How to avoid conflicts with instructor.

decembergrad2011, BSN, RN · Jul 9, 2012

As unfortunate as this is, I think it is common for instructors to be condescending, especially at first. You do not want to stand out in nursing school unless it is in the "I'm the president of all of the clubs" type. Try to fly under the radar, get your requirements done, and pass the course. It's very doubtful that lecturing her style will do you any favors. Just my experience :)

Double-Helix, BSN, RN · Jul 9, 2012

Can you give specific examples of her behavior?

I often find that some instructors have high expectations of their students- and they let them know it. What the students view as condescending and mean behavior is actually the instructor trying to push the students to a higher level. Rarely do I find that instructors are rude just to be rude. Rather their style of instructing is not the soft, take-you-by-the hand style that the students like or are accustomed to. It's a higher level of expectation where the instructor expects the student to put in the effort, study the material in advance, and be prepared to answer the questions and discussion in class.

When I was in my second semester of nursing school, I had an instructor for Health Assessment. At first, I really disliked her. I felt that she acted like she thought we were stupid. If we answered a question wrong or didn't know an answer, her response was to shortly tell us we were wrong. She didn't coddle us and expected that we take the initiative to learn and understand the material. Her tests and assignments were hard, and a lot of people complained. Because her approach was so unfamiliar, students took it as being mean and critical.

But you know what I realized at the end of the that year? She taught that way because she knew that we were capable of performing at a higher level. She was trying to push as to start taking responsibility for our own learning and start thinking like independent, intelligent nurses. She knew that we were adults. We didn't need to be coddled and led through the course. We needed to learn how to be strong critical thinkers who didn't rely on someone else to help us find the answers.

This instructor became one of my most trusted advisors and mentor. As I matured, I learned just how much she really cared about the success of her students. There was nothing condescending or mean about her approach. It was designed to push us into a higher level of professionalism and learning that we otherwise would not have attained. Sophomore students still have trouble adjusting to her teaching, but her senior students adore her.

My advice to you is to focus on what you can learn from this instructor. Chances are she has tons of wisdom to offer you, if you can learn to adjust to her teaching style and not take her harsher style of instruction personally. Learn her expectations. Does she expect you to come to class prepared? Then do the reading ahead of time. Does she expect you to look up an answer before asking a question? The try to look it up yourself and when you ask, explain where you looked and what you found. Realize that all instructors have different teaching styles and very few people are just plain mean. I think you will come to find that this instructor is not actually condescending- you just aren't used to her methods.

Esme12, ASN, BSN, RN · Jul 9, 2012

Can you give specific examples of her behavior?
I often find that some instructors have high expectations of their students- and they let them know it. What the students view as condescending and mean behavior is actually the instructor trying to push the students to a higher level. Rarely do I find that instructors are rude just to be rude. Rather their style of instructing is not the soft, take-you-by-the hand style that the students like or are accustomed to. It's a higher level of expectation where the instructor expects the student to put in the effort, study the material in advance, and be prepared to answer the questions and discussion in class.
When I was in my second semester of nursing school, I had an instructor for Health Assessment. At first, I really disliked her. I felt that she acted like she thought we were stupid. If we answered a question wrong or didn't know an answer, her response was to shortly tell us we were wrong. She didn't coddle us and expected that we take the initiative to learn and understand the material. Her tests and assignments were hard, and a lot of people complained. Because her approach was so unfamiliar, students took it as being mean and critical.
But you know what I realized at the end of the that year? She taught that way because she knew that we were capable of performing at a higher level. She was trying to push as to start taking responsibility for our own learning and start thinking like independent, intelligent nurses. She knew that we were adults. We didn't need to be coddled and led through the course. We needed to learn how to be strong critical thinkers who didn't rely on someone else to help us find the answers.
This instructor became one of my most trusted advisors and mentor. As I matured, I learned just how much she really cared about the success of her students. There was nothing condescending or mean about her approach. It was designed to push us into a higher level of professionalism and learning that we otherwise would not have attained. Sophomore students still have trouble adjusting to her teaching, but her senior students adore her.
My advice to you is to focus on what you can learn from this instructor. Chances are she has tons of wisdom to offer you, if you can learn to adjust to her teaching style and not take her harsher style of instruction personally. Learn her expectations. Does she expect you to come to class prepared? Then do the reading ahead of time. Does she expect you to look up an answer before asking a question? The try to look it up yourself and when you ask, explain where you looked and what you found. Realize that all instructors have different teaching styles and very few people are just plain mean. I think you will come to find that this instructor is not actually condescending- you just aren't used to her methods.

