I am not exactly in my first year after licensure, but second. A little background. I worked part time (per diem) for a year and then had to move out of state. After several months of searching, I was fortunate enough to find another job in a similar setting to my previous job. Again, it is per diem, but I work about 2-12 hours shifts/week.
I still feel very new, (been there for 3 months) have a lot to learn and confidence to gain. Last night I had a horrible shift.
So often at the end of the shift, I feel like I don't have enough info for report and can't always answer questions from the next shift nurse in regards to patient's history, etc. I always want to read more history on my patients but time gets in my way. With 8-10 patients, a majority of my time is spent doing patient care and charting on my activities. I pass all of my meds, perform care needed, assess and chart and deal with imminent issues, but I feel like there is so much I don't get to learn about my patients in one shift.
My question (s) for any experienced nurses:
When will I start feeling better at the end of each shift? Right now I often leave feeling yucky about myself. I leave feeling like I "didn't do the best job I could".
I hate that feeling.
I hate leaving feeling like maybe I could have done more during my 12 hours. I also hate feeling like maybe the next shift's nurse thinks poorly of me. Does my confidence just need to grow? This morning I left feeling awful about myself and want to leave feeling good! Various things kept running through my brain wondering if I forgot to do something. Will this just improve with time? I am starting to feel defeated and while still new, not too new at this! (Plus I am second career nurse, so older with a previous career under my belt. Blow to the ego for sure!)
Thanks for any guidance!