should I stay or should I go now???? (warning: long and drawn out thread!)

  1. First of all, let me send out a big DA BEARS!!!!! straight from the south side of Chicago!!!! I am sure EVERYONE in my area and Indiana (which I love as well) is looking forward to this superbowl for sure!!!!! That being said, I also want to say HELLO! and Nice to meet you to all of the new people here! Seems like an intelligent and invigorating crowd has stepped in!!!! Just the kind I need to ask advice from!!!!! Here goes:

    I am a new RN (just got my license in the mail 2 weeks ago, Yippeee!) After a lengthy time off from work (6 months--that is long for me!), I jumped at the chance to begin work license pending at a very nice hospital approx. 30 mins from home. Now let me start by saying--I HATE DRIVING! Period. But this hospital is huge, very well run by Illinois' standards (explanation of that remark upon request only!), and most everyone there is very kind, intelligent, and supportive of a new grad fool like me! While I oriented (or orientated, whichever you prefer) on days for 8 weeks, I was a star!!!! "Michelle, you are great", and "No way you are a new grad, you are so smart!" Well, my head barely fit into the elevator on my way out! haha! My preceptor was this wonderful male nurse who I got along with GREAT!! I may even attend his upcoming wedding this Sept! You all know what they say, all good things must come to an end...I got hired for full-time 3p-11p--not what I wanted, but what they so desperately needed. Weeelll, I desperately needed to get to work, so I took it. I now see why they are in such dire need! Terrible shift that 3-11 is!!!! Started on the 8th of January and I am being precepted now by a nit-picking, chiding, supervisor who has no tolerance for a fool like me! She is a nice woman, don't get me wrong, but she is a terrible preceptor. PERIOD. I want out--badly. Sound like a quitter? Maybe. BUT--there is more to this dilemma--there is a small hospital (and I mean small, but it holds it's own in this big city, somehow, for over 50 years) that I actually worked at in the admitting dept back in '98! Worked there for over 3 years and quit on good terms to pursue my education in nursing. I even did my med-surg clinicals there with a wonderful CI who has offered me a full time position when I am ready. This small hospital is exactly 12 mins from home, and that is excellent for me. I know over 50% of the employees, had many friends, some that I still speak with to this day. But the other hospital has so much more to offer in a career sense, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!!!!
    Should I stay at this big place and learn to deal with a difficult drive and an even more difficult boss?? BTW, this week was supposed to be the week I went off orientating, but Ms. Thing told the higher ups that I was slow with reading charts!!!! HELLOOOOO! I was a unit secretary for over 3 years! I can read doctor's handwriting with the best of 'em!!!! Let me also mention that another new hire who is also a new grad, who BTW hasn't done HALF the clinical setting skills that I have, (start IV's, draw from a PICC, start a Foley, etc, and I know this because she told me this herself) IS ALREADY OFF ORIENTATION!!!!! AAAaaaarrrrrggghhh! That totally busted my bubble-head!!!!! I wanted to cry the eve I found that out. To make matters worse, they put her on her own on a quiet Sunday with 5 pts and NO admissions. I always get 6pts with at least one new admission, sometimes 2!!!! So you all know they will continue that when I am on my own!!!! I am so upset about the whole thing. I have already wrote 2 letters stating the problems that I am having with my preceptor, but to NO avail. She is a boss, and she has been there 16+ years, what chance do I have??? ZIP. I went to work early today to meet with the other bosses and I can see that even though they want to help, they won't.
    Now if I go to this smaller place, I will work just as hard and probably go through the same crap (hey welcome to nursing, buckaroo) and I am ready for it. I work hard at whatever I do. I am NOT whining about the work, don't get me wrong, but I at least will be A) closer to home and 2) surrounded by familiar faces. Any thoughts or advice would be greatly appreciated. WHeeew! Even if no one replies, I feel so much better to get all of that off my chest!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I truly LOVE! Bye 4 now!
  2. Visit chelli73 profile page

    About chelli73, ADN, RN

    Joined: Jan '03; Posts: 254; Likes: 27
    RN; from US
    Specialty: 11 year(s) of experience


  3. by   chelli73
    PS- Forgot to mention, I love med-surg! That is where I want to be for at least one year. But I may just stay with med-surg. It's my heart.... That is where I am now, but the smaller hospital offers good tele experience, yuck!
  4. by   canoehead
    The first preceptor, where you are a new grad and are oustanding on orientation, it just sounds too good to be true to me. You are probably a great nurse, but there is always lots to learn with a new job, even after years of experience.

