Should I stop to help?

Nurses General Nursing

Published

So, on my way to work last night, I was approached at an intersection by a man motioning me to roll down my window. I shake my head no, and proceed to drive onward. Now, call me paranoid, but I did not see any signs of active bleeding or acute distress, and well, it was dark. I have watched too many crime shows. Anyway, as a healthcare provider, I do feel obligated to stop and help if someone were in obvious acute distress, but some stranger approaching my car? I didn't just fall off the turnip truck, as the saying goes.

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No, you need to protect yourself, first and foremost! You can be of no help to the people who really need you (friends, family, patients, etc.) if you're dead from getting murdered!

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Please always put your safety first. If there is truly an emergency just use your cell phone to call for assistance.

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Specializes in Flight, ER, Transport, ICU/Critical Care.

No.

No.

No.

May be innocent act or may (more likely) be a situation you are not equipped to handle safely. (Unless you have back-up. Maybe a taser or gun and the know how to use both. Blow dart filled with ketamine? :eek: )

Please tell me that you did not consider getting out of your SAFE car to stop beside the road for someone you did not know, to assist with some unknown, not readily apparent "crisis" (not that THAT matters in most cases) that has a strange acting man motioning you out of your vehicle at NIGHT (not that daylight stops bad acts)???

Obligated to stop and help? Really. Alone, at night - getting our of your vehicle and onto the side of road? PLEASE RECONSIDER.

Call 911 notify a person in road trying to stop vehicles - give location and description. The POLICE will see that this person gets whatever help they require. The LIFE you SAVE may very well be your OWN.

Stay SAFE!

:angel:

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Specializes in Post Anesthesia.

car on its side with smoke comming out of a few places- I'll stop- If they can walk, I will drive on ASAP. Hasteling with a drug addict who wants 1) a ride home/to a bar, 2) to borrow some $$$ cause he is "hungry", 3) wants to put a gun in my face so he can make his own decisions about my car. The odds are in the favor the wrong kind of trouble is the person is upright and motioning. In a real emergance- jumping up and down and yelling for help is a bit more effective. If it isn't urgent enough to do that- it isn't urgent enough to have me stop.

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I was at an intersection like you mentioned rolled my window down a crack and he asked me for money! If it had of been a gun or something screw that red light!!!

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You did the right thing.

I grew up in a fairly rough neighborhood and I can tell you listen to your gut.

I have a perfect and true story about an experience I had when I was a kid. In fact, I have several. I tell these stories to my kids. My ex thought I was paranoid. But, I don't know... I wonder if I would still be around if I hadn't listened to my gut.

Your story reminded me of an incident when I was a young adult.

Not as good a story as the childhood incident, but similar to yours:

In my old hood (lol) my bank was located downtown right next to/under a railroad bridge that went over a busy street.

I wouldn't go there at night to withdraw money because some pretty creepy people came out of the woodwork-- or out from under the bridge-- at night. I'm sure they kept an eye out for stupid people using the ATM there at night (and I didn't know anyone dumb enough to do it).

So, I'm pretty cautious. So you may think I'm going to tell you a maniac came out of the shadows or something... but no.

Broad daylight, I'm leaving the ATM. I'm waiting for traffic to pass so I can turn out of the parking lot.

As I turn my head to the right, I hear a bang on my window and a flip on my door handle!

I spin a look to my left and there, at my window, is a middle-aged woman with a stroller.

She tells me, "Hey Lady, I don't have no ride home for me and my baby and I ain't got no money. Could you give me a ride?"

Now, I'm just waiting for a chance to turn!

I told her, "No" and inched forward to make it clear, I was done.

"Lady, my baby ain't feelin' good and I need to get home. You won't help my baby?"

Then she said the magic words, "Why not? I ain't gonna do nothin' to you!"

HELLO.

When you say that... I know it isn't right... and I'm not safe.

Trust me, when somebody says that, the intent was there.

No. I didn't help her. I blatantly ignored her until I could make a right turn out.

Is it possible I blew off a poor woman in need of help?

I suppose, but my gut told me it was wrong.

And I'm sure you could spot a quite few red flags in my story.

Listen to your gut.

Use common sense.

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I'm still waiting for the finale(umph) to the above story:mad:

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Specializes in Intermediate care.

you made the right decision!!! You need to protect yourself, and being a healthcare provider does not mean you have to help everyone and everything you come across. It is not your obligation to put your safety at risk. Besides, how would that man know you were a nurse anyway?? My guess is there was nothing wrong that you could have done.

On that same note- We had a case in our state,not too long ago where some people got a hold of an undercover cop car. They went on a dark highway with hardly any traffic. they were pulling people over and robbing them. (these are NOT cops). but people thought just because they were cops it was ok to pull over. My cousin (a police officer) told me about it, and told me it was OK to keep going and not pull over as long as you 1) put your flashers on or 2) call the police station and tell them the situation and you will be pulling over when you get near more traffic and lighted area. So basically, just don't pull over, even for a cop in a secluded area.

Just be smart :) its sad that now days we have to resort to things like this...

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I'm still waiting for the finale(umph) to the above story:mad:

You mean mine?

lol

My point was that that woman had bad intentions.

I'll bet dollars to donuts:

There was no baby in the stroller

That woman was waiting for someone to stop at that ATM

That woman thought I looked vulnerable

I was going to be robbed.

I'm glad to say there was no finale because, while I may have a moment's struggle with my conscience, my gut told me this was a bad situation.

I think in nursing, our instinct is to help... that makes us vulnerable in times when we just shouldn't help... we just need to get the **** out.

Sorry if my story was long-winded :p

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I'm still waiting for the finale(umph) to the above story:mad:

That was the ending to my story...I didn't roll down the window, shook my head no, he walked away, and I continued on my journey to work. :) Before I was a nurse, the thought would have never crossed my mind to help some random dude approaching my car.

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You mean mine?

lol

My point was that that woman had bad intentions.

I'll bet dollars to donuts:

There was no baby in the stroller

That woman was waiting for someone to stop at that ATM

That woman thought I looked vulnerable

I was going to be robbed.

I'm glad to say there was no finale because, while I may have a moment's struggle with my conscience, my gut told me this was a bad situation.

I think in nursing, our instinct is to help... that makes us vulnerable in times when we just shouldn't help... we just need to get the **** out.

Sorry if my story was long-winded :p

I was wondering the same thing...yours or mine?

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