Friends cheating.. what to do?

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I have quite the dilemma here. We have a med-surg final coming up in a few weeks, and many of the questions will be from previous exams. I don't know about your schools, but my nursing school does alot to ensure that no one has written record of test questions (for example, during a test review we aren't allowed to take any notes, we never get tests back, etc). One girl has somehow obtained copies of all the previous exams and is talking about distributing them to our classmates. The problem is, everyone involved are very close friends of mine who have always had great character and integrity and I am completely shocked they are doing this. There are tons of people who need to ace the final in order to even pass the class, but not these people. It is so unfair to those whose grades are hanging in the balance and it is just plain wrong. I'm afraid that if I tell the prof they will get in big trouble, and I'm the only person who knows about this who isn't participating, so I will lose many close friends. Any advice?

Specializes in ICU / PCU / Telemetry / Oncology.

I personally have a zero tolerance for cheating. If you do it in a nursing program, not only do you deserve to be kicked out, you should never be allowed to ever attend another nursing program or ever be eligible to take the NCLEX. A friend who ever puts you in a situation involving cheating is not a friend to begin with.

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I see where you are coming from. IMHO, some of the people who are telling the OP to simply not care about what happens to her friends are not being realistic. Most people I know care about what happens to their friends. They do not want to see thier friends get expelled from school and be out thousands of dollars and a couple of years.

I like the idea of doing an anonymous email as long as you DO NOT mention any names or any specifics. This way the teacher can change the test if she wants to, your friends will not get in trouble, and you conscious can be clear. That is about all you can do.

Anyway good luck and do whatever feels right to you.

Evidently, it's the friend who is cheating who doesn't care about being expelled from school and being out thousands of dollars as that's the consequence of their actions.

I would likely speak with them before reporting them, but my conversation would be along the lines of, "Have you lost your ever-loving mind? What the heck were you thinking?"

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I don't understand this perception: If I report someone else's cheating and they get kicked out....they're getting kicked out because they chose to cheat, not because I reported them.

That's like saying a bank robber went to jail because of an eyewitness's testimony....no, the bank robber goes to jail because they robbed a bank.

Just to be clear, in my post I did not say that it would be her fault if they got kicked out. I said that she would be there to see it and it would not feel good to see that happen to her friends. Eyewitness testimony is usually not given by the robbers friend but that's off topic. IMHO, those (not saying you) who are just dismissing her friendships like they mean nothing are not being practical. We can agree to disagree on that.

I think she should just send a vague anonymous email. That's my opinion. But like I said in my other post, she should do whatever she feels is right and not feel guilty about it. The guilty ones are the ones who are cheating. OP let us know how this turns out.

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Just to be clear, in my post I did not say that it would be her fault if they got kicked out. I said that she would be there to see it and it would not feel good to see that happen to her friends. Eyewitness testimony is usually not given by the robbers friend but that's off topic. IMHO, those who are just dismissing her friendships like they mean nothing are not being practical. We can agree to disagree on that.

I think she should just send a vague anonymous email. That's my opinion. But like I said in my other post, she should do whatever she feels is right and not feel guilty about it. The guilty ones are the ones who are cheating. OP let us know how this turns out.

I of course don't want to see my friends get kicked out of a program, but if I was in this situation...

A) how much were they thinking about my friendship when they told me what they were up to? They're putting me in a position where I can become an accomplice, or report them....they give me no choice, I will not be an accomplice.

B) Even if I still considered these people friends (I have difficulty calling people friends if I can't trust them)...protecting them from the consequences of their own actions isn't being a friend, it's being an enabler.

And yes, if my "friends" robbed a bank in front of me, I would testify against them. Again, the law would consider me a witness or an accomplice. I choose witness.

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Specializes in Critical Care, Emergency Medicine, Flight.

i didnt read the whole thread but id rat them out. everyone is there working to hard HONESTLY to have someone cheating you know. big deal if they pass a stupid test, they wont know stuff when it really matters and come to the patients.. and thats kinda scary.

