Teachers and Nurses - page 2
Hi everyone. I have aol and recently I went over to the "educators" message board to ask some teachers their advice. My son is developmentally delayed and I wanted to ask their opinions regarding... Read More
Apr 8, '02Well, for what it's worth. I went through grade school, high school and college in single sex schools. Then I got adventurous and went to grad school in a male dominated field. Needing to make a living, I went to nursing school, at a women's college. I immediately noticed two things: 1) the pervasiveness of what I call female *****iness, and 2) the tendancy to hitch up one's skirt to straighten a slip or pull down a blouse in public (women don't do this in mixed groups but freely do it when just among women.)
I think the two are related. We as women are more comfortable in our skins in a single sex setting, more likely to say what we think and feel. It isn't always pretty.
Apr 8, '02I am a teacher who is thinking about going into nursing--this subject seemed too good to pass up! At my elementary school quit honestly most everybody was sincere and helped each other out-honestly! When I stumbled onto this bb I was quit in shock and almost questioned my decision to go back to school to become a nurse, a lot of negativity about the profession displayed on this bb. Then I came to the realization--every profession has negative things about it if you look at them that way. We each choose how we view things, each other, the work. If we choose to gossip and back stab, in any profession, it is my belief it will come back to you.
Just my thoughts!
Apr 8, '02jhrn
please be assurred it not like this at every nursing job. Though it is at some. Please remember this BB is a place where we can safely blow off steam. This site provides anonymity which in itself is safty.
Apr 8, '02I don't know if its a male thing or a female thing but I know that I hate it.
I'm in nursing school right now and the infighting and gossip and cattiness is totally out of control. I think CEN is right, that there will always be people you do/do not get along with, and I don't know if its a female thing, but it seems to be a has-a-little-too-much-time-on-their-hands thing.
I go to school full time, I work full time, I have a home to take care of, other responsibilities, I couldn't give a flying you-know-what what Sally got on her test or how drunk Jake got over the weekend. I can't understand people who take pleasure in this sort of thing.
I just take care of my sh*t and leave everyone to all their gossip and catty comments. Maybe it will make them feel better about themselves, probably not. Either way, I'm not a part of it. Call me antisocial if you want, I don't mind.
I just don't get why people are so much more willing to cut somebody down when it takes less effort to boost them up.
Apr 8, '02Originally posted by Nrs2b71
I have aol and recently I went over to the "educators" message board to ask some teachers their advice. My son is developmentally delayed and I wanted to ask their opinions regarding his education.
Anyways, as I was casually surfing through their board I noticed a very interesting trend. They are as bad, if not WORSE than us when it comes to fighting with each other! At least the ones on the aol message board are. Now since they all have bachelor's degrees they dont spend time arguing about each others level of education. But they are constantly nit- picking and trying to one up each other. A seemingly innocent statement can end up turing into a long drawn out fight quite easily and their is alot of tit for tat going on.
So maybe, just maybe all of our fighting isnt just a nurse thing but more of a female thing (god I would hate to admit that but maybe it is true?)
I hope this makes at least a few people feel a little better about nursing. I was begining to get very discouraged about nursing and was starting to wonder if maybe alot of disfunctional people were attracted to the profession. I am saddened that their is so much bickering between teachers, but at the same time, I'm relieved that its not just a nursing thing.
Hoping everyone is having a great weekend!
Apr 8, '02MsPurp,
That is so true. too much time on thier hands. You are too bussy to tear others down because you are too bussy building a life.
It's the old crab effect. You know, when there is a bucket of crabs and one tries to climb out; the other crabs pull him back down into the bucket. Don't worry about them they'll do enough of that for themselves.
Apr 8, '02As an Army Waivers Clerk I worked around mostly men. Love this part, I had 135 male recuiters coming to me because their recruits couldn't get in without the waiver. TRUST ME when I say it is not just a female thing. We are just more educationally articulated and more imaginative in how and what we say. Men tend to be more aggressive, combative, take-no-prisoners, and throw it in your face type confrontationally. They also are getting a little (and I stress LITTLE) better at understanding that they can't equate all things with a particular part of the anatomy, either theirs or yours. I did learn to have them eating out of my hand because they did learn that they had to play nice or I would take my toys (typewriter and 'accepted' stamp)to play someplace else. A day of silence while waiting for their waiver worked wonders. hehehehehehehehe.
Apr 8, '02Stirlady,
I hear you. I spent 12 years in the Army where I was most often the only female. It's a people thing. The biggest (and actually about the only, now that I think of it) backbiter, tattler, and "catty" person were I work (small hospital) is a man.
It's a people thing.
Apr 8, '02I know that my husband and I have very different ways of dealing with conflict.
For example: he will come home after work complaining about one co-worker or another, saying how much of an ass this person is because of some disagreement they got into...yet he will turn around a few days later, and tell me that he and this same co-worker are going to stop off at the bar for a couple of beers after work.
Now if that was me...Im sure not going to be getting any cocktails with the person I was so upset with just a few short days ago. Frankly I would still feel slighted or hurt or whatever..and the disagreement would be too fresh in my mind to want to be buddy buddy with them again so soon.
Now is this a general difference in the way men and women deal with conflict....or is this difference mainly an individual thing?...Im not sure. Of course there will always be an exception to the rule but I wonder if other women frequently notice this difference too.
Apr 8, '02Also wanted to say thanks to PRMENRS for posting that great link. It was very informative and just what I was looking for.
Apr 8, '02Wholeheartedly agree, Stirlady and Agnus...it is a people thang, and a sociology 'people in groups' thang!
Also feel there's a lot of truth in points about nursing as an oppressed group....and the lack of respect for our profession...we are still seen and portrayed by many as overpaid handmaidens, (Hillary's quote), servants, bedpan pushers, low class, akin to prostitutes, etc. If I had actually known all this before I went into nursing, I probably would have run for my life! LOL!
Guys seem more competitively "in your face" by nature; sometimes they adapt to the prevailing environment and become even MORE catty and underhanded than the rest of their nurse group.... Boy have I seen a few of these.
But it's dog eat dog in a man's world too...make no mistake..they just may go about it a bit more obviously. Remember it's never been 'feminine' for women to APPEAR too competitive....so some disguise it...LOL!
Teachers...well the NEA has successfully united them and as a group I feel they have better wages, respect and benefits than nurses. They work within a stifling bureaucracy though and have a tough, tough job today...most teachers I know feel they have very little personal voice, and are punished if they are display independent thought or action within their school system. Sad. I remember my best and favorite teachers as those who WERE 'their own person'...that's what caught my attention and motivated me to be a free thinker.
Apr 8, '02Same thing happens to us men, however we have several fool proof ways to deal with conflict that women are not allowed to know about!
Since I am actively engaging in number 2 I wil tell ya!
1. Take the SOB outside and feed him his spleen, then forget everything!
2. Take the SOB to a bar. Both of you down 20 shots, the one standing wins. Then you forget about everything!
3. Drop our pants.. one closest to the floor wins. Then you both forget about everything.
Bottome line do not hold grudges, women remember everythng ever said to them, ever percieved insult, slight, injustice and it just festers inside them.
women alway say they cant understand men. This is because wmen are so complicated that they no longer can understand the basic thought processed of us men.
We need food!
We need TV!
We need loven!!
We need our Toys!!!
If anything distract from these it is not worth getting bothered by.
Lov'ya all ladies!!
Apr 8, '02ROFL!!!
Zhakrin you are too much!! Your post was funny, but also realistic, at least IMHO.
Thanks for the laugh and also the insight