Dreading work. Advice?

[RNJayhawk]

I am a new grad (three months in), and absolutely dread going to work. I have a good job (pays a lot, GREAT benefits, love the patient population, long orientation, good staffing ratios), but I am absolutely, completely fed up with all of my gossipy coworkers. Despite all of the great things I listed above, this unit has an astronomically high turnover rate and a reputation throughout the hospital for being the most viscious, toughest units to work in (I didn't know this until after I started). The other nurses won't even wait until you are out of earshot before they start talking bad about you. It is almost like they delight in making people depressed. Quitting absolutely isn't a financial option for me, so I am going to have to stick it out for another year, but I really don't know how I am going to make it.

Soooo....

I have read enough posts to know that a lot of other people dread going to work for some reason (coworkers, feeling overwhelmed, bad staffing, horrible management, etc). So what do you all do when you feel this way? How do you motivate yourself to go to work, or at least make yourself feel better about having to go to work? Thanks for the advice!

[jacq2005]

Hi. I'm not a nurse (yet) but I do work full-time in a job that provides direct pt care in an environment much like you've described. When it gets to be too much, I remind myself that I took this job not to make friends but to make a difference for my patients. If you enjoy what you're doing, plz don't let these gossipy people deter you from doing what you love. Be friendly but stay out of the rumor mill! I've confronted several coworkers about issues that involved me directly, in a professional way and in private, and kindly pointed out that I would appreciate if they had a problem with me, discuss it with me as I was the only one who could solve, clarify or otherwise set straight the issue. Good luck

[Imafloat, BSN, RN]

Focus on your patients, ignore the gossip queens. If there is high turnover then there will be new people soon enough, eventually there will be enough of you that maybe things will get better.

[pagandeva2000, LPN]

Nursing can be very cut-throat and catty. If you have great benefits, pay and can handle the job, see if you can hang in there. If these nurses are very gossipy, yet also show you what to do, and are helpful (I know...hard combination), stick it out and if you don't feel safe, start looking for something else discreetly. There is no guarentee that it will be better elsewhere, unfortunately.

[sweetmuffin48]

my question is...how do these nurses have time to gossip? They should be caring for patients instead of gabbing...I know I am new but nurses have so much to do...

[november17, ASN, RN]

Do you work in a hospital? Maybe you could transfer to a different unit.

[Newandconfused]

I feel the same way you do. As a matter of fact I sit here with this stomach ache that has not gone away since I transferred into ICU. I am 10mos in to this and can not wait until my year is in so I can get away from the same type of co-workers you have and away from this facility. I went to HR yesterday and told them they need to let me transfer back to Med/Surge where I came from three months ago. (Work 6 months b/4 transfer is the rule) I came from Med/Surge which was just as bad about the gossip and backstabbing but at least I felt I knew how to take care of my pts and the problems that could come with them. ICU is totally different. Cut-Throat, backstabbing, gossip and a totally INSANE Clinical Manager. I told HR I didn't feel safe in taking these type of pt's. My orientation SUCKED to say the least. They 'promised' me they would make