the time is 3:44am and i am supposed to take my final in about 6 hrs. i don't feel confident about my status as my quiz scores are less than desirable and this is the hardest class i have ever taken 3--that's right 3 times. OB/GYN is truly the thorn in my side. let me elaborate pls, and hope that if anyone ever had to face a similiar experience w/wo a happy ending pls feel free to enlighten me.
i first entered OB in jan 04, whereupon i failed the class by three points due to some extreme personal problems (my husband of 14yrs left me with 3 sad kids, no car, or money) well i rebuilt all that he destroyed (got a job, bought the neighbor's car, paid the rent at a new apt, and consoled my babes), and re-enrolled for the class. well, at that point i felt that i mastered the concept of maternal and infant health care, but nonetheless failed again--this time by one point!!!! i actually got an 84% on the final, passed the clinical portion w/a breeze (as always) but my quiz scores brought me down. however, being the fighter that i am (as always)i filed an appeal to reenter the adn program (you are out if you fail the same class 2 times) to which i so badly wanted to succeed in. i was granted re-entry after writing a 5 pager outlining my extenuating circumstances. well, at that point, i began to feel numb (dumb) about the entire process, completely doubting all of my knowledge (it had let me down twice already!) so here i am again for the 3rd time, in almost the same position!!! my quiz scores will be the death of this dream, as i am at a 79.1% IF my instructor drops the lowest score. NOW i have found out that a teaching care plan that was due will count as a test grade!!! I gave her mine early, she made notes req further explanation and handed it back to me (it worked the first time) and the day it was due AGAIN, i was out sick (really sick, even called in at work), so will she give me a fat zero??? will she not accept the corrections that i made? will i fail this class and be done with the whole thing? i am at my wits end...and by the way my kids are beyond consolation--my 16 yr old ran away in jan, she is residing with her 21 yr old boyfriend (f!@#ing creep) and only calls my grandmother to check in for money. i am feeling so helpless here, my 14 and 13 yr old sons are my only strength but i will feel like such a disappointment if i fail...what to do, what to do.......
