How would this make you feel?

[kmchugh]

Not long ago, the wife of one of my co-workers (I'll call him Joe) had a baby. When her labor pains started, he was immediately put on vacation, and returned when things had settled down at home. During his absence, he missed several days of call which he was scheduled for, which we covered by being bumped up one position in the call schedule. Since his return, he has not swapped call with anyone to "pay back" covering for him in his absence. (Not sour grapes on my part, I have no problem with what occurred so far.)

My wife is due in March. At the request of my boss, I put in for vacation for a couple of weeks in the general time frame that the baby is due. He asked me to do so "so no one else would schedule vacation at the same time." Joe (who also runs the call schedule) was not asked to do the same thing. Yesterday, Joe came to me in the middle of a case and said "Kevin, we have a problem with your vacation request. It seems you are supposed to be on call during the weekend of your vacation. So, to make it fair, I'll trade weekends with you, so you can be on call the weekend before your baby is due, and I'll cover your weekend. (I'm getting steamed as I write this.) I didn't want to make a scene in front of the OR staff or surgeon, so I simply agreed.

Am I getting angry over nothing? As some of you know, I'm not real happy with my current job situation, and I'm wondering if I am letting my overall dislike for the situation cloud my judgement. Or, would you feel, as I do, that someone is playing favorites?

Opinions please?

Kevin

[hoolahan, ASN, RN]

Ditto what Rusty said.

One question though, did any of your other co-workers who do not have or don't expect to have children have to cover for either of you guys? How do you re-pay them?? Or is the beef just w Joe??

He should kiss the ground you all walked on for covering for him w/o hesitation. Where I have worked, you would have to trade that first born child to get such a favor.

[louloubell1]

I can understand where you're perturbed, but what about FMLA? Men are eligible for FMLA leave when they have a new baby, & you can't be told, to my knowledge, that you have to make up any call shifts, etc. Even though FMLA is unpaid leave, you can use vacation pay (if you have it coming) during that time.

Lou

Convicted of placenta previa & serving time on couch arrest ~day9

[Glad2behere]

Darn Kevin,

Not sure there is enough info here. If this guy Joe does the oncall scheduling, sounds as if he has a little more formal authority within the group? Am I making assumptions or can he actually be that rash? If you're low man, you may have to take it,

for a while.

How would I feel? Totally used. Like a peon.

Why don't you just ask to meet with him again, or better yet, when he is doing a case, walk in and whisper in his ear that there is a "problem" with the oncall and vacation schedule and that he "missed" a few important details that you feel surely he wasn't aware of, and give him the chance to look you up later in the day. Intimidation is half of it, good communication is the other half, try to use both. That is exactly what he is doing to you.

And Kevin, keep your lid on.

[SmilingBluEyes]

What Russell said. You are entitled and you know it. You handled it well, keeping your cool. Now, time to be straight-up w/the guy and get what is yours. :)

[P_RN, ADN, RN]

Exactly what Russ said. I'd add a witness if Joe gets contrary, possibly one of the make-up call people. I imagine Joe got some heat from his bosses...probably not deserved and he's playing "kick the dog."

FMLA is another co-path. Dads as well as Mommies get it if all the rules are met.......time in employment.....over 50 employees etc.

http://www.dol.gov/esa/whd/fmla/

[mario_ragucci]

Kevin, It's hard to encounter this sort of strife because we all expect to be given a fair shake every time. Often, peope take separation of personal/profesional life the wrong way and figure they reserve their "fair shakes" for personal things, and allow their professional ethics to decend to "dog eat dog." This could be where training comes in. People's behaviors require discipline on your part, just like succeeding on a battle field requires discipline. Not saying these people you are dealing with are enemy; Don't give up your position just because this is happening to you. How many times have you stood in a formation while people who you doubted were promoted to higher rank($)? Just stay in formation and wait until the next one comes in and it could be yours! My best to you on becoming a new dad. Think about that as a source of positive energy transcending this seeming unfair treatment. Go easy bro!

[Youda]

What Rusty said.

Kevin, I'm surprised that you allowed this self-absorbed, unfair person do this to you! You are usually far more assertive, and certainly articulate enough to handle this well! You already know what to do, now just go do it! :)

[kmchugh]

Knowing that I have already committed myself to finding a new job and leaving when my current contract was up, I had decided to just keep my mouth shut and deal with it. Then, I got a look at the revised call schedule, which puts me on call for two weekends in a row. If this schedule does not change, there is the probability that I will have to work 16 days in a row (maybe as many as 20), without a break, before our baby is born. Nope, no way. First, I'll talk to "Joe." If that goes nowhere, I'm taking it to the senior anesthesiologist in the group. Don't care what others think, say or do.

Kevin

[hoolahan, ASN, RN]

Kevin, the FMLA thing sounds like the way to go. Maybe that was what Joe did? And why he was immediately put on vaca and didn't have to make up call?

[RNFROG3, BSN, RN]

Stand tall and go for it -- at this point the only thing you are losing is patience. My be you'll be albe to convince the higher ups that you deserve the same tx as Joe and 16 days on no break isn't safe!

[cmggriff]

Kevin, I guess I am more the confrontational kind. I would try to get this jerk alone and offer the choice of doing the right thing or whipping my butt. Like all free advice this worth every penny you paid. So do what you think is best for you and yours. Good luck, Gary

[prmenrs, RN]

I like what Russell said, too. My only point is that that baby may not know or care what weekends you're on call or scheduled or whatever---just your luck he/she decides a totally different weekend to debut.

Be sure to post pix!