What's the reason for a RN to be snippy to a new post op pt. ? - page 11

OK. I don't want to fluff any feathers. I'm simply trying to get an opinion to experienced nurses and try to see this from the nurses point of view. I'm a nursing student so my POV is still very... Read More

  1. by   Ruby Vee
    Quote from momofqc
    i asked for opinions and it turned into a bloodbath. like stated before, it's understandable to be defensive and justify other nurses...only natural. i've not attacked or belittled anyone and haven't said anything that other nurses haven't posted or said to me before.
    you're judging and condemning.
  2. by   momofqc
    Quote from cherrybreeze
    Agreed. And no one ever said the family WASN'T an integral part of patient care, for crying out loud.....but that doesn't mean they do my job for me. Your interpretation of that statement needs a lot of revising, stop thinking in absolutes. Just because someone isn't agreeing with all of the things you are saying doesn't mean they think the patient's family is of no value or has no role at all. There's a lot of gray area here.

    The more you post, the more I think that your original description of the events is inaccurate. If you had ANY of the attitude that day, in that room, that you do here, it's not surprising in the least why that nurse responded to you like she did.


    I didn't say anything to the nurse. I sat and took a back seat. This was all witnessed without me intervening. And yes, several said they would rather the family just leave and not be there so they could take care of their pt., except on a med-surg floor nurses are too bogged down with work to be able to do "everything" for an immediate post op pt. Families do little things that the cna or nurse doesn't have time to. And if the cna or nurse doesn't have time to do it or it doesn't fall high enough on the priority list it doesn't get done. Little things like giving the pt a drink of water, getting fresh water, helping them reposition in bed, letting staff know that the airbed doesn't work and the pt's back is hurting, bathing, getting chapstick...these are all things that either my sister or I were there to do for my mother.....if we weren't there who would have been able to do these things?
  3. by   momofqc
    Quote from RedhairedNurse
    You just described customer service. You are there to protect them, you are providing your
    patients, sometimes refered to as clients, SAFE & PROTECTED......you are providing
    them with a service as their professional nurse which means the same thing to me.
    Just be respectful, that is the point I'm trying to make.


    exactly!
  4. by   texas_lvn
    That all being said. My mother's nurse was less than enthusiastic that my mom would get talkative with her, my mom simply does this out of nervousness (esp with people she just met). I told the nurse I was a student and just about to graduate. I could make sure she did her incentive spirometer, kept and eye on her O2 sat, and let her know if we needed anything.

    You as a nurse are to be an advocate for your patients and anyone in pain. By you saying you did not do anything because you would not be there later that night hit a nerve with me. Are you saying that because you would not be there to deal with hearing your mom in pain, you didnt care?

    As for the chair, that was a very rude response. I am sorry you had to deal with this whole ordeal. It sounds like the nurse was overwhelmed. One of the main reasons there are only 2 chairs to begin with is that usually hospitals only "allow" 2 visitors at a time. I understand it was mom, and perhaps the nurse thought that with mom sleeping, and having medical assistance so close by that there wouldnt be so many people staying in the room for such an extended period of time.

    With you almost graduating, havent you come across a similar situation during clinicals?

    Hope your mom does get healed soon. BTW, hospitals will usually send out a questionaire regarding the visit. Be sure to place your concerns there.
  5. by   momofqc
    Quote from ruby vee
    you're judging and condemning.

    i didn't judge anyone, and condemning? my only disapproval is not being respectful to pt's/clients and families whether or not they are your prize pt/client. there is a better way to handle situations. (again, not talking about extreme "hands in the bloody chest" pts)
  6. by   cherrybreeze
    Quote from momofqc
    I didn't say anything to the nurse. I sat and took a back seat. This was all witnessed without me intervening. And yes, several said they would rather the family just leave and not be there so they could take care of their pt., except on a med-surg floor nurses are too bogged down with work to be able to do "everything" for an immediate post op pt. Families do little things that the cna or nurse doesn't have time to. And if the cna or nurse doesn't have time to do it or it doesn't fall high enough on the priority list it doesn't get done. Little things like giving the pt a drink of water, getting fresh water, helping them reposition in bed, letting staff know that the airbed doesn't work and the pt's back is hurting, bathing, getting chapstick...these are all things that either my sister or I were there to do for my mother.....if we weren't there who would have been able to do these things?
    I absolutely love that you are explaining how things work to the people that do it everyday, when you yourself do not.

