Need advice about an MD harrassing staff.. - page 2
please note - this thread was originally posted in 2001 - nurse ratched 5/12/04 hi all, i need some desperate advice about one of our doctors at the clinic. i hate to be long winded, but i... Read More
Jul 31, '01Well, I am rather stunned by some of the remarks regarding this obvious sexual harassment. First of all, this is not just a woman's issue. Men can be sexually harassed in the work place, too. About 200 claims a year are filed by men. In addition, gender discrimination was added to the Civil Rights Act of 1964 by men. Indeed, it was added by conservative men who thought it would make the bill fail. It didn't. (And just how many radical man-hating feminists were there in 1964?)
The items that disturb me the most are:
1) The fact that this doctor has already had affairs with 2 nurses and 1 MA. I wonder if these women felt pressured at all? Were they given special treatment at work? Or were they threatened with termination? This is such a red flag!! I would definitely investigate this and question these women, if I were this employer.
2) The doctor's comment to EMaas that-"In my office we talk and we flirt and if you don't like that you can leave." He is making it a condition of her employment to put up with his crap. She has repeatedly told him to stop and has let him know that it makes her uncomfortable. He chases after her if she walks away. Who's the dog in heat here, nurs4kids?
3) This kind of behavior DOES escalate and usually leads to touching, especially when you have an employer that is looking the other way. He has already invaded her personal space. He shut the door and cornered her in his office!!
Aug 1, '01Feisty,
I agree, he's a pretty pathetic person..mostly for the comment about "if you don't like it leave". Affair is a strong word. Is it okay if he was merely "dating" these women? I guess I just have a bit too much self esteem, but there is no way I'd be pressured into anything. There are nursing jobs everywhere. I still feel if he's as bad as stated, then someone would have already brought it forward. As for him closing her into a room..I'd have screamed and caused a scene...he'd think twice before cornering me again. I've witnessed two cases lately of women filing sexual harrassment cases. One case, the woman led the man to a point and then backed off...he didn't back off. The case was dismissed after witnesses were called in. Second case, a black male nurse jokingly told a clerk "once you go black, you can't go back". She went to administration, we were all called in to verify his comment, and the unit was scrutinized for sexual overtones. We all felt her problem wasn't so much the sexual tone, but her racist beliefs. We had, for months, listened to her talk about her "boob job" and "tummy tucks", etc. We felt what he said was no more sexual harrassing than us having to listen to her talk about her cosmetic surgeries. We were all mandated to attend a "civil treatment class" to teach us how to "act". What this did? It made everyone despise the clerk, and it made work alot less fun and very tense for a while. I don't agree that everyone should have to change because ONE person doesn't like what everyone else does. This clerk quit shortly after the incident. If I were somewhere and I felt I was the only one being offended, I'd do the same. So, I guess my opinion is greatly influenced by past experiences.
Aug 1, '01Doesn't this guy belong to a med group. Report him to the med group director. No group wants this liability. How about the HR dept? Do you have one?
Remember your skills are too marketable to put up with this crap. Get out of there! Especially if you have no were to turn for support such as a HR dept.
Aug 1, '01Like every issue there is two sides to the story. This is not to say one is right or the other is wrong. We are only hearing one side and it is difficult to advice actions when only one side is presented.
Like many I have worked at places where flirtation was commonplace. In comes a new nurse or doctor and the situation is changed. The environment becomes hostile and accusations and rumor begin and valid or not valid the work environment becomes tense.
I am not against going after those idividuals who are truely harrassing. Unfortunately that is often defined by an individual who feels harassed based on past experience and exposures and different individuals would not come to the same conclusion.
We have nurses who present with some rather flowery language and it is offensive to others and we have staff who are straight and would be on the edge of religion fanatics. I take offense at both when it crosses "my" lines.
Our working atmosphere should be monitored and management should be active in keeping it within bounds. Those who wish to impune their values on others and change behaviors of other individuals often find the road difficult because to gather the information one must be in the loop and to be in the loop probably means you are part of the problem.
