How Do I Apologize to Professor?

[Valr]

Hello everyone,

I may be overthinking this but I need some help diffusing a faux pas I committed with my clinical instructor. I'm always afraid of stepping on a professor's toes and I've already done so with this one by arriving late to clinical twice this semester (I have a long commute to the hospital - I know, no excuses, but it's tough). I work hard and I do not want to be on a prof's bad side.

I have a meeting for another class this week (Wednesday). The meeting, however, cuts into some of my clinical time. I realized tonight (Monday) that I should let my prof know ASAP about this meeting and ask if it is okay that I will miss some of clinical over it. However, I didn't realize that I needed to let her know until 11:50 pm. I decided to text her anyway (all of our clinical instructors communicate with us through text). My reasoning was, "what if I wait til tomorrow? will she see that as irresponsible, that I waited the day RIGHT before the meeting to let her know I'll be late for clinical? Okay I'll just send the text now. If she's sleeping her phone is likely to be off and she'll read it first thing in the morning and it won't look so bad."

So I texted her and got a response along the lines of "I think it's quite inappropriate timing for this text. The issue at hand is not emergent. Please present yourself at the hospital upon finishing the meeting. No further discussion."

Naturally I **** myself a little and replied "I'm so sorry professor. I thought if it was too late your phone would be off and you'd see this tomorrow. Goodnight."

Do I bring this up when I see her this week at clinical? Should I apologize again, in person? Or should I just let it go? I'm afraid of there being tension. I actually admire this professor and learn a ton from her but I feel I keep messing up!

Thanks for whatever insight you guys are able to provide me. I appreciate it!

[kaylee.]

Just for the purpose of understanding the situation, how come you have a meeting scheduled on a clinical day?

If the meeting was planned prior to the clinical schedule, then the meeting should be considered tentative, pending clinical schedule.

Not sure what the nature of the meeting is, but it seems like somewhere along the line, the time conflict occurred. Just trying to figure out the whole story.

Just wondering why the meeting is the thing you must make, and its legit enough to call out of work without giving any notice.

If there are extenuating circumstances surrounding the meeting, make it a priority to explain to your clin. instructor. Say more than "i had a meeting". Not sure where the communication breakdown occured.

[JenTheSchoolRN, BSN, RN]

Just for the purpose of understanding the situation, how come you have a meeting scheduled on a clinical day?

If the meeting was planned prior to the clinical schedule, then the meeting should be considered tentative, pending clinical schedule.

Not sure what the nature of the meeting is, but it seems like somewhere along the line, the time conflict occurred. Just trying to figure out the whole story.

Just wondering why the meeting is the thing you must make, and its legit enough to call out of work without giving any notice.

If there are extenuating circumstances surrounding the meeting, make it a priority to explain to your clin. instructor. Say more than "i had a meeting". Not sure where the communication breakdown occured.

I, too, am confused about a meeting during clinical time. When I was in nursing school, the school was aware of clinical schedules and meetings were never scheduled during them. Is this a meeting with another professor or with classmates for a group project? For either of those, I would simply say "I have clinical. This time does not work for me. When can we reschedule/can I get the information?"

Being late multiple times is a big no-no. (Heck, even once raises the red flag depending!) I had a friend in nursing school who was not a morning person. The person overslept and missed clinical twice!! She stayed in our program by the very skin of her teeth, but it was only through hoop after hoop (and I'm not even sure how she was able to do it!) and it haunted her later when she needed recommendations.

[Lev, MSN, RN, NP]

I think you should show up to clinical on time the day of the scheduled meeting. Look at your student handbook and look at excused absences. Are meetings for other classes allowed? To me this sounds like you have a group project of some sort or are meeting a teacher for another class and you accidentally agreed to meet on a clinical day. That can be rescheduled. Clinical can't. Show up on time next clinical, and the next, and the next. The last thing you want is to be dismissed from clinical.

[psu_213, BSN, RN]

I, too, am confused about a meeting during clinical time.

I would really like more details about the meeting, and why it was so important that it took precedence over clinicals. It seems unlikely that we will get those details.

[jdknyc]

Probably not the best time to correct her misuse of "emergent".

[RockSolid]

I agree with most of the other comments. Clinicals take priority. Period. No class meeting is important enough for you to miss clinicals and I'm somewhat surprised that the professor signaled that you should go on to the meeting and and then come to clinicals late. Whatever... that's that professor. Overall, step up to the plate. Be responsible, be early to clinicals, don't miss clinicals. For that matter, be on time for class, too.

If you must put a communication "on record" in the middle of the night, send an email. Don't assume that someone will turn their phone off at night. I use mine as an alarm clock and never turn it off.

This prof may not be one you can have a more personal relationship with. The best way to repair whatever damage that was (or was not) done, I believe, is to be hyper professional. Impress them with your seriousness and your commitment. At some point (you'll know when it's appropriate) you can let them know how much you are learning from them and how much you respect them. In the meantime, just be on time and professional. The rest will take care of itself. Good luck in school and in your future career as a nurse!

