2nd thoughts about being a nurse - page 2
I was so excited that after 4 grueling years of school, I got my BSN. I really thought life would be better, but it stinks. I have been working about 4 months on med/tele. I am so sick of having too... Read More
Sep 27, '06SmileySenior,
I hear you. I've been on my own for 2 weeks on a similar floor. Always have 6 patients. All very sick. Some on tele monitors, some on cardiac med drips. Just heard that our floor will be the designated floor for a certain condition. When nurses protested (how can we give the type of care required for these patients when we have 5-6 others) we were told, "oh, we thought about that. But case management is so good, they'll be out within a few days.". Yeah, right. I just d/c'd someone who had been sitting for a week waiting for placement
Then I found out that we will have INSULIN DRIPS on our floor and there is a new protocol (2 PAGES OF STANDING ORDERS) for insulin administration. Again, when nurses protested (we have too many patients to DO THIS) we are told, "well, if the hospital wants to do it, they will find the resources." Uh huh.
I already feel a bit unsafe. There were a few situations where I felt my license was at risk (being forced to accept a patient who should have been in the icu (no beds)-original order was ICU) whose insulin drip was dc'd an hour before (we don't have the drips yet) and she had a FS of over 500. Another time, a psych patient wanted to go outside to SMOKE (he was on TELEMETRY and SUICIDE PRECAUTIONS) and I was told by charge to let him go-just make sure I have a doctor's order.
WHAT????? Anyway, if you are feeling unsafe with your assignments every day (that means overwhelmed with no support also) I'd suggest another job. I wish I could try but I already switched 2x in the last 10 months because I can't work nights. I'm too afraid of looking like a job hopper. Yet, I'm afraid of this floor and what I'm expected to do.
Good luck and let us know how it turns out.
Sep 27, '06I've read alot on this board that Tele is not a great place to start anyway. Also, how many days a week do you work. Why do you not have time to rest?
Sep 28, '06Smiley, I could have written your post myself. 9 months on my current unit and I KNOW I can't go on with this gig much longer. No techs, sometimes no secretary so we answer phones and take off our own orders and on days no less at those times! We deliver and return our own trays plus are responsible for delivering meticulous patient care in an ICU environment where assisting with bedside procedures is unplanned and common. It's all too much. And in my 50's, I want to spend my remaining "young" years watching my grands grow and being part of their lives.
Where do I go from here?
Sep 28, '06Hey Smiley. I am a new grad as well. Have been off orientation a little over a month. Sometimes I feel the same as you. I also work on a med/surg tele unit. Everyone keeps saying that it takes a good year before you feel confident. That feels like such a long time. Lately I feel like I made a big mistake too. Although this is the 1st time I have admited that because of all the hard work and time I put into school. I have told myself that I need to give it a least a year before I go looking for something else related to nursing. The floor I work on we get 5 patients, so it is not unrealistic. But every time I go home from work, I worry that I made a mistake or something, I just constantly have a pit in my stomach. I hate not knowing my job well and I hate knowing that it is going to be a while before I feel comfortable. I was talking to one of the more experienced nurses the other evening after the shift was over and was telling her some of this. SHe said that it is hard because a lot of the learning comes from making mistakes or when things go wrong. That scares me so bad! Good luck to you, you are not alone, there are a lot of us out here who feel the same. I can only hope that it will get better for the both of us.
Sep 28, '06It DOES get better! My first few months as a nurse I was constantly second guessing myself, worrying that I might have missed something, ect. I was frustrated and constantly wondering why I went to school for THIS. But honestly, after the first year, it does get better. Sure, there are rough days, and there's unsafe places to work out there, but when you find the right place, doing whatever kind of nursing is best to you, it all comes together.
Get out and look to see what else is available. It doesn't hurt to check into other facilities, even if it's something you never thought you would want to do. I swore I'd never work LTC, and guess where I am? LTC LOL! And I love it.
Sep 28, '06Smileysenior,
I am going through the same dilemma as you. I worked so hard to get into a 1-yr accelerated BSN program that was over 10 states away from my home state, a really small town it was and I didn't know anybody, developed serious anxiety attacks which drove me to the ER twice at 3am while in school there, but I toughed it out and I came back home with an RN, BSN degree in May of this year. It was hard work. I started a job just 3 weeks ago and now realizing nursing might not be for me after all. I hate having to clean feces, and now I know why they say "NURSES EAT THEIR YOUNG" because they really do. I come to work having to take a peptobismol every morning. I hate coming to work and I have become this bitter, exhausted, whiney person to friends and family. The stress at work is all I ever talk about. I work on a med/oncology unit serving the veterans by the way.