    Who does those things? I do. Again, you're speaking in absolutes.....that either the nurse wants NO family present, or wants them to do everything. WHOLE lot of middle ground there. In case you missed it, I am one of those nurses that works on a med/surg floor, and while we ARE very busy, I wouldn't say that I don't have time to do "everything" for an immediate post op patient. That's my job. I do everything, and if you'd believe the patient feedback, do it damn well. Do you think that a patient that has no family that CAN be there, doesn't get those things done for them? Think again.

    You didn't get your chair. Get over it now. We're not the ones who didn't get you your chair. Did you ever stop to think that, after you had asked once, that your nurse didn't FORGET? Maybe it wasn't possible. Have you honestly not had an experience in your life where someone has made a request of you more than once, when you in fact just had not yet had time to address it? It's insulting. You have no idea what that "room full of furniture" actually was, but you make plenty of assumptions about it, don't you?

    I realize you didn't "say a word" during the whole thing (although based on this thread, I'm starting to doubt it). I didn't say that you did, I said if you had the same ATTITUDE, which I'm sure you know can be conveyed perfectly well while remaining silent.
  7. by   cherrybreeze
    Quote from momofqc
    I didn't judge anyone, and condemning? My only disapproval is not being respectful to pt's/clients and families whether or not they are your prize pt/client. There is a better way to handle situations. (again, not talking about extreme "hands in the bloody chest" pts)
    LOL!

    Pot, meet kettle.
  8. by   texas_lvn
    Quote from momofqc
    Fiona


    . I don't see anything wrong with family being the pt's advocate. There are too many horror stories out there not to be. Most nurses are great at their job given any situation not just the ideal.
    Being an advocate and asking for a 3rd chair more than 2 times from 2 different people is quite a different matter.
  9. by   caliotter3
    If any of this bothered the OP's mother, I certainly hope she took the opportunity to put her complaints on the post hosp questionnaire she received or will receive. If no survey, then a formal complaint should be made to the hospital.

    Added: And then be done with the matter.
  10. by   momofqc
    Quote from texas_lvn
    That all being said. My mother's nurse was less than enthusiastic that my mom would get talkative with her, my mom simply does this out of nervousness (esp with people she just met). I told the nurse I was a student and just about to graduate. I could make sure she did her incentive spirometer, kept and eye on her O2 sat, and let her know if we needed anything.

    You as a nurse are to be an advocate for your patients and anyone in pain. By you saying you did not do anything because you would not be there later that night hit a nerve with me. Are you saying that because you would not be there to deal with hearing your mom in pain, you didnt care?

    As for the chair, that was a very rude response. I am sorry you had to deal with this whole ordeal. It sounds like the nurse was overwhelmed. One of the main reasons there are only 2 chairs to begin with is that usually hospitals only "allow" 2 visitors at a time. I understand it was mom, and perhaps the nurse thought that with mom sleeping, and having medical assistance so close by that there wouldnt be so many people staying in the room for such an extended period of time.

    With you almost graduating, havent you come across a similar situation during clinicals?

    Hope your mom does get healed soon. BTW, hospitals will usually send out a questionaire regarding the visit. Be sure to place your concerns there.

    The pain issue happened as I was getting ready to walk out the door. My father and sister said they would deal with the situation. I had children I had to go tend to.

    FWIW, This hospital specifically made these rooms bigger when they rebuilt. They are private rooms that are bigger than my bedroom. They did this for the family and the staff to have more room. There wasn't any limit on the amount of visitors. The only visitors she had were her husband, 2 daughters, and 1 son. Now with that being said, the most that were ever there were 3 people and that was only for a couple of hours other than that it was 1 or 2.

    Nursing school isn't my first carnival in this field. I've dealt with families that you couldn't even imagine...if you think some of these people are bad in the hospital you should see them at home....but that being said, no matter what my personal views of them were, I still had to act respectful and in a professional manner.


    Also FWIW, on the pt. side of things, this isn't the first issue I've had with a nurse. I was 8 hrs. post c section and told to get into the bathtub, when I told the nurse I wasn't supposed to take a bath she yelled and said I better get my butt in the tub and while I'm at it pull off my bandage and throw it in the trash....she then proceeded to put my percocet on my tray table and leave the room talking about how messy the bed was....you bet she was reported to the physician who then reported it to the hospital administration.