[kflood]

Ugh. Posts like this make me so glad I have already jumped thru this hoop. I hear you, and I feel you. I went back to school to pursue "people nursing" in my 40's (I have a veterinary background as a credentialed veterinary technician) and was accepted into an accelerated program (BSN in a year). Nursing school across the board is very "black and white", and accelerated programs are even worse -- they often border on unreasonable. As far as "weeding people out who are weak" goes -- it is a reality, although I wouldn't say that anything you have demonstrated in your post implies weakness. The black and white world of nursing school is a huge pain in the tushie, and self care is never in the mix, even though they mention it in the occasional lecture to cover their butts. I would suggest completely letting this last situation go -- FORGET ABOUT IT.......... simplify your life a wee bit, and perhaps talk to other instructors who are scheduling meetings at times that conflict with clinicals. Make sure you are getting daily exercise (yes, daily!!!), eating well, taking breathers, staying connected with supportive people, and scheduling fun when you can. If you can do even 20 minutes a day of all the above, you are doing well. Leave 15 minutes earlier than you have to in order to arrive on time, but I don't suggest being obsessive and arriving an hour or two early and depriving yourself of much needed sleep before a 12 hour clinical shift. The hard-core, black and white thinkers who are slamming coffee in their cars two hours before the start of the day are the same nurses that will end up with heart disease and other chronic conditions down the road, which is common in nursing. There ARE environments in nursing that are a bit less extreme and better suited for particular temperments, but those will come after you graduate. For now, you do need to white knuckle it to some degree, and I know it isn't fun. I don't know your age, and it does take life experience to get to know yourself and know your limits, but keep them in mind AND ADJUST WHAT YOU CAN. In the meantime, don't let the rigid world of nursing school and nursing instructors break your spirit. I had several less than perfect situations come up with nursing instructors, and they aren't always in the right or "fair." You are allowed to be human to some degree, despite what they make you believe. Communicate honestly with the ones that you can talk to, and play the game with the ones you can't. Know your limits, simplify your life, and take care of yourself every day. Things will fall into place when you are less stressed and overwhelmed....... forgetting about meetings til the last minute and being "late" is a sign that you are overwhelmed. All the best to you.

[kflood]

P.S.) Just an aside here, for what it's worth: I had an emergency with my dog during one of my scheduled clinicals. Luckily, I had scheduled too many, so I left a message immediately and was in no danger of coming up short. I had also never been late. Despite all of that, my preceptor made a snarky comment the next time I saw him about "the choice" I made. I HAD A MEDICAL EMERGENCY WITH MY DOG. Despite being an arrogant, hyped up, caffeinated jerk with poor boundaries (another story), he clearly was not an animal person (but of course someone's kid would be another story).............. my point is, the people who are teaching you and precepting you are not always good people, kind people, reasonable people, or smart people -- just because they are working as nurses or teaching nursing students. Just keep that in the back of your mind as you get thru the rest of this. Be on time, take care of yourself, get the best grades you can without hurting yourself, and let the rest go.

[auralae]

I would play it by ear. But in all honesty, a commute is no excuse for being late. I live 30 minutes away from my designated hospital & I leave an hour before I am scheduled to be there. This takes care of any traffic issues or if I need to stop to get gas, etc. I would highly suggest buying yourself a planner and begin using it ASAP. Personally, the only way that I can stay on top of everything is to write down all of my due dates and class / clinical times at the beginning of the semester. All of your requirements and your instructors expectations will increase the further you go. Part of this entire process is learning to be responsible for yourself and respectful to your instructors and peers by being prepared. You are going to school to be one of the most respected and trusted professionals out there, so it's time to start acting like one! Good luck!

[mrsboots87]

What the heck kind if meeting is more important than clinical? This meeting was likely planned well before 2 days ahead. You should have figured this out a while ago and canceled the meeting. The only meeting that would possibly take precedence over clinical would be one that is discussing whether you can stay in the program or not and they wouldn't put that on a clinical day anyway. You need to set your priorities better. Also there is no excuse for being late. I live about an hour from my clinical site. I leave at minimum 1.5 hours early and usually 2 hours early just to be safe so I can get there and eat a light snack before we start for the day. Sounds like you need to get it together.

[melkay60]

I agree, I am a third semester student and the fact that you have been late now 3x constitutes an absence. You do not miss class or clinicals for any reason (or be tardy) other than emergencies and I mean true emergencies.... Good luck

[ICURN7]

Hmm! Valr, you are in trouble today! …lolzz

Ok having "bashed" her out…can someone now say more positive things to this student? I am sure she has learnt her lessons. It is not a time to start displaying how good of an Angel we were during clinical. She made a mistake and asked for help. Essentially, blaming or judging someone that comes to me for counseling is not very professional of me. I mean, i would definitely point out those errors she did and pat her back (encourage) with my positive closing remarks. Remembering not to loose focus about the questions she asked shows some professionalism...