I had a strange sense of anticipation as I walked in. Working as a perdiem Nursing supervisor(Assistant Director of Nursing) in a busy hospital, I had strongly felt that I needed to put myself down as available for this Sunday shift a month ago. I avoided working Sundays as they were packed between church,religious education,dance class for my daughter and home cooking. Now I was here.
As I walked into the lobby, two relieved security officers came hurriedly towards me.
"Thank God you are here! We need your help!"
What's the matter Officer Davis? How can I help you?", I calmly asked as I watched the ED social worker turn the corner and come towards me. They all began speaking and I held up my hand and smiled.
"One person please!"
The social worker told me the situation. There was a family in the emergency room. They were very upset. Their brother was missing for five days and they finally found out that he had been brought to this hospital. The doctor told them in the ED that their brother had a major heart attack and had been brought in dead. The family went shocked, angry and upset. There were two siblings in the ER, a brother Tom who was mentally challenged and had lived with the patient and a sister Sara who took care of five brothers, four with special needs (two lived in Ohio) and the patient Ron, who had been brought in dead. She wanted proof that this was her brother. She wanted to see Ronny's body and his belongings.
Our hospital allows patient bodies to be seen in the morgue only under special circumstances. I showed the social worker how to locate his belongings on our EMR and asked him to see if that would suffice. I told him to reach out to me after report.
I got report from the night ADNs who told me flat out that they were not going to the morgue - period! I wasn't hot about it either as the patient had been in the morgue for five days. I prayed that the belonging was enough proof. After report, I was relieved that I was not covering the ED. The other supervisor was!
The social worker reached out to her and was told to tell the family that they could not see the body. The social worker, not knowing what else to do, then reached out to me as the brother Tom was yelling, screaming and having a meltdown in the ED and had been escorted out by security but the family was refusing to leave. I discussed this with the other ADN and offered to go speak to the family. She consented and I went down to the ED.
I approached the sister Sara who was methodically taking out everything from the patient's bag ( which the social worker had found) and looking at them. I offered my condolences and asked her what I could do to help her. She told me that she wanted to see his body and that her other sibling Marcus was on the way.
Tom was sitting outside the main entrance and was not allowed back in for the time being. Security told me that they were waiting on cops.I told them that I would talk to Tom. I slowly went towards him and stood a little away.
"Hello Tom. I am Annie, the nursing supervisor."
No response.
" May I talk to you?"
No response.
"I am so sorry that you are sad. I wish I could help you".
He suddenly turned, his eyes bloodshot. My heart was in my throat as I did not know what he was going to do!
He burst out, "It's not true! He's not dead! "Sobs racked his body. I inched closer.
"May I sit down?"
He nodded. He thrust his phone towards me, speaking with a lisp, "Look! I called him so many times. He did not answer! He did not answer!"
Tears pricked my eyes. I was looking at a 56 year old who drove a car but had the mental capacity of a five year old.
"I am so sorry! He could not answer you as he died" I said softly. I inched closer to him and now was sitting next to him. He put his head on my shoulders and cried.
After a while he sat up, looked at me and said, "It's ok. It's not your fault".
I saw the cops pull up and I signed that it was ok. They kept a watchful distance. Now that I had got him to calm down I asked him if he would like something to eat or drink. He asked for water and so I went the ADN office and got him Graham Crackers and water. He thanked me! I then told him to call for me if he needed me and went back into the lobby. Sara who was sitting in the main lobby told me that she was waiting on Marcus who had psych issues! I spoke to security and asked them to inform me when he arrived and went on rounds. I got paged two hours later that Marcus was there and was having a huge argument in the lobby.
I went down and spoke to them. Tom had left as he wanted to grieve by himself. Marcus was in my face and Sara was trying to calm him down.
He kept saying, "I gotta see if he is dead!"
I spoke to security in private and we decided to show them the body. I went ahead with security, put on gloves and mask and prepped the body for viewing o a stretcher. We put a screen around the body.We then went back and told them to follow us. I held my breath as they peeked around the screen.Sara took one quick look and said, 'That's Ron!" and walked out. Marcus stood and stared at his brother and said, "He's gone! My brother is gone" and started weeping hard. Security gently escorted him while the other security and I put the body back in the morgue.
We then escorted them to the lobby where they sat and did not want to leave as Ron was there! Sara showed me a phone video she had taken the week before he died. Ron playing with his dog in the park. Ron looked healthy and happy.
I gently suggested that they go home and finally they left. I thanked the team for working together professionally and helping a family with special needs in grief. The cops had long gone. I went home after my shift and listened to my kids arguing and kidding with each other as my husband and I enjoyed our coffee. I felt blessed to be alive and surrounded by life though my heart ached for Sara, Tom and Marcus.
Special need patients and family need extra careful handling and caring in times of grief. The situation could have escalated if not for the team working together as one. We could not save Ron but we stood together to help his family.