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I of course don't want to see my friends get kicked out of a program, but if I was in this situation...

A) how much were they thinking about my friendship when they told me what they were up to? They're putting me in a position where I can become an accomplice, or report them....they give me no choice, I will not be an accomplice.

B) Even if I still considered these people friends (I have difficulty calling people friends if I can't trust them)...protecting them from the consequences of their own actions isn't being a friend, it's being an enabler.

And yes, if my "friends" robbed a bank in front of me, I would testify against them. Again, the law would consider me a witness or an accomplice. I choose witness.

Well I understand your point even though I completely disagree with it, lol. In your post you say "if you were in this situation" which leads me to believe this had never happened to you. I think it is easy to be so definitive about things when they have never happened to you. I know people who this has happened to and they did not out right tell on their friends. Actually many posters in this very thread have told OP to tell in a way thay does not get her friends in trouble. Is it because we are all evil cheaters? No, it is because we know it is not that easy. That's all I'm saying.

IMHO, telling the poster to go confront her friends to tell them that she is going to report them and then actually reporting them is not a good idea. The professor might ask for names and they would know it was her. However, I do see your point. The OP has alot to think about and I wish her luck.

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Well I understand your point even though I completely disagree with it, lol. In your post you say "if you were in this situation" which leads me to believe this had never happened to you. I think it is easy to be so definitive about things when they have never happened to you. I know people who this has happened to and they did not out right tell on their friends. Actually many posters in this very thread have told OP to tell in a way thay does not get her friends in trouble. Is it because we are all evil cheaters? No, it is because we know it is not that easy. That's all I'm saying.

IMHO, telling the poster to go confront her friends to tell them that she is going to report them and then actually reporting them is not a good idea. The professor might ask for names and they would know it was her. However, I do see your point. The OP has alot to think about and I wish her luck.

Glad you see my point. One point of clarification....this exact situation hasn't happened to me of course, but I was involved in a similar situation and I reported. I wouldn't recommend anything I wouldn't do myself.

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Glad you see my point. One point of clarification....this exact situation hasn't happened to me of course, but I was involved in a similar situation and I reported. I wouldn't recommend anything I wouldn't do myself.

Cool! I did not want to seem like I was being argumentative. The OP has many good recommendations to consider and maybe she will get a few more. Hope she lets us know the outcome.

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Specializes in ICU / PCU / Telemetry / Oncology.
Glad you see my point. One point of clarification....this exact situation hasn't happened to me of course, but I was involved in a similar situation and I reported. I wouldn't recommend anything I wouldn't do myself.

Cool! I did not want to seem like I was being argumentative. The OP has many good recommendations to consider and maybe she will get a few more. Hope she lets us know the outcome.

:hug: I freaking :redbeathe happy endings. Rodney King would be proud :D

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lol and how close are these friends that they didn't include you in the cheating? If they were really your friends, they woulda included you :coollook:

You won't get them in trouble because the teacher doesn't care about names, the teacher will just change the test up

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I have been tossin and turning and praying about this and have been trying to see what is the best thing to do as a follower of Christ, as a future nurse, and as a friend. I talked to the person with the test info, told them the seriousness of the situation before the info could be passed around and blow up into a bigger problem (they did not even realize how serious this is... I know that's hard to believe but this person is very naive), and they will come clean without me even having to give the "Turn yourself in or I'll do it for you" ultimatum because they know that it is the right thing to do. Let me repeat that, this person is turning themself in regardless of the consequences because they recognize have made an error in judgement and compromised their character/integrity and want to do what is right. I hope that God honors their integrity as he has honored mine in what has been a pretty difficult situation but could have been way worse. I did talk to the prof but did not have to give names b/c the person confessed on their own.

Watch who you associate with. Show me your friends and I'll show you your future.

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That was a great way to handle the situation

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