Afraid to quit my job

[nsue]

I have been working as an RCM in long term care for 5 months. I have been provided education on how to do MDS and state regs. I know this cost the company money to train me. I have done a good job, but was not trained on all aspects of the position and have had to figure out most of it myself. I told my employer I would stay a year, but am not able to. I work long hours uncompensated and people keep asking me "why haven't you done (fill in the blank)". I have never been told I was responsible for those duties nor shown how to do it. My husband is fed up with me coming home late and falling asleep before 8pm. The unit I work on has had 4 managers over the last couple of years and I was trained by an MDS consultant who did not know all the aspects of the position. Hence I started out behind and would have to work 12 hour days every day in order to catch up. I have improved the quality of care and get along great with my coworkers so I feel like I am letting them down.

My problem is I feel bad for putting them in a bind. I only plan to give 2 weeks notice although the company request a month. It is an "at will employer" meaning I don't even have to give notice if I don't want to. They will probably offer me more money because they are desperate but it is not the money.

Any suggestions on how to handle my resignation?

[JJ the crit RN]

I'm afraid I don't agree with those who want you to give a month notice. This employer's problems are not your problems. If they burn through managers like you've said then they got issues. You're in this life for you, they're a means to survive. I also don't agree that healthcare is a small neighborhood, do you live in the middle of nowhere? I left one hospital with no notice, none, just called staffing and told them I wouldn't be back. A year later they rehired me, and I thought oh yeah, this is why I left. So I left again and worked a year apiece at various hospitals before settling for one. Do what you have to do, it's not working out for you, you're tired all the time, you're working for nothing at times, are you kidding me? Quit and be gone. You owe them nothing. You're burning that bridge because it's just led to misery.

[nsue]

That's where I am at. I am mentally and physically exhausted. I am tired of people saying "why didn't you do this" and never having been told that I was supposed to do it. I am very conscientious and it stresses me out to always feel behind. Like I said I wouldn't mind working extra but there is no compensation for it. I asked for a day off and the boss says "make sure_____this is done". Well she didn't just get done working 50 hours in a week. I live in a metropolitan area where there are plenty of opportunities for jobs, I just hate letting people down. My staff and residents love me and I feel I owe them something for the classes they sent me to. Thank you for your opinion.

[JKL33]

My staff and residents love me and I feel I owe them something for the classes they sent me to. Thank you for your opinion.

Your ethic here is admirable, but at the same time others need to take responsibility for their end of things. Employers' hands are not tied behind their backs with regard to how they treat people. They DO have choices. If your goodwill and work ethic isn't of any value to them except for how they can milk it, then that is a choice THEY have made. It's okay for them to have to live with it.

It seems like you should consider giving the requested notice, though. It'll probably be easier to make it through the month knowing that this particular problem will soon be off your back. Leave on as positive terms as you can.

[bgxyrnf, MSN, RN]

I'm afraid I don't agree with those who want you to give a month notice. This employer's problems are not your problems. If they burn through managers like you've said then they got issues. You're in this life for you...

Which is precisely why I would try as hard as possible to give the full notice that they request, or at the very least, agree to work per diem over a few weeks to help their transition.

Burning bridges has a way of coming back on you at the most inopportune times, sometimes years later.

I work in NorCal, a huge area with multiple thousands of nurses. I continue to be amazed at how often I run across people from whom I have only one degree of separation. When I applied for a new job a couple years ago, it turns out that one of their key employees used to work at the same place that I was leaving. While she and I never worked together, the hiring manager asked her to talk to her old colleagues about me off-the-record. It turns out that she was even personal friends with my old manager. Later, when applying for another job, that same nurse - now a colleague - was pivotal in supporting my application because she had worked with the hiring manager years ago as bedside nurses.

A few more weeks of misery might pay HUGE dividends down the road when a former colleague tells a prospective future colleague about how great you were when you left and how hard you worked to ease the transition.

[nsue]

My only problem with giving a month is they won't find anyone and will the new place wait? There was no rcm when i got there. They had hired a agency person for 3 months. I will be super uncomfortable looking at them every day in stand ups. If the job isn't for me then I should move on. My regret is that I have made a difference in the care there and staff,residents and families like me.

[nsue]

I am almist 60 and plan to work 5 years more then move to the coast. It would be unlikely to run into people from where I live down there. I am not worried about my reputation as I have excellent skills and get along with nearly everyone.

[ruby_jane, BSN, RN]

I should tell them the truth as to why I am leaving so they actually train the nurse who takes over or they will never keep someone.

It sounds like the company will not care why you're leaving, so as satisfying as it might seem, I'd just say you're leaving to a job with more money. Also, don't feel guilty about the five months. If you only have five years left (and I envy that!) be at peace and move on.

[CCStacey]

If possible it's always good to meet the request of an employer for notice in a situation like this. It sounds like you will not be easily replaced, I would speak with the employer and try and work out a compromise on the time - the time it takes to train a replacement might be closer to 2 weeks if a plan is in place.

It's a lot harder to re-build burnt bridges than new ones, and you never know when you'll have to deal with someone that's involved in this situation in another company in the future. You also may find yourself explaining why you only gave 2 weeks notice when the employer wanted more to another employer that takes it particularly seriously. Just a lot of opportunity to cause future problems when a more compromising position could avoid it altogether.

[Here.I.Stand, BSN, RN]

First, you have no reason to feel guilty for them. Their policies and culture have proven intolerable -- THEY chose not to make changes. They are exhibiting insanity: treating good nurses like mules and expecting one to stay and put up with it.

However, I would be careful with getting yourself non-rehirable. You may not want to work for them, but when the next place checks your work history? I would hate for them to pass on you for a job because your last employer wouldn't take you back.

[nsue]

Well it will probably take them months to find a replacement. And as leaving at 5 not gonna happen when they constantly throw admits at you at 2pm with no warning. I agree if circumstances were different but they don't care, so why should I. Thanks for the input

[Accolay]

I really agree with the "Come to Jesus" moment comments on here. You may need a job, but you don't need this job. If you don't find another job, as others have suggested, I think you need to sit down with your managers and have that conversation about 1. What are your job expectations in writing and 2. boundaries on your hours. These are non-negotiable. If it doesn't happen, then you're going to leave. Extra pay wont cut it. Hiring more staff and effective management will.

[kbrn2002, ADN, RN]

If you ace the interview for the new job I doubt they will want to wait out a 1 month notice so give the standard 2 weeks and don't feel bad about that. It sounds like it wouldn't matter if you gave them no notice or 3 months notice they probably wouldn't have a replacement plan in place anyway. Their failure to hire a replacement in time for you to help train somebody is not your fault, no need to feel guilty on your part. But out of common professional courtesy do give that 2 weeks notice and stick to it.