Helping out a co worker/friend

[blessedmomma247]

Hi guys...I could really use some help. I have a co worker that made a horrible mistake and I want to help her. I have worked with her on and off for several years. She has two disabled children, plus 3 other children. To make things worse, her husband was recently killed in a car accident back in October. Despite all this, she has remained a strong, hard working nurse. She loves her job and her patients. She is a great nurse. If there was a call in or extra hours that needed to be picked up; you can bet she was there. Then there was an incident where a patient who was in for s/p total knee replacement. The patient did not tolerant the surgery very well and had complications while trying to wake up post op. He was really confused and in a lot of pain. He also was allergic to a lot of meds...he even had problems with Tylenol (caused his nose to bleed). Anyway, one night, he was in a lot of pain, she gave him the PRNs he did have available and he was still in pain. She called the on call and while she was on the phone with the doctor, the patient fell out of bed and broke his hip. To make things worse; while in surgery to repair the hip; he coded and didn't make it off the table. There is this huge investigation and the family is suing. Two days later, when I show up to work, there is police and human resources. Everyone was getting pulled in and was questioned about a missing wallet from another employee. The IT guys were working on the video cameras to see and then everyone was shocked when they finally saw who took the wallet. It was her. And she admitted it when questioned by the police. She told them she only took the cash..$73...and hid the wallet in a resident's room. The police and the victim were able to confirm that no credit cards or bank info were stolen. She said she just panicked because she didn't have anything to get the kids for Christmas and was too embarrassed to asked for help. Everyone is so shocked by the news and would have helped her if she just asked. Now she has no job and is facing misdemeanor charges as well as the facing the board of nursing. The victim didn't want to press charges but the police are still investigating and the DON didn't want to fire her but it was out of her hands.

SO my question is can she get another job ? What should she tell her future employer during an interview? What actions will the board of nursing take? A few other nurse and I took up a collection and made meals for her. SHe is completely sick over what she did. Even the victim is helping her and they remain friends. Thanks for your help!!

[Emergent, RN]

Sounds bad for her. She has big problems if she steals from coworkers. She should get psychological help. Stealing is often a symptom of unresolved anger, not a normal response to losing a spouse.

I think the excuse that the money was needed for Christmas presents is BS. I was a widow with kids. I got about $2,500 from social security monthly for the kids, plus I worked. I was doing quite well, and was able to work part time, and live well.

[OrganizedChaos, LVN]

I'm sorry she is going through all of that. She should speak to a therapist/psychiatrist & her malpractice insurance if she has it, which I hope she does!

I understand times are tight but stealing $73 from someone's wallet isn't going to get her very far. Now if she stole his credit card or bank information (still wrong) it would made more sense since she could've gotten more money.

I hope she gets all of this sorted out.

[LadyFree28, BSN, LPN, RN]

Wow.

The best thing you co-worker needs is professional help to sort out why she stole from one of her patients; she also, hopefully she has this, needs to call her malpractice carrier to help mitigate her damages that will be coming along soon to her license, and ultimately, her career.

That's great that you and your co-workers and EVEN the victim are helping her; however, she needs to be proactive enough to get legal representation that is familiar with the BON and nursing malpractice suits.

Best wishes.

[caliotter3]

Yeah, I got social security for my child when my spouse died. No excuse. She either has an ongoing problem or suffered from a temporary brain misfiring, either way, she is going to need a lot of repair work. It is good that the victim and coworkers are stepping up to the plate, but somebody is going to have to come up with something big soon. She needs to pay her living expenses or she will face eviction and possible problems with keeping her kids. People can help her by steering her in the direction of social service agencies and private help, such as through church groups, or better yet, help her find a job. She needs to visit the social security office to find out how the legal problem could affect her widow's benefit, the children's benefits should not be affected. She also needs to put in for every type of welfare that her children qualify for; get the ball rolling, in case a new job is not around the corner.

[bluegeegoo2, LPN]

Maybe I'm too hard-nosed but there is never a justifiable reason to steal. Period. We have all had our hard times. It's how you deal with them that counts. She made a tragic error and will face the consequences. Now is the time for her to consolidate her feces and decide which direction she wants to go with her life for her own sake and as well for the sake of her children. Best of luck to her.

[ktwlpn, LPN]

I'll admit I am a cynical old ho-my first thought was surprise she is not diverting,my second is "protect yourself". Don't let yourself be manipulated. As others have stated she is getting money for the disabled children and social security for them all now her husband is gone.It sounds like she is crying out for help-hopefully she has some family support.Just remember there are two sides to every story.