Feeling discouraged

Nursing Students Pre-Nursing

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I have been desperately trying to finish my prerequisites and I started this path when I was 37. I am about to be 40 this coming up a month from now and whereas as most people would celebrate their day, I, on the other hand, feel somber and just disappointed in my self. I have been stuck in the same math course for almost a year, and every semester I end up dropping because the professor wasn't exactly on top of their Q and A's. I usually end up dropping the classes because of circumstances that are intolerable to the success of the student. For example, I had a professor, call out a special needs student because they were frustrated and crying, calling this student a "cry baby" and decided to laugh thinking it was hilarious, despite the dismay of the rest of us felt and expressed. This is just one instance. And I have reported her. But this is one of many " professional instructors" that I have dealt with and I have come to realize that Chaffey college, doesn't exactly have the greatest math department. I have a math professor at the moment, who didn't realize the school's course numbers and sections changed.....a year and a half ago...and that's just the tip of the ice burg. I'm deicing to drop that class as well, because he doesn't explain anything that he is doing, just writing equations on the board without saying much of anything to their students. They were late on the first day which left most of us wondering if we were in the right class ( 30 minutes late btw) and left in a hurry an hour and a half before the class ended. It left everyone confused and stunned with questions that the professor apparently didn't want to deal with. Something else was an apparent priority. I stay up most nights now until 3 in the morning with only four hours of sleep to get me onto my next day. I am trying.

I get that its the student's responsibility to understand the material, but I feel like it is also the responsibility of these professors/ instructors to lecture and teach appropriately. I did have one wonderful instructor, who was amazing, and they transferred out of Chaffey to the riverside district. Most of the Math instructors at this school are tenures, and VERY comfortable with their position, refusing to retire which would allow fresh instruction to be implemented. And the only ones that are suffering, is us. I feel so defeated and tired, very discouraged. Most of all I feel angry. Most professors at Chaffey are amazing, but their courses are not imperative to the degree I am pursuing and I am fluffing my schedule with classes I don't necessarily need right now to keep my financial aid and grants because of this Math class that is occupied by professors and instructors that need to go and be rotated.

I have tried so hard to get through the last math subject in order to finish the rest of my reqs, but I realized that I cant if I stay at Chaffey. I feel discouraged. It's going to take me yet another year! Before I am done with my prerequisites because of these math classes. I decided to transfer. I need to. By the time i have my LVN license, I will be a whopping 42 years of age... I was supposed to already be in the program and not dealing with this crud. I guess I need encouragement or something. I feel like I keep getting hit with roadblocks and I am over it. I have 4 W'S now... all in this math course. I just couldn't stand by and take the courses when certain things were happening that violated a student's rights to learn. Was I wrong for dropping out though? Even though I reported these professors?

Thank you so much for reading this. At least it's teaching me how to manage my stress more efficiently.

Specializes in Community/Public Health.
2 minutes ago, Vixyn said:

There is a huge difference between not liking a professor, and being verbally abused by one. I guess the census here is that its entirely ok for a student to be made fun of out-loud in front of the class due to their disabilities and just lay low and take a grade..seriously? Again..difference between unfair professors ( which I have had) and professors that are balantly too comfortable to treat their students like garbage.

The situation you described, where the professor made fun of the student and you reported her - that's ONE "W," which leaves three others.

You keep using that ONE instance as a strawman argument; no one is telling you to take verbal abuse. If there are other instances of professors making disabled students cry, you didn't mention them and can't expect it to weigh into any advice.

Issues of overall systemic disorganization like course numbers changing, etc. are indicative if a larger issue within the college, which brings your choices to transfer colleges or "just get the grade," as someone above said.

Ultimately it's your nursing dream and your choice. My only recommendation was to be aware of the roadblocks you're putting up for yourself.

2 minutes ago, WhaleTails said:

The situation you described, where the professor made fun of the student and you reported her - that's ONE "W," which leaves three others.

You keep using that ONE instance as a strawman argument; no one is telling you to take verbal abuse. If there are other instances of professors making disabled students cry, you didn't mention them and can't expect it to weigh into any advice.

Issues of overall systemic disorganization like course numbers changing, etc. are indicative if a larger issue within the college, which brings your choices to transfer colleges or "just get the grade," as someone above said.

Ultimately it's your nursing dream and your choice. My only recommendation was to be aware of the roadblocks you're putting up for yourself.

Yes I do, because the list is long if I decided to type out all the things I have seen in a math lecture hall. One W was because I had two deaths in the family at the same time ( again I did not want to bring it on this board). One other W was because faced cancer and was under testing for two months and I couldn't keep up with the tests and assignments emotionally and didn't wish to really mention that on this board because of how personal it is to me. I'm still going through certain things on an emotional level.

One other W was because of a similar situation with a professor who cussed down at another student.

There you go. When I saw incompetence from a professor, I dropped the class before it impacted my transcripts, but it still holds me back and this is where most of my discouragement comes from. Because I keep getting held back.

To those who will easily tell another person that they won't be able to handle a nursing program, be careful because there is no indication of what a person can or cannot handle outside of these typed words.

These conversations have been uplifting and have been really supportive. I'm going to end this conversation here.

