I really don't know what to say,but that I have lost my ability to work as the nurse I once was. I find my self with little to no com,passion or empathy. i have always given 110% to nursing and my job and now can't. I am at a new job for 2 months, had very little orientation- 2 days i thnik and when i ask for more it goes over their heads. I feel like i am just doing tasks and swimming to keep from drowning. The job i left 4 months ago, made me worrry about losing my liscene. I had never felt that way befroe. I worked at the job for 10 months and 16 people on a 25 bed unit either transferred out, quit or were fired. the worst part about feeling this way is that my husband understands, but the rest of my family thinks i'm lazy and don't want to work. Friends make the comments " it must be great to only work 3 days per week: not understanding that 12 hrs tunrs into 13 plus and then the drive time. after 2- 12 hrs shifts i am shot for the next day. i am getting help by seeing a counselor and hope that this helps. the worst part is that I know that I care and can't just walk by a wet bed, a patinet screaming etc. others do. their never seems to be some one around when the 250 lb pt needs into bed now if not sooner and won't stop screaming at you until you do it. I know that I am blabbing on, but one more frustration is, it takes my 2 1/2 hrs to pass meds to 6-7 people. too many interuptions for silly things. hope i can hang in their, but feel the flames at my feet.
