Hey Kday, OBnurse Heather and others

Specialties Ob/Gyn


  • by Q.
    Specializes in LDRP; Education.

There is an interesting thread in the General discussion about leeches of society. Somehow, the topic got thrown off course and I am in a debate with another nurse about whether a woman who had conceived as a result of abuse or rape is a Labor and Delivery nurse's business. I think it is, and my reply was posted as such.

I guess I was wondering if I am alone in this thought. On my unit, we like to know these things for obvious reasons. This person called me a "supposed nurse" and now I feel like I am second-quessing myself. Thoughts?


6,620 Posts

WHAT?! Not your business? Then how the hell are you supposed to provide good nursing care and discharge planning? I think any nurse would agree that knowing a child has been conceived in rape does change the atmosphere and the support level needed by the mother. Not to mention the fact that she will be alone with the child after discharge and may need access to certain services in the community. Can you give me one logical reason why it wouldn't be important for us to know? Don't second guess yourself Susy. You KNOW I probably disagree with you half the time, but on this even I agree with you ;). So keep your chin up. I would have you look after me any day.


5 Posts

You are NOT second guessing yourself. You are right!!!! Knowing her past and history is what puts you in the right direction regarding social work consults etc. Also, having been raped, you nor the doctor can just go in and cram your hands to check her. Talk about reliving the nightmare. We recently had a rape victim where the doctor was checking her like clockwork and literally forcing her hand there to check her. The patient kept saying wait but the doctor (who was a WOMAN) paid her no attention. The patient cried and cried.

Also, if you didn't know the whole story and she made no attempt to bond with the baby, wouldn't you be more apt to talk about her with co-workers and call her a bad mother?


1,961 Posts

I had to go read the leeches thread to see what all the hoopla was about...

I don't remember who your debate was with Suzy, but the fact that she doesn't feel the patient's history is relevant to her care frightens me. OB is a very personal type of nursing, we know things about patients that their families, even husbands, don't know. My guess would be that this nurse does some general type of nursing and has absolutely no idea of the scope of obstetrics.

And whomever that nurse was, she jumped to a very harsh conclusion by calling you a "so-called nurse". Someone else said that we don't know that you treat all of you patients the same... "we only have her word for it". All of these people are making conclusions of their own about how terrible you are for jumping to conclusions!!!! WHAT THE HELL!!! I have some conclusions of my own.. people around here are way too freakin sensitive lately. I don't even enjoy posting here anymore because I feel like I'm walking on eggshells.

Suzy, keep your head up. Don't let anyone shut you up. I may not always agree with what you say, but I admire you for always having the balls to say it.

I'm sorry to the origional poster of "leeches". I'm sure she didn't mean for it to turn into this. She was just coming to a nursing forum to vent on a particularily bad day. She didn't know we had to be politically correct here....

Go figure...



2,259 Posts

Specializes in LDRP; Education.

Thanks you guys. After sleeping on it, I realized that the right thing to do IS know the histoy in as much detail as we could. I was just so alarmed at the question - "whether she was raped or not - is it any of your business?" Coming from another nurse, I was stunned.

But again, this just seems to prove that people always think OB nurses just sit there, give pain meds and say "push." ARGHHH!

Heather, I am a bit outspoken I guess - but oddly enough, I am VERY, VERY quiet in person. I usually don't say much. I am always kind, appropriate and professional - and then if I get to know you, I will say the darnedest things in confidence. I guess this is how I viewed the bulletin board.

People ARE too sensitive around here; I haven't a clue why. Jesus!


6,620 Posts

Originally posted by Susy K

But again, this just seems to prove that people always think OB nurses just sit there, give pain meds and say "push." ARGHHH!


What you mean you do more than that?:rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: ;)

bagladyrn, RN

2,286 Posts

Specializes in OB.

Susy K- I thought all we did was sit around all night and rock babies:D . It is amazing, though, how many languages I can say "PUSH" in.

Seriously, of course it is important to know if the patient has a history of rape or sexual abuse, even if it wasn't the cause of this pregnancy. As pointed out above, it can affect the patient's reaction to invasive gyn procedures.. It can also affect her reaction to the whole birthing process. I've seen women very hypersensitive to any sensation in the genital area-screaming for pain meds at the first contraction, as well as those who react by totally disassociating themselves from bodily sensations- showing no visible response. The emotional responses after birth then need to be dealt with.

It's too bad so many people don't get that there doesn't need to be a "winner" in a difference of opinion, and that someone isn't bad or inferior in their practice for taking a different view. I tend to be very opinionated, but recognize it for that-opinion, and love a good debate just for the mental exercise.


2,259 Posts

Specializes in LDRP; Education.
Originally posted by bagladyrn

I tend to be very opinionated, but recognize it for that-opinion, and love a good debate just for the mental exercise.

You are someone after my own heart. I LOVE debates. Usually I learn quite a bit from them. Not to mention, putting your opinions down on "paper" so to speak (on the bulletin board) in a cohesive and intelligent manner is good mental exercise as well. I'm glad I'm not the only one. I love debates, but I hate arguing. There IS a difference. :)

And Fergus, you sassy girl. Ok, I DO do a little more than say "push" and give pain meds. I also stare at the fetal monitor for no apparent reason and I occasionally hold a leg or two back. ;)


6,620 Posts

Originally posted by Susy K

And Fergus, you sassy girl. Ok, I DO do a little more than say "push" and give pain meds. I also stare at the fetal monitor for no apparent reason and I occasionally hold a leg or two back. ;)

Ha! I can't believe how many nurses actually think that. Off topic I know, but I had a run in with a nurse suffering from a severe case of ICU snobbery the other day and it reminded me of this. Wanna beat her up for me? I am a little bit scared of her, but I somehow have the impression you could take her....;)


2,259 Posts

Specializes in LDRP; Education.

Must be the Sicilian in me. I DO have mafia connections ya know. ;)


577 Posts

It is your business, mine and society's!

That's where trouble starts: ignoring and not caring about new borns and how their mothers' cope.

These children are innocent, they're not to blame at all and a lot of these mothers too.

The one's I take care of are not the best informated, nor the best in the intelligent department, not do they have the best familiy ties or support.

Oh and all I teach my students is how to say push in German, English, French, Italian, Turkish, Arab and Spanish:D

for the good students: how to make a bottle with formula

(in the 1 year)

(2 year)

how to plug in the CTG

for the good students: how to give a bottle with formula

(3 year)

how to reset the CTG

last but not least for the outstanding students: how to use a rocking chair, while feeding a newborn

O yes, our school's standards are very high!

;) Renee


8 Posts

So, since I see that other's are dealing with that same mentality that OB Nurses don't do anything. ie: rock babies, yell push, etc. :D I would be interested to know how you all deal with that attitude and get management to recognize you for the important staff memeber that you are. We are dealing with that now and are fighting for respect as OB Nurses. We are being told that we have to be more productive. :confused: I feel we are just as productive as ICU, Med/Surg etc. but convincing them of that is a fight. We do about 120 del a year and so they are wanting to make us take Med/Surg pts as well as OB pts when we have 1-2 PP Moms and babys. We don't want to but how do we convince them that it is a bad idea???? We've tried but it has been to no avail......any suggestions:rolleyes:

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