3 hours ago, Vixyn said:

I'm ok with the material itself. However, I feel that most students don't take ratemyprofessor seriously and being in a class with a professor that deragatory and abussive, while we sit there and take it for the grade really just makes professors like that feel as though they can get away with that type of behavoir in the future, which is not ok. Hopefully someone reported him. But do you think that "sticking it out for the A" only ensured that he could do that or something worse to another class? And get away with it?

I don’t know anyone in school now that doesn’t look up a professor on ratemyprofessor.com. People in my community college Facebook group constantly reference it and talk about who to avoid. As far as my nasty English professor, he was reported by students and eventually left. My point is, you can’t let adversarially people get in the way of your own ambitions. I am not saying you shouldn’t stand up for yourself, but to put yourself in a precarious position repeatedly, but say you understand the material seems like a cop-out. The school got your money, unless you dropped the class during drop. You didn’t teach anyone a lesson. The professors got payed and the wheel keeps turning.

Specializes in Community/Public Health.
5 minutes ago, Amanda_H_W said:

My point is, you can’t let adversarially people get in the way of your own ambitions. I am not saying you shouldn’t stand up for yourself, but to put yourself in a precarious position repeatedly, but say you understand the material seems like a cop-out. The school got your money, unless you dropped the class during drop. You didn’t teach anyone a lesson. The professors got payed and the wheel keeps turning.

This exactly. You acted in solidarity with other students which is admirable but is hurting you in the end.

@Vixyn you've dealt with some heavy stuff and I'm sorry for your losses. It's good that you were empowered enough to stand up for your morals and didn't let your ambition cloud your integrity.

My ex-fiance committed suicide the same day as my sophomore semester nursing midterm exam. I know how difficult it is to deal with grief on top of other obligations.

It IS discouraging to be in the position you are now. But as the situation stands, your options are limited and it may be at the point where you need to do what's better for you long-term instead of right now.

Specializes in RN.

I feel like just about everyone I've gotten to know in my pre-nursing courses at my community college has at least a couple of "W"s unfortunately. Often it is *is* because of awful professors. Heck, my A&P I professor was fired for sexual harassment the semester I had him. It's all a hot mess, but in the end it worked out a million times better for me start over, actually learn the material well and make As. I know actual nursing school it's a different story. But in community college, many of us are older/working and in survival mode.

Currently applying to programs now too (at age 43), so we'll see! This is a tough period, though, getting through these courses with your sanity intact and not yet having much to show for it. Wishing you the best of luck.

Specializes in Mental Health.

It's entirely possibly to deal with negative things that happen without dropping the class over and over. Not sure what kind of replies you were hoping to get, but it isn't going to get any easier going forward and excuses aren't going to erase the 4 W's you have now. If you run into these types of issues you should be taking them to the proper people at the school and dealing with things instead of running away. Nurses deal with difficult people on a daily basis - just consider this practice.

Awesome. I wish I can be like you guys! Thanks for the support!

Specializes in Community/Public Health.

I genuinely don't know what you were hoping for. These are all responses from people who have finished their programs or are currently in them, who have navigated application requirements and know what a competitive application looks like.

You shot yourself in the foot, and instead of looking for a way to move forward you're angry that no one is patting you on the back for your self-sacrifice. You taught those mean professors a lesson but dropping the class, and it cost you.

I am an RN student but have a previous Bachelor's degree and my husband is an engineer. Between the 2 of us, we have faced the entire circus of issues at 4 different colleges. Deaths in the family, evil professors, one professor who was deported halfway through the term leaving the entire class in upheaval, I had a stroke while 7 months pregnant one spring semester and still made President's List after I was released from the hospital and then my dad died tragically 2 days before finals that fall semester. I say all this to say I have been in that boat, where it feels like you are drowning and more than anything you just want people on your team and to support you like they would in an ideal world.

What I have learned, though, is that the real world is NOT ideal. Doctors, patients and other nurses that we encounter will challenge and test us and not perform like we expect them to. The greater skill here is taking adversity, staring it in the face and saying " I will not let you hold me back". Some professors are jerks. My husband had one who delighted in failing students because he felt like a gatekeeper to the field. Rather than letting it get to him, it pushed my husband to pass his class and basically throw it back in the professor's face by saying "I persisted and passed. I win, not you."

Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it. The withdrawals don't punish or hurt the professor, they hurt YOU. Life can be grossly unfair and as badly as we want justice, we don't always get it on our terms. The best thing you can do is find the quickest path to ensuring your success so you don't burn your own bridge across. I wish you the best of luck!

Specializes in Community/Public Health.

@oceanicdreamer this was all beautifully said.

I feel most professors are very bad at the lecturing and you have to teach yourself and grab fellow students to help with study groups. Do you have tutors?
it’s the same in PA. but you can’t give up and let them win!

stay the course. Use your tutors on campus.

Hey can't comment on the professor issues, but wanted to encourage a little. You say you'll be 40? I'm 41 and just getting started having to retake chem this spring because I took it last so long ago it expired!! God willing I'll be 45 when I finish and from what my advisors tell me, there have been others before me that were even older and excelled. So take your anxiety about your age out of the equation. You still have many working years ahead of you!! Good luck.

PS - look at taking that math class online. There are places to get it done in as little as 8 weeks. Just check with your prospective nursing program to make sure where ever you take it will be transferable.

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