I can't like this enough!!!!!

classicdame, MSN, EdD · Jul 10, 2012

agree with above. Also, be sure you are not using body language that speaks negatively, like rolling your eyes, or scowling, etc. Don't be judged as having a bad attitude. Try pretending to be super sweet if you have to, just to get thru this class. Remember that this, too, will pass. Good luck with this course!

windowrn · Jul 12, 2012

I think Ashley said it all beautifully.

The only other thing I wonder is that you said that the instructor is rubbing you the wrong way, yet your classes don't even begin for a week. I am wondering what necessitates enough contact with an instructor a week before classes start that could leave that much of an impression. She may well be on her break as well. If you are asking lots of questions before you even begin, she may just prefer that you wait and get your questions answered at the same time as your classmates. I know it is natural to be anxious and nursing students tend to like to know what will happen. But, in nursing school much of the time we need to focus on what is happening.

MN-Nurse, ASN, RN · Jul 12, 2012

LPN classes officially start in a week. Already I am getting rubbed wrong by one of the instructors. Is it the norm for an instructor to be condescending as a general rule? Is the name of the game here to just suck it up, bite my tongue, and make darn skippy sure that I maintain good grades and ride it out?
Is there a proper way to address this, if necessary and at a later date, or do I suck up being treated like a child? Things on my end are rock solid. It seems to be her style as opposed to a personal issue.

I was never in the military, but I regarded nursing instructors like drill instructors. Right or wrong, it's their world and I am just in it for a couple years.

Yes sir, no sir, thank you for my Authorization To Test, smell ya later.

HM-8404, BSN, RN · Jul 16, 2012

Since you gave no details everything you are getting as a response is purely speculation.

It very well may be the instructor is on break and wants a rest before classes start. She is not as excited as you about this semester starting.

On the other hand, this may really be an instructor that is not very personable. Not all nurses have a warm personality just like not all instructors can actually teach. By the end of your first week in class you will get a feel for how this instructor is.

Wild Irish LPN, LPN · Jul 17, 2012

My favorite PN instructors were always the "hard as***"....I knew what was expected and the standards were high, but fair....these women pushed myself and others to not just be adequate, but to be excellent....and that is what they will get from me each day I hit the floor....

DisneyNurseGal, BSN, RN · Jul 17, 2012

When I was taking my pre-req's there was a teacher who was NOTORIOUS for being hard and rude. I was nervous because I had to take her Human Biology class because it was the only one that fit into my schedule. Before class started, I went to her office and she was borderline rude, condescending, and now I was terrified. At that time I asked her 'How do I be successful in your class" and her reply was "Do the work, study hard and maybe you will get a C".

In class, she frequently called out those who clearly hadn't read the text book, and had no patience for stupid questions that could be answered by re-reading your notes. Over time, we became to be good friends and I eventually took Physiology from her. Her classes WERE the hardest I had ever taken, but I learned so much from her. I followed her advice and I ended up with A's in both the classes I took from her. Her pre-nursing students did on average 10 points higher on the science portion of the entrance exam than those who had other teacher.

Moral of the story, things aren't always what they seem. I know your reaction is to run the other way from this professor, but I am here to say to run towards her [proverbially of course]. Seek her out during office hours, ask thoughtful, meaningful questions that show that you are prepared, and be the best student you can be. Give her a chance, she still may be condescending but if you do the things I said above, maybe you can avoid being the target of her wrath.

Icebox521 · Jul 17, 2012

you must be the teacher~LOL

loriangel14, RN · Jul 17, 2012

Teachers are not here to be nice and give you the warm fuzzies.You going to be dealing with people's lives and they need to make sure you know your stuff.You want warm and fuzzy get a puppy.The toughest teacher I ever had in school was the one I learned the most from.She was demanding and expected us to do our homework.She knew if you hadn't read the chapter.She was also a great nurse.Once you get out in the real world you will have to learn to work with people that you may not like personally either but you will have to work with them none the less.Managers are seldom warm and fuzzy either.