    The second preceptor may be tougher, and not as easy going, but it would be wise to learn all you can from her even if you feel it is unfair. Take the tough assignments and learn from them, but I would avoid complaining about an established staff member. It's more politically correct for other staff to see you being polite and hardworking in the early days rather than "assertive."
  5. by   DDRN4me
    Chelli.. you didnt say how long you have been with the second nurse. Perhaps if you sat with her and asked her for a timeline on when she thought you could be on your own . and what she thought you needed to work on. You may need to swallow your pride and suck it up but it sounds like she is well respected and has probably oriented many nurses so she knows what it takes to get you up and running . It is very different being on your own on an off shift without the supports you have on days; perhaps she is preparing you for that. Give it a little longer; but if you still feel this way then you are not helping yourself or the hospital. Good luck!! Mary
  6. by   MrsWampthang
    I'd go with the smaller hospital, closer to home. Sometimes a long drive is worth it if you love what you do, but if you hate what you do, then you just end up resenting the drive. I wouldn't want to see you end up hating nursing because you hate your job. Just a thought. Good luck.

  7. by   traumaRUs
    I live in IL too and personally I say try to hang in there. My experience with the smaller hospitals is that they don't get the acute things that a larger hospital does. That said, it helps immensely to have some solid very busy, large hospital experience before you go to a small hospital. I would suggest that you sit down with current preceptor and say, "What do I need to do to improve my performance?" Then, listen, take what she says to heart and look at it honestly. If what she says has merit, follow her advice. If, on the other hand, you feel that she is indeed nit-picking, then I would talk to your unit educator about changing preceptors. Sometimes personalities don't mesh well. I have precepted many new nurses. Most of our relationships worked out well. However, there were one or two where our personalities just didn't mesh well. I had to bite my tongue and realize that I wasn't THE preceptor for ALL nurses. It is a bit humbling, but must be done.
  8. by   cookie102
    i'd go with the smaller hospital, closer to home is a big plus! i am sure you are a very good nurse, some people resent being preceptors (don't know why they do it then), but i'd rather see you happy in a job than loose yet another good nurse to the profession.
  9. by   fetch33
    I'd see if I could change preceptors or change units. Sometimes it just isn't a good fit. I had an orientee last year that actually switched units because the preceptor was difficult for her to get along with. She fit in great with us, so I don't know what the problem was. A bigger hospital will give you much broader experience than a smaller one... PLUS they tend to pay much better.
  10. by   gitterbug
    Sounds like the new preceptor wants you to have a solid footing before she actually cuts the strings. Not too bad really, since we know any off shift can be full of new experiences for any nurse. While I cannot say go to the smaller facility, I cannot tell you to stay where you are if you are truly unhappy. I just know that the larger facility will afford you a more rounded
    experience in dealing with all types of patients. Good luck and remember that nothing lasts forever.
  11. by   chelli73
    Thanks to all who have given me the wonderful insight so far!!! I knew I was at the right place for some knowledge. Believe me, I humble myself to anyone with more experience than me in nursing, and this preceptor is no exception. I see where others don't respect her and I make sure to fill that gap with an extra dose of respect from me! My grandma taught me so! My issues with her are that she seems to confuse me (purposefully?) whilst I am in the middle of doing one thing! I understand I must learn to be multi-tasking, but through MY thoughts, not hers. And there have been times when she has outed me like the new grad that I am in an inappropriate manner: asking me what a particularly new med was actually for--IN FRONT OF THE PT I AM ABOUT TO GIVE IT TO!!! Even the higher-ups said that was a no-no. I am not in clinical anymore, and even on my worst clinical day no CI ever asked me about a med IN FRONT of a pt...The med btw was Avapro, BP med? I still burn when I think about it, 'cause when she asked me my mind went blank....