    People keep asking me to report the nurse in my mother's case. I do keep in mind that she was probably just having a bad day and hate to get anyone in trouble esp a nurse since it is such a difficult and trying job. I did however want to know for my own future reference what others thought was justifiable in being rude to a pt. or their family whether or not you could do what they asked. There is such thing as being understanding of other people's situations and I feel that as a caretaker of a pt/client my being understanding of their situation is more important than expecting them to be understanding of my career. This can all be done with tone of voice and choice of words.
  11. by   momofqc
    Quote from cherrybreeze
    I absolutely love that you are explaining how things work to the people that do it everyday, when you yourself do not.

    Who does those things? I do. Again, you're speaking in absolutes.....that either the nurse wants NO family present, or wants them to do everything. WHOLE lot of middle ground there. In case you missed it, I am one of those nurses that works on a med/surg floor, and while we ARE very busy, I wouldn't say that I don't have time to do "everything" for an immediate post op patient. That's my job. I do everything, and if you'd believe the patient feedback, do it damn well. Do you think that a patient that has no family that CAN be there, doesn't get those things done for them? Think again.

    You didn't get your chair. Get over it now. We're not the ones who didn't get you your chair. Did you ever stop to think that, after you had asked once, that your nurse didn't FORGET? Maybe it wasn't possible. Have you honestly not had an experience in your life where someone has made a request of you more than once, when you in fact just had not yet had time to address it? It's insulting. You have no idea what that "room full of furniture" actually was, but you make plenty of assumptions about it, don't you?

    I realize you didn't "say a word" during the whole thing (although based on this thread, I'm starting to doubt it). I didn't say that you did, I said if you had the same ATTITUDE, which I'm sure you know can be conveyed perfectly well while remaining silent.

    once again, you're not reading everything. I said it wasn't about the actually "getting the darn chair" it was about tone and what she actually said. I have 2 children, I am asked for the same thing 15 times before I can answer...so yes I know what it's like to be asked more than once. In this case it was us asking twice within 2 1/2 hrs. And I'll state it again, I saw a friend who happens to be a nurse on that floor, she said the room of extra furniture was just that extra beds, chairs, and IV poles. So I'm not making assumptions.

    I didn't have any attitude. I sat quietly with my computer and smiled and said hi. I don't know how that can be construed as having a bad attitude. The nurse herself actually was pleasant until she had left and then come back..after that she wasn't so pleasant and we hadn't asked her for anything at that point.
  12. by   momofqc
    Quote from caliotter3
    If any of this bothered the OP's mother, I certainly hope she took the opportunity to put her complaints on the post hosp questionnaire she received or will receive. If no survey, then a formal complaint should be made to the hospital.

    Added: And then be done with the matter.

    If this didn't bother my mother I wouldn't have given 2 rats arses. !
  13. by   It'sMe, RN, BBA, MBA
    Quote from cherrybreeze
    I respectfully disagree. I've worked on a med/surg floor for 8 years. Just because it's not an ICU doesn't mean that "oh the patient voided" is good enough, not by far. The majority of our surgeons write "STRICT I&O" and they mean it. If the numbers aren't there on the graphic, they raise hell. I need to be the one (or my CNA) getting them up and watching what they drink, because YES, I do need to know how much it was in both cases. It really chaps my arse when I find out later they've had three cans of soda that I didn't know about, that someone brought them, because it throws off my numbers and I DO have to answer for that.

    Yes, it IS nice when there is family that can help them with basic cares, but it's not as easy as having every patient have someone there, and all the care gets done. Not by a LONG shot. I couldn't imagine starting a day the way you described, and basically demanding their family come in and do all of those things for them. That's ridiculous. Yes, my patient load has grown over the years as expectations change, but I still do all of the things for my patients that I used to do . It's MY job. EXPECTING family to do the walks, baths, bathroom trips, and for pete's sake I&O is both irresponsible and unreasonable.
    I think I didn't make myself clear. I don't demand they do anything, I ask them what they are comfortable doing. And of course nothing that requires a state sanction practice item, such as a MD order for stict I&O us ever allowed to be done by a lay person. But anyone with a patient that is routine I&O can jot down that the patient had a bowel movement. You don't have to have a RN license to do that, at least in my state. And again, I would love to do it all for my patients but the reality is that I can't. And I don't think anyone else can either. Not on a real active surgical floor.

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