Torn between jobs

Nurses General Nursing

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Not sure if this is the correct forum to place this question but I have a dilemma that I need advice from you all.

I'm currently a stay at home working mom as a medical transcriptionist who is on my local community college's nursing wait list. I've been offered a unit secretary position at a hospital which is the 3-11:30 shift and I am torn as to what to do. My heart tells me to stay at home with the kids but everyone I have talked to has said that the experience as a US would be great for when I finally get into nursing school. The hospital job also offers better health insurance than what my husband gets and better benefits than I get as a home based MT (no benefits, independent contractor) If I take the job I will only see my family for an hour in the morning and on weekends. Should I listen to my heart and stay put or do what might be better for the future and our pocketbook with regard to a more stable job and better benefits than I currently have? Has anyone been in this situation where they had kids at home and worked the 3-11:30 shift?

Any advice you can offer would be greatly appreciated!!

Ophelia78

103 Posts

Specializes in ICU, L&D, Home Health.

I don't have any children yet, but I have worked the 3-11 shift for many years. I hated not seeing my husband except as two ships passing in the night...I never worked in a hospital during nursing school and it made no difference when it came to landing my ICU intern position. I learned what I needed to know in my long orientation. I just accepted a day position. I'm not getting the extra $4/hr shift diff. but I'm a million times happier, and that's worth more than the money. What seems worse to you- not seeing your family or having less money? If you truly need the money a sacrifice in time might be worth it. As for me, we felt we really didn't need cable and my old Honda still has some life left in her. For us, spending time with family and friends is our #1 priority.

P.S. A friend works medical transcription from home and I would kill to have her job! Unfortunately, I can't type at a hummingbird's pace...

tkhayman

59 Posts

HI,

Although i do not have kids i have worked 3-11p.m shift. It can be very tiring you get home and can;t sleep right away, and may sometimes wake up later during the day.

I can suggest a family meeting to talk it out with your husband and kids (if they are old enought to understand), this way everyone can participitate in the decison making process.

When you do eventually get into nursing school that too is going to require a lot of hard work, it is almost like having another full time job. Then you would have to juggle the 3-11 shifts and classes and clinical rotations. I say this FYI.

Good luck and i know you will make the right decision.

Aaron-RN

24 Posts

Specializes in ER / Trauma.

I understand your situation. I would accept the job at the hospital. I am a senior in a BSN program and have worked in both a Pediatric Medical Office and most recently at a hospital for 2 years. The hospital experience has been invaluable to me. I learned so much as a Tech (we also do some secretary work). I know about common orders, medications, etc, etc. Yes the shift is not desirable. I worked 3-11 for a while and made out ok, but then again I am not married with kids. Maybe the hospital will allow you to work part-time. I work as a 0.5 FTE (3 12's in 2 weeks) and share my job with a classmate of mine who also works 3 12's in 2 weeks. This way, the hospital benefits from having a full time position filled and we benefit because we can work part time and get some amazing experience. Maybe they can work something like thsi out for you.

Good Luck!!!-- Arbys1595

Specializes in FNP, Peds, Epilepsy, Mgt., Occ. Ed.

I wouldn't take it. I don't think the experience would make up for what you would be missing with your kids. When you get into nursing school, that's a big enough time commitment.

I know other people have already told you this, probably many times, but your kids will grow up a lot faster than you think. These years will fly by! Experience you can get later, but you won't have the time with the kids.

I have a 17 year old and an almost-21 year old and sometimes wonder what happened to those babies?? They are good kids and we have a good relationship but still....

This is my :twocents: anyway.

fultzymom

645 Posts

I can tell you from my experience with second shift et a child that it is horrible. You never get to be an actual family. I never got to see hubby because I had to get my daughter to the sitter before he got home from work et although you feel like you have all day to be with her, by the time you get breakfast et lunch, get ready for work, et get housework done, the time is gone. I would never go through that again. This is JMHO.

justme1972

2,441 Posts

How old are your children? That would probably make a difference to me.

GIRN

116 Posts

It's a tough call. That time though, in the late afternoon until bedtime, is a special time with kids. Even though I'm generalizing and being chauvanistic...the kids don't have the same homey feeling in the house if Mom isn't there. The experience would help you a great deal in school. But is it worth it. As someone already said, when you start school you're not going to see your kids very much. During that time, even when you're home, you're constantly reading and studying and thinking about school. I went back to nursing school when my kids were in elementary school and while I love nursing, I wish now that I wouldn't have lost so much time away from them. I'll always remember a nurse telling me that if she had one thing to do over again, she wouldn't have taken the 3-11 shift and left her husband home to watch the kids. She said they didn't feel like a family and I know her kids didn't turn out as she wished. (So have I completely alienated all the Dads and 3-11 shifters out there???) Good luck with this decision!

studentnurse3

80 Posts

How old are your children? That would probably make a difference to me.

My children are 12, 8 and 4 (5 in August). I would see the two boys for about an hour in the morning before I take them to school and then my youngest I will see for a few hours in the a.m. and then take her to preschool and then take her to a drop in center until hubby can pick her up and pick up my 8 year old at the after school care. Does it get easier as they get older (to be away from them)?

SunnyAZRN

14 Posts

Here is my .02 cents worth... I would stay at your current job. As a mom, let me tell you, you do not get those years back with your kids. They grow up so fast and you have years and years to work in the career you enjoy. Go with your gut... if your heart is telling you to stay at your current job then do it- otherwise you may be miserable.

justme1972

2,441 Posts

Here is my .02 cents worth... I would stay at your current job. As a mom, let me tell you, you do not get those years back with your kids. They grow up so fast and you have years and years to work in the career you enjoy. Go with your gut... if your heart is telling you to stay at your current job then do it- otherwise you may be miserable.

This is true too....You'll never look back and say, "Gee, I wished I had spent more time at work."

whartonjelly

20 Posts

Children need a happy mom and dad no matter what you choose. Dont count on being one up just because of the job offer. As long as you can feel joy every day the kids will learn by your example.

after 30 years of all shifts all types of nursing, My kids are now a RN, A Dental Hygeinist, and a Teacher. No tatooes, no drugs, no piercings. No criminal records!!

During their pre and teen years i worked 11 to 7 to be available to them . Also their friends knew that there was always an adult in the home. I could alwys re arrange my sleeping to be able to do things with them.

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