Sometimes you learn more about the meaning of life from your patients than your own life experiences. Also, there's nothing like going home & saying to yourself, I really helped that patient & that family. I've felt this many of a time on the oncology/med-surg unit I work on. I enjoy working w/ hospice patients, I like being there for the patient and his/her family. This is one reason why I thought I might leave floor nursing (after my one year experience in the hospital) and go into hospice nursing. I want to learn more about hospice nursing before I go into it. I also thought I might enjoy psych nursing. I like comforting people emotionally, I enjoy listening to people, & sometimes the best thing you can do is listen.
I've learned a lot in Oncology. I access ports and discontinue PICC lines. I've learned so much and it's only been six months; I think this and the patients keep me there.
When I first graduated nursing school this past May, I wanted to become an Onc nurse & get chemo therapy certified. That has changed. I think the dynamics between staff members & mgt has been a little overwhelming for me. My preceptor was burnt out and hated her job. My boss is constantly calling people into her office, (including me) to find why this happened...ect.
I recently found myself in a rather overwhelming situation last week. Yesterday I was called into the office regarding the situation.
Here's the skinny... The patient's primary doctor complained that stat labs were not reported to him like they should have been. I told my two boss' that this piece of information was not passed a long in report. Another thing they asked me is why I didn't bladder scan the patient when it was initally suggested to do so. I admitted that I got immediately preoccupied, (I had a patient that was trying to climb out of bed naked). They then asked if anyone offered to help me. I said, no not until everything started to go down hill. My boss' told me that they were impressed with my charting of the event & were surprised that I was able to indentify crackles as a new grad. They also told me that anytime a doc orders IM or IV lasix that the patient needs to be seen, I nodded my head. My boss' said they are going to treat this as a learning experience and talk to everyone involved. Then we are all going to meet to discuss the matter.
I feel that the CRF & chronic liver failure patient was very acute and not an appropriate pt. for a new grad. I also feel that having all new nurses on, (w/ one experienced, LPN & thank god for the experienced LPN) was not good. Also, having a doctor that was yelling at me because I wanted to call report to the ICU even though it was shift change, was not helpful. I called ICU anyway and got my patient up there as fast as I could.
I was honest and only hope that I'm not going to make enemies because I told the truth. I'm trying to get my mind off of the situation but it's very difficult. Questions like, "Do you feel comfortable working w/ OncNewbie" were asked and I just wonder what does it all mean? Maybe I feel this way because it's my first time getting called into the office like this. Anyhow, I don't like feeling like I'm walking on thin ice all the time. I requested to work on days because I feel I have a lot more to learn & I honestly feel like I'll have more support on days. But I don't know if another job is in the works because this is all a little too much. I have a scholarship
w/ the hospital and don't want to have to pay it back; which I will have to if I don't give them a full year. But money is not everything and my husband says but honey you're making so much money and it's true but money is not everything. What about getting back to why I went into nursing in the first place, to make a difference in people's lives.