My husband is in the ICU due to complications from surgery he had recently. While he has been incapacitated, his son from another marriage (who happens to be my age) has kind of taken over decision making and finances my husband was doing so I don't have to worry so much about being out from work. Anyway, I can't take the baby on the unit so there really isn't any point in me being at the hospital.
So, this afternoon I called and asked to talk to my husband's nurse. Then, this annoyed sounding nurse answered and when I said I wanted to see how my husband was doing she said he was doing the same as when his son called the last time.
Okay..
Then she said, "is he a nurse or something? Because he was asking all these detailed questions...and if there is anything you need to know you can call and ask him. He's been calling all day."
Yes, his son happens to be an RN and a very good one. And like Pops, he has a very inquisitive and maybe too much of an enquiring mind. And I guess the alpha male deal can make him a little tiring to deal with, anyway
we decided he will handle the phone calls to the hospital and keep me posted to keep the nurses from being bombarded.
This question is for all nurses and especially ICU nurses: how many times a day is too much to call? Do you generally find it annoying when the family wants to know details? Would you rather not get phone calls at all?
Specializes in Trauma acute surgery, surgical ICU, PACU.
Ask the nurses how often to call. How often is appropriate will depend on how stable his condition is, and how the work day of the nurses is scheduled.
I hate it when family call ten times a day only to be told "he's about the same time as the last time I talked to you". Sometimes it's a "not getting it" thing, or they don't understand that "It will take him a long time to wake up (or whatever)" means days to weeks not hours.... So just ask. :)
Honestly, any time we give out detailed information over the phone aren't we in violation of HIPPA? I do try to tell family members that we will be happy to update immidiate family over the phone but to keep in mind this is ICU and all the time I'm on the phone with them, thier loved one dosen't have a nurse watching over them. This tends to limit the phone calls. I know the nurse was abrupt, and should have been more compassionate, but the problem seems to be largely with your husbands son. If he is calling often and insisting on a detailed report, especially if he is not sharing that info with you, he is disrupting your husbands care, and risking his recovery. My first concern is for my patient. You are not going to die if I hurt your feelings but your husband might if I'm called away from his care too often. I'm sure this isn't what you want. Talk to your husbands son about a calling routine. You deserve the right to get an update on your husbands condition, but his son is abusing that privilage and it is effecting you and your husbands care. Even if he reviewed every lab result, every x-ray, every med given on the hour it wouldn't make one iota of difference to your husbands recovery. Tying up a critical care nurse (or any nurse) over and over for a detailed report just to satisfy his curiosity is unconscionable.
I do not give any info other than the basic "He's stable, he had dinner, now he's resting" etc type of info over the phone. I let the caller know that it is against the law for me to give specific medical info over the phone.
Actually, it's not against the law if you have the pt's permission or you are talking to the DPOA. Your facility may have a policy against it, but the law only states that you cannot give out info without permission. Many hospitals have instituted a code system, whereby family members are given a code number specific to the pt, and if they call and give that code, the nurse can talk.
Honestly, any time we give out detailed information over the phone aren't we in violation of HIPPA?
The other thing is calling RIGHT after I've done care rounds. The parents on our unit learn pretty quickly that we do 3-hour rounds - 8, 11, 2 and 5. Do not, do not call me at 11:08! I may have 3 sets of cares to do. And don't call me at 7:35. *IF* I am lucky enough to be done with report, I will not have checked my orders, nor will I have looked at your child yet. I have nothing to tell you.
Phew. Sorry. Had both of those things happen tonight already.
Honestly, any time we give out detailed information over the phone aren't we in violation of HIPPA? I do try to tell family members that we will be happy to update immidiate family over the phone but to keep in mind this is ICU and all the time I'm on the phone with them, thier loved one dosen't have a nurse watching over them. This tends to limit the phone calls. I know the nurse was abrupt, and should have been more compassionate, but the problem seems to be largely with your husbands son. If he is calling often and insisting on a detailed report, especially if he is not sharing that info with you, he is disrupting your husbands care, and risking his recovery. My first concern is for my patient. You are not going to die if I hurt your feelings but your husband might if I'm called away from his care too often. I'm sure this isn't what you want. Talk to your husbands son about a calling routine. You deserve the right to get an update on your husbands condition, but his son is abusing that privilage and it is effecting you and your husbands care. Even if he reviewed every lab result, every x-ray, every med given on the hour it wouldn't make one iota of difference to your husbands recovery. Tying up a critical care nurse (or any nurse) over and over for a detailed report just to satisfy his curiosity is unconscionable.
I guess his son is a chip off the ol' block. Yes, my husband was teetering on the brink of death and all I wanted to know was if he was stable and was he resting. His son wanted to know about hematocrit and his collapsed lungs and the pressure being used on the machines and all this detailed stuff. I think there was only one nurse who really had an issue with it, at least, she was the only one who was vocal about it.
I do not believe it was just a curiosity for his son--he was worried about dear old Dad. And he is a very experienced critical care nurse so I guess he felt like he needed to know the information...I know that doesn't make him less annoying, it just helps me understand better why he was being such a pain in the neck.The nurses weren't the only ones who had to deal with it. He drilled me with questions about my conversations with the doctors until I wanted to scream, and of course, according to him, I didn't ask half the questions I should have asked, etc., etc. etc.....
Husband is doing better but the pain meds they gave him have turned him totally nutty; I went to see him today, he had this wild look in his eyes and was jumpy, told me he was hallucinating and the walls were closing in on him and the place was haunted. He would be fairly normal one minute then wringing his hands and crying he wanted to go home the next. The room was burning hot but he felt like he was freezing (his hands were even cold.)
When I saw him sitting there getting his sponge bath and looking like a scared vulnerable little boy...well, that was hard to take. He has always been the leader of the family, you know, makes the decisions and such. He was a hard person to get along with but he knew how to keep things together and decide (a lot of the time) what was best. Now, he is incapacitated and I've had everything dumped in my lap. I left the headlights on in the truck and the battery went dead. I don't have the strength to get the battery out to take it to be charged. My car overheated and I'm in a rental car right now.I had to send my older son to stay with his big brother out of state because I can't handle all the children without Big Daddy to keep them in line...none of this would have happened if he was here. So, our little world has been turned upside down.
I know, I know, a lot of people have to deal with life altering events, but it doesn't make it any easier when it happens to you.
Anyway, he's out of ICU. One of the nicest nurses he had while in the ICU was a male nurse (and what a cutie he was!) He didn't seem to get flustered like the female nurses, he took everything in stride. I'm not tearing down female nurses because I get more flustered than anyone, it was just my objective observation.
pebbles, BSN, RN
490 Posts
Ask the nurses how often to call. How often is appropriate will depend on how stable his condition is, and how the work day of the nurses is scheduled.
I hate it when family call ten times a day only to be told "he's about the same time as the last time I talked to you". Sometimes it's a "not getting it" thing, or they don't understand that "It will take him a long time to wake up (or whatever)" means days to weeks not hours.... So just ask. :)