I snapped - page 3

Well, I have just completed the most hellish evening of work I have ever done in my years of nursing. I went of the deep end, and I am feeling just totally disgusted with myself, I ... Read More

  1. by   Peeps Mcarthur

    I think there should be "celebrity nurse boxing". Whomever the nurses are in the deepest doo-doo could beat it out of eachother.

    The winner, of course, would get a title bout with the admin that ignored whatever problem preceded the first incident.

    Pay-per-view material.
  2. by   Sleepyeyes
    Originally posted by Peeps Mcarthur

    The winner, of course, would get a title bout with the admin that ignored whatever problem preceded the first incident.

    Pay-per-view material.

  3. by   canoehead
    Sundowner- I could have been in the same spot you were and done the same thing easily. Big Bertha needs to be ripped a new one, but in the hall in front of a patient is probably not the best choice of places. Maybe a knock out glare and a "FINE, You deal with him!" would have been your best choice. And walk away with him yelling while you go have a well deserved smoke break. Then you could go back, escort her to the treatment room and have it out, woman to woman.

    I'm sorry this happened to you, and from the sounds of it your supervisor agrees with the rest of us that everyone gets to have a horrible, rotten, PMSing day once in a while. Laugh it off- it was a stupid thing to do, but you won't do it again, and probably Bertha deserved it ten other times that you just put up with her.

    You can come work with me anytime...although I don't intend to be walking in front of any wheelchairs when you get a bee in your butt.
  4. by   Sundowner
    You guys are too funny.
    Though I know I could go for a "nurse death match" on occassion. I think they should instate Peeps's idea and make it some sort of state regulation or something.

    I spoke with my boss this morning who said (and I am not suprised) that the particular facility inwhich this occured does not desire my services any longer.....oh well eh.
    I have been officially kicked out whiich sort of bothers me because I have prided myself on my excellent work history and now have quite a blemish. I have also been put on probation (again not suprising) for two months (I thought that was rather lieniant).

    I also learned that bertha dear has exacerbated the story, and states that I left the facility without telling her or having permissioin which is not true. I should have beat the **** out of her. But no big whoop all is said and done, now my biggest fear is running into her at a different faciliity somewhere.....heee heee that should prove to be interesting.
  5. by   zudy
    Sundowner, hope you are doing OK today. I think all of us have worked with "Bertha" at one time or another. But, are you ready for this? The "Bertha" in my life was having an affair with one of our ER docs!!!!!!!!! So help me, I thought it would come to me " going nursing " some days!!! And LAZY!!!! This chick was to lazy to breath!!!! I thought I would have to intubate her and bag her some days !!!! I used to stop by her ( while I was running my a$$ off and she was sitting with her dr) and do a pulse check, then annouce to everyone Its OK !!! She DOES have a pulse!!!!!!!! didn't change anything, but it got a laugh. she finally got fired!! Hang in there sundowner, we all screw up. No one was hurt. I'm thinking of you!!!:kiss
  6. by   nursejws
    Bummer! Sundowner I was hoping for a different outcome somehow. Did anything happen to Bertha? Where's she at...I'll kick her azz!?!?! I need to make a trip to Pgh anyway, my sister owes me $700 and we really need the money right now.
  7. by   RNPD
    I am sorry you had such a bad time. We all snap-there have been countless times in my career when a combination of stress and too damn much work for one person to do safely has caused me to lose it and behave in a way that I was very ashamed of when it was over. Although I know I am being too hard on myself when I feel this way, just as you are being too hard on yourself now. It always seems worse to us that it probably does to the people who witness it. I think that had it not been bertha you might have behaved differently, but some people just push our buttons.

    I have a comment about removing an a&ox3 patient in a wheelchair. That is the one area where i disagree with what you did. If the man was ambulatory, you would not have bodily removed him from the scene just for ranting-if you tried to do so by laying hands on him, that could have caused you a lot of trouble. In this case the wheelchair is an extension of the man's body so to speak and I for one, would be quite unhappy if someone moved me against my will just because I was in a wc. I think you could have attempted to guide the man back to his room with requests, but he had a right to be in the hallway and a right to complain as well-no matter how inappropriate. I guess i am saying that I believe the man in a wc should not have been treated any differently than you would have treated him if he was not in a wc.
  8. by   I1tobern
    Hey sundowner,
    At least it did not end up in a fight. I did do that on the side of the road one night at work. Not my brightest hour. But, that is a whole other story.

    We all have people who just rub us the wrong way. There doesn't really have to be a reason. It doesn't me that we are bad or that they are bad (but sometimes they are bad).

