? For those who do C-Sections often

Specialties Ob/Gyn

Published

Ok, I am due in May (yay, it's a girl!!!!!!!) with my first baby, who by the way has the most beutiful U/S photos you have ever seen! Anyway, my husband is super squemish (very much on the wimpy side) to the point of utter ridiculousness. The whole idea of pregnancy and childbirth grosses him out so much he refuses to even speak of it. Ticks me off, but that's another story. When the subject of C-sections came up he just lost it, I thought he was going to :barf01: just hearing the word. He says if I have to have one, he does not want to be in the room at all because he will faint.

My question is: how many guys, who think they are going to faint, actually do? I mean, do some guys get in there thinking it is going to be horrible and then are so overwhelmed by the birth of their child that it is not as bad as they imagined? I am pretty upset about his comment and my first instinct was to tell him to suck it up and be a man, but then I felt selfish and then I felt that I had a right to be selfish as the worst of it would be happening to me and not him. Oh, those wonderful hormones!! Ha ha. :rotfl:

Should I let him off the hook or have him come in and hope for the best? (if I have to have one)

I personally have not seen anyone faint. We always have the family member sit at the head of the OR table where they can't see anything, except the baby on the warmer. If the family member really feels like they can't handle it, we ask that they not come into the OR. More often than not, they suck it up, because they really want to be there for the birth. Usually they are so pre-occupied with the excitement of seeing the baby, they forget that its a medical procedure.

I have never seen a dad/ or other family member faint if he/she stayed sitting next to the anesthesiologist behind the blue curtain.
Oh it doesn't happen too often, but trust me, it DOES happen.
Specializes in NICU, L&D, OB, Home Health, Management.

After 25+ years, yes, I've seen dads faint, but very few and most of those were due to hypoglycemia not 'gross stuff'. It is very important to make sure someone feeds dad, especially if the section is after a long labor (even a glass of OJ will get him thru the surgery).

I agree with the posters that have said 'tell him to suck it up'. This is one time he can be there for you and believe me you'll always remember it. I have a joke on my wall that says:

Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the room with my wife during labor and delivery?

A: Does the word alimony mean anything to you?:lol2:

Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.
Oh it doesn't happen too often, but trust me, it DOES happen.
Well I imagine it does. The only dad I saw faint was one who was present for the epidural placement. Fortunately, I had a chair right behind him and told him to sit as he went down. I warn them it may happen and we can't necessarily catch them.

Like I said, if they limit what they view, and are well-fed and hydrated, as someone else pointed out, they do fine, in my experience.

Well I imagine it does. The only dad I saw faint was one who was present for the epidural placement. Fortunately, I had a chair right behind him and told him to sit as he went down. I warn them it may happen and we can't necessarily catch them.

Like I said, if they limit what they view, and are well-fed and hydrated, as someone else pointed out, they do fine, in my experience.

We now insist that all dads sit down during epidural placement, after that well-publicized incident of the dad who died from his head injury when he passed out and hit the floor. We also insist that everyone else, everyone, wait outside while we're doing the epidural.

Most dads do great, and most of the ones that think they'll have a problem don't end up having one. And although everyone else in the room thinks anesthesia deals with dad, we do NOT. We're taking care of mom. The OB is supposed to have a chat with dad beforehand.

On our rare general C-Sections, dads are not allowed in the OR except to see the baby in the warmer with the neonatal team, and they go right back out with the baby when they leave the OR.

Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.

We have the dad in the room for csection once mom is comfy, we guide him back to a chair next to the MDA. It's worked well for years. No problems there. They generally focus on mom's face and baby. Once baby is out and initially stablized and dry, we take dad and baby back to mom's room. No problems doing it this way.

Specializes in L&D, Family Practice, HHA, IM.

FWIW, I've had a couple of dads come VERY close to passing out during a SVD but not during a CS. Then again, one of them was in the OR during a stat CS and was yakking away on his mobile phone ("the baby's about to come out") and the OB/GYN looked up at him and snapped, "Turn off that f***ing cell phone!" He did.

Over the years we have had many squeamish husbands, significant others AND patients. The saddest thing are the patients with no one there. If your husband is there and just doesn't think he could make it into the operating room, perhaps you should try to respect that because if he did faint or throw up (and yes, that does happen), everyone in the OR will have to focus on him instead of mainly on you and your baby. I hope he can overcome some of his reservations but I imagine he is scared. Aren't you? It isn't as unusual as you think. I hope it works out for you but in my opinion, the fact that he is there for you (I hope he will be any way) is a good thing to try and focus on. Many men (not just men but) want to or have a need to fix things. They can't fix your discomfort so sometimes they would rather just not deal with it. Try to both take it one day at a time and go with whatever happens. You can't change him and he can't change you.....Recently we had someone pass out because the patient insisted he stay and that involved a trip to the emergency room for him and much more anxiety for both of him. Maybe your husband will surprise you or perhaps you can compromise somehow....

OK I'm going to the be the "other side of the coin". My husband told me in the beginning of our pregnancy that he did NOT want to be present for the birh. He said he was sqeemish with blood and it hurt him to see anyone he loves in pain. I on the other hand "needed him to participate fully in the birth of our child". This became a battle in our marriage. When the time came to deliver, all of my anticipation of natural delivery by a midwife with my husbands help......turned into an emergency C/S under general anesthesia. Our daughter turned out fine......but emotionally I was devastated. My husband was happy that everything turned out fine. Some women (like myself) need to be able to share their birth experience with a loved one.

since my husband had no interest or intent on participating and I made the mistake of trying to force him......I am the one who ended up getting the short end of the stick. My time could have better been spent on having a close friend or relative who WAS interested in participating with me in the birth experience.

A few years later my sister-in-law became pregnant. Her husband (my husbands brother) also told her he did not want to participate in the birth experience. So my sister-in-law had her best friend go to lamaz classes, pre-natal classes and be her coach. On the day of her delivery, my brother-in-law waited in the waiting room the entire time. He went into the room after the baby was born and everything was cleaned up.

This worked out quite well for them. My sister-in-law has someone she can reminice with about the birth...her friend.

Sorry this is so long. But for the sake of your marriage/relationship-please find a compromise that will work for both of you.

I think I will not dwell on it too much and then when that day arrives see how it goes. If I had to have a c-section, then I will just make sure he is fed and ask him and not push it too much if he is hesitant. I am hoping the excitement will overwhelm him enough to forget about the rest!

Plus, my husband is one of the unfortunate fools who thinks lady partsl birth is not gross or disgusting!!:uhoh3: He has no problems being there if it is a vagnial birth and I don't have the heart to tell him the facts right now.

+ Add a Comment