Dreading work, feeling like a fake

Nurses New Nurse

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I'm posting this message because this new RN life is making me feel as though I need counseling. I passed my boards in Jan. and just got off orientation 2 weeks ago. Everyday that I go to work I dread the experience, and pray for a smooth day. So far this seems to have worked. Although the other day I forgot to give a 1700 med (working 7a-7p) and got a call from the night nurse asking if I had given. I just said that I was sorry and had totally spaced it. She said it was fine and she'd give it. Of course, I've beaten myself up since then. At times, I feel like a kid playing nurse, and am not sure that I will be able to respond appropriately in critical situations. I'm really trying to keep my confidence up, and keep telling myself that all new grads have to experience feelings like this. I thought that nursing school had gone really well for me, but now I question exactly how much I actually got out of it. I'm planning on sticking this rough time out, but need some reassurance. Thank you for all the help that everyone on the forum gives one another.

Bonnie

Specializes in Trauma, ER, ICU~CCRN,CNRN.

Gosh...I think I cried for 6 months in my first nursing job!! LOL..that was over 10 years ago...:lol2:

But a very smart charge nurse took notice and told me something I've never forgotten...It will take exactly ONE year for you to know a little bit about everything! Take it from there...

And she was sooo right!

As soon as your confidence level rises, so will you in the profession. Take it easy on yourself and take no Sh*&! from anyone either...They will try to take advantage. Speak out for yourself and your patients.

Just my 2 sense!

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One of the things I think we forget to realize sometimes is that we are human. Especially with the focus these days being on how litigious our society is. And as a new grad, you ARE going to screw up, and you ARE going to miss things. It's ok, we all do from time to time, but you have to give yourself permission to not be perfect. Learn from your mistakes and move on. And get in a routine of practicing all your patient safety stuff (checking arm bands, why are you giving this med? etc.) so that when you do miss something, hopefully it's something small. You missed giving a med? Wait till you've been out for awhile and see what gets missed! That's why this is a 24 hour a day, 365 day a year job. No one can do it alone. Keep your head up! And remember how you feel right now so that you can pass on to others that are in your position in the future that IT DOES GET BETTER!!!!

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Specializes in Med/Surge.

I relate the nursing profession to building a house like this:

Prereqs are like getting the ground leveled, concrete poured, and putting all the things in the ground like the pipes and all the wood that is going to hold your home (nursing career) together.

Nursing school is like adding the sheet rock, roof, and all the doors and stuff like that. You learn a little bit about alot of stuff like how to avoid hitting your finger with the hammer and how to operate the drill.

Your first year in nursing is like deciding what color of paint, figuring out what is going to work for you in your home to make it effecient. You may make alot of mistakes but you will be learning alot about what it takes to get your home just the way you want it but you will still have the decorators (peers) to ask questions and opinions of to feel safe to make your home better.

After the end of that period, when you start to feel more comfortable in your new home, you will be able start getting into truly decorating your home with building on what you have learned previously in the whole process. You are always going to have questions about your home but you are more able to trust what you think is the best thing to do but still have the phone number to the contractor/decorators (peers and staff) to help you through the other descions that you have to make.

I know this sounds really lame, but, it is the only thing that has gotten me through this first year so far. You will be amazed in 2-3 months how far you have come and every day that you complete you will build on the initial foundation for your nursing role. I have less than 3 months in completing that magical first year and I am amazed at how the transformation has gone. You can get through this too and all the things that you are experiencing have been experienced by all the nurses that have come before you and all the ones that will come after you. The good thing is that you have all of us at Allnurses to support you through it!!

You will do GREAT. You just gotta give it time and lots of patience/patients!!

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Specializes in Telemetry and ER.

I just have to thank you all for such great threads. I am 8 weeks into my orientation and panicking because in 4 short weeks I will be on my own. Reading your posts just makes me feel better and I am sure many others. Thank you all so much!!!!!!!!!!! :cheers:

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I just have to thank you all for such great threads. I am 8 weeks into my orientation and panicking because in 4 short weeks I will be on my own. Reading your posts just makes me feel better and I am sure many others. Thank you all so much!!!!!!!!!!! :cheers:

One thing that might help you is this. Review your MAR before you go home.

You will build confidence as you go. Don't be so hard on yourself.

One day you'll be the experienced nurse.:)

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Specializes in aged -adolescent.

I don't know if this help anyone but if it helps one person, it's not wasted right? As a student one of the things that really worried me was taking blood pressures, simple but I still worried and then one day whilst taking a blood pressure on an elderly patient with her daughter in the room, the daughter said "135 over 74". I turned and said "how did you know?" it's exactly what I had got. She said she could see on the sphygmo where it had come in and had been nursing. Just a little thing but it made my day. I worried much less after that. Now if someone can just show me how to assemble the cuffs. We get taught how to take blood pressures but precious little about the machines and how to assemble them and they are always the wrong size when you need them in a hurry. I got bawled out for not knowing that in my third year as a student. I said in defence to the NUM. "This is the first time it's happened and no we have never been taught how to disemble and assemble them". Sound familiar or am I just slow?.

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What great responses , and all so true! Timothy- I really like your answer. I think you are right. Just knowing you don't know and knowing you can find out the answer makes a difference. I am a student graduating in May. I said to my instructor last year that I felt like I was having an out of body experience, that I was playing a "role". She told me if I didn't feel that way at some point she would be concerned! This seems to be roller coaster ride, some days I feel like I will be fine and other days I think I'd better quit before I kill someone!!

I have been told by many this is all normal and that one day you will realized you are a "nurse"! It is why not everyone can do this.

Good luck to all!!

mikki

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