    Best thing for you is to look at this as a learning situtation. I hate it that you were reprimanded and all, but just let it go and get on with it. If you do run up on ole bertha again, you'll be more than ready to deal with her.
  9. by   l.rae
    hey Sundowner...glad you are feeling better!! Live and learn..right.? Well, after 22 years in this career..many twists and turns......even in life in general....l've learned all things happen for a reason ...if your attitude about it is right..(it is, you accept accountability andfeel remorse).....things usually workout better for you in the long run....one thing already...no more bertha!....Thank you for sharing this with all of us...it has caused me to reflect on things that has happened to me...not feel so badly about it......thank goodness someone else out there isn't perfect either!!! l thought l was the only one..(we all feel that way sometimes......Hugs!.......LR
  10. by   Sundowner
    I am in agreement with you, the fact that the man was in a wheel chair allowed me to take advantage of him. Had he been ambulatory, this would not have happend. I would not have been able to remove him.

    Technically I think Bertha was right in her thoughts that the man should have been left alone, however, she shouldn't have attempted to prevent me from removing him, be it wrong or be it not. The situation was just not handled right from the get go and obviously got out of hand.

    Some of my biggest issuses as of late have revolved around what we as nurses have to take as far as abuse. I have no problems with the confused smacking me or being nasty, it is out of their controll, but families and oriented patients have become increasingly more abusive towards us and it is getting out of hand. I understand their anguish, but most of them could give a rats azz less about ours. It seems as though the world is aware of the nursing shortage, and it somehow in every aspect is taken out on us. This is where the danger lies, this is where the problem is. Those patients and their families know what we are under and they choose to not care and expect us to do for them what we could normally do for them if we were staffed right.

    What I just ADORE is the patient who is now in long term care, and has two daughters that are nurses and they sit with him all day and all night long........but wont lift a fricking finger. They call you off the floor for every little tiny need. They know you have a time window with meds but insist that mother dear gets her pills at exactly five, Unless its a pain med then you should be able to sneak it in in that hour window you have. They cant seem to rub the lotion on moms feet or back....not a script...just their favorite lilac scented moisterizer that mom loves and makes the room smell nice....they need the cna to do it...or worse they dont like the cna and feel it should be a licensed person to put the cream on. WHAT THE FU8K! How many times have you heard a family member or patient call the staff names? Stupid is the word I have been hearing alot latley.....or my favorite....."where did you get your license?" I actually had a nut case ask me that question when I told her I didnt have an extra tv remote for her dear hubbys tv. (he was in a vegitative state and couldnt use it anyway). The lack of respect and understand towards us is obscene.
  11. by   micro
    hey, Mario......
    a bobo blow up doll.......cool....
    hey, anybody remember the "damn it" dolls made for cancer patients......are they still out there......
    how bout a damn it doll for nurses.............
    that way we could leave each other alone, just have to have a supply of damn it dolls........
    horizontal violence, bullying in the workplace, downward violence, upward violence

    what about peace and teamwork.....

    micro is very micro
    Last edit by micro on Jun 19, '02
  12. by   mattsmom81
    The situation described is lateral violence at its worst IMO.

    I do hope you will seek some anger management assistance or some counseling, as I read your post I seem to get the opinion you are looking to 'blame' this situation on everything and everybody but yourself. You could have walked away from this, but you chose not to.

    We are expected to be able to control our tempers. We're professionals. I am truly surprised at the responses I am reading on this thread. This will be the first time i truly disagree with a train of thought expressed on this forum. I'm glad I haven't worked with many people who behave like this,...I only recall once, and I immediately resigned and reported the lunatic nurse to the BON, as she was out of control.

    Get some help, Sundowner. Don't believe the people here who have said "it's OK". It's not, and please...posters who inferred it IS OK, get a grip. I repeat, you COULD have walked away from this situation very easily and chose not to.

    Now...I'm a hospital critical care nurse. If what I read above goes on normally at LTC centers, all I can say is no wonder they can't get decent help.
  13. by   colleen10
    Hi Sundowner,

    I just wanted to say that I am glad you are going to your doctor about this and hope that they are able to provide you some answers and help.

    Everyone "freaks" out sometime and even though your actions were not the right way to handle the situation you should be commended for admitting that something is wrong here and wanting to get to the bottom of it.

    I also wanted to say that even though Bertha is "annoying" and she did enter into a confrontation she probably felt that her actions were justified. I mean, if you can imagine that she enters the scene in the middle of your story and think about her perception of what was going on you might better understand where she was coming from.

    From her Point of View she probably saw an over worked / irritable nurse in a confrontation with a patient, who was pushing the irrate resident back to his room against his wishes. She probably felt that she had to act as a patient advocate by keeping you from moving him.

    That's no excuse for her grabbing you but she may have been quite angered and upset by the "scene that she saw".

    There are a hundred different ways this incident could have ended "if only, I had done this - and she had done that" but unfortunately it escalated and this is the way it played out.

    From the general tone of your messages I get a feeling that maybe you weren't quite happy there nor with the work that you were doing. Maybe it is a good thing that you will not be returning there.

    A good saying is "You did what you knew, and when you knew better, you did better."

    Good Luck to you,