If you do not like the people you work with find a new job. If who have been harrassed to the level of a criminal act, file a suit.
Aug 1, '01Emaas,
If you are comfortable sharing, I would like to know the outcome of your situation sometime. You got some good suggestions and I would like to know if any of them worked.
Aug 1, '01Hi. Ditto to the previous suggestions. Don't go back! It's not worth it. If you're in a room alone with him and you decide to strike back then it's his word against yours. Even if you're in a room with others don't strike out because it sounds like no one has the guts to do to this guy what really needs to be done. Stand up to your DON and medical director on this issue and refuse to take assignment with this doctor.
Aug 1, '01Hello my fellow wisconsiner-
I have to say that I am extremely proud of the way that you handled yourself from the beginning when you stated that no affair talk. And the way that you stood up to the doctor. I agree that you shouldn't be treated in such a manner. I think that you should request not to work with this doctor. If the doctor says anything else to you that is not appropriate, start writing down your conversation while talking to him. That should shut him up, and if that doesn't work, go over the DON's head. I am sure that someone owns the clinic? Hope everything works out.
May 11, '04Easy. The next time he see's you it is behind two burly police who want to question him about assault. He touches you he gets charged.
Although my preference is to ask to have a quick chat at the top of the stairs. Then give him a shove.
This is why nurses are easy targets. Stand up for yourself. Refuse to be a victim.
May 11, '04wonder what became of this situation. it was nearly 3 years ago.....hope the OP is doing ok
May 11, '04Yeah. I hope that it was resolved. I imagine not. That guy needs a big wake up call. His lack of respect for women is appalling. Wonder how he would react if his mother was treated that poorly.
May 11, '04Emaas
I hate you are having this problem but it is seen many times, why simply because alot of people seem to think doctors are like GOD and they see the harassment whether verbally or physically and turn the other way, this is not right by no means, so please start jotting down the remarks, dates, etc. and go through the proper channels, but why should we run all the time from situations when they arise? True, there are a selection of jobs nationwide due to the shortage and all, but what if this arise at the next job? and the next? You are a professional nurse and you do have a voice in this matter and we as female nurses once we place this thought deep in our brains then we as nurses can change these outcomes with doctors., we have alot of power in the health field, we out number men here whether we acknowledge it or not but we have to come together...ex: you see how those ladies told him what you told them, now they could have nip it in the bud if they had stated, "Doctor several nurse here are very offended by your behavior, and it will not be tolerated here, we are professionals, and if WE have to go higher to get something done about this harassment WE will," you wouldn't had another problem out of him, this is serious we as nurses must learn to stick together, we do have a voice and once we use it this nursing field will once again bloom!
Sorry so winded ladies/gents but I had to vent!!Last edit by 1BlessedRN on May 11, '04
May 12, '04Do you have an ethics committee? Talk to the administrator of the clinic. Someone hired him- someone can fire him.
His behavior is absolutely unacceptable-If all else fails, quit. There are plenty of nursing jobs out their where the physicians respect your priofessionalism.
May 12, '04Lisa, You did the right standing up to this doctor. Of course I have a few other chosen words for him. Flirting is one thing. But to explicitly tell you about his affair and to degrate you is another. I think several people have given you some wonderful advise. You've done the chain of command, going to administration. Unfortunately, they want to keep their ears closed, because there is something they could do about it. I do think you need to follow up with attorney regarding this. If you want to be really sneaky and diffently nail is but to a wall!--use a tape recorder. Get every nasty little comment on tape. The evidence would be there. And then my darling, there putty in your hands. I know that sounds very under handed, but you've done everything the right way, but yet no one wants to listen to you. Plus you never know if he's pushing is attority on another nurse that isn't as smart as you. The medical field is hard already, we as care givers take alot of crap, we don't need to take crap like this. Hang in there. Your a smart and intelligent individual!