 96. I loved her more than I have ever loved anyone but I could accept her passing because it was what she wanted. Sorry this is so long but I want you to see that every death is not a tragedy.

One2one,

I am sorry for the passing of your grandma. I also know at 96, she was probably ready to leave this place. She is at peace now, and has no pain and that is the important thing. She will always be your angel!

Hugs,

Holly