I've seen some posts around here that say "get out now while you can" and I'm afraid something inside me is telling me the very same thing.
Good luck to both of us.
Sep 28, '06I am feeling a little bit of what you describe, although it has gotten somewhat better.
I approached my supervisor when I felt I was getting unsafe assignments--I had four mother/baby couplets, all surgical births, and a new admit who was also a c-sect WITH TWINS. Eleven patients!
I told her that I didn't feel it was safe for me to have more than four couplets at a time, and they have tried very hard to keep that. Although we can't control how many babies are being born, at least I know that the idea of the support is there.
I also learned that it is okay to ask for help. Even if everyone is busy. They were all new nurses once. If you feel its unsafe, don't do it. if you don't know what you are doing, don't do it.
My main problem now is the hours. I am working five 8-hour shifts a week, and they refuse to let new-grads work 12 hour shifts for 6 months to a year, apparently it increases burnout. Umm.....being there five out of seven is better???
I am going to meet with the NM soon and tell her that its not working for me and maybe try to convince her that I want 3 12's. Yes I will lose 4h/week but its worth it. Right now I work somethign like three days on, one day off, four days on, one day off and I only manage to get two days in a row off occasionally (self scheduling too!).
So I am trying to make it better. As a nurse my confidence is growing, but I am falling apart from the sheer amount of time I am spending at work.
Oct 1, '06Thanks for all the support and feedback. I work friday and saturday, getting ready to leave to work now! It has been an awful weekend and I know for sure I need another job.........and I need to think long and hard about getting another degree in nursing........I had planned on it but this is reality. I dont want to invest another 2 years of my life pursuing something I may not really want to do..........it's hard, I feel like a faliure.......
Oct 1, '06SmileySenior,
Your post could be written by me. I know exactly how you feel. All I feel right now is disillusioned with the nursing profession and mad at myself for not doing better research before I decided on this path. I too was trying hard to get that one year med-surg experience before I moved on. I found out that I was pregnant and started having problems immediately which I blame on the stress (physical and mental) of the job. I decided my health and the health of my baby is more important.
The only clinical I enjoyed during nursing school was school nursing, but I decided that experience was more important. Well, that is the last time I don't listen to my instincts! I now am about to start a position as a school nurse and am happier and more excited about nursing than I have been in a long time. Find out what makes you happy and where you belong! Don't stay somewhere you are miserable! Right now, I shudder at the thought of working any floor of any hospital. Best of luck to you!
Oct 2, '06I am having mixed feelings about my job....I am not very happy with it. Nursing isnt what I thought it was. It is stressful, demanding, long hours, grueling, little time for my family..........I am thinking of leaving nursing as a whole because of it.......some of my coworkers think that it is unwise to leave my job after 4 months and try to find another because it is "unwise" and told me that I need a year of medsurg. They say it takes a good year for a new nurse to feel comfortable and that I need to to stick it out for a year. They tell me that it is bad everywhere and I had better stay here.........they even told me I was spoiled for wanting to leave because I need to pay my dues! I was hurt. I already feel like a failure and I invested 4 years in this........I wanted to be an NP. It is very hard to deal with the reality of nursing..I was gonna try to stick it out a year or at least 6 months but I am so tired of feeling grouchy and edgy and like shyt...........I am turning into a bitter monster. I want to be happy. And the majority of people at my job are on meds for depression and anxiety.......and try to offer me some and say that I will be doped up like them in no time. I dont drink.....and they always try to pressure me to drink..........I am so sick of this shyt. I have been through alot and try to deal with my life experiences and stress in healthy ways.......baths, exercise, praying, talking, journaling, and fo course chocolate. But I am just tired of working with all these old bitter vultures who are here because they have kids and hubby and need the money........many of them dont want to be here......and I think sometimes they get a little upset because of some of us new nurses being single and childless meaning that we have the ability to up and leave one job and find another without worrying bout kids/hubby. They tell me that they worked more than me with a family and that if they can do it, so can I. I am so sick of them. I am so angry. I feel like nurses eat their young and most nurses are pissed off, stressed out, and underpaid and overworked. I would not encourage anyone to become a nurse unless the research this career thoroughly....it is not what I thought it was. I wanted to spend time with my patients, not feel rushed and crazy.......all I ever do is tasks, and get yelled at, and be stressed.........I need some hope. Sadly, I talked to my some that I graduated with and we all feel the same, frustrated and considering new careers.
Oct 2, '06SmileySenior, How many days do you work a week? How many kids do you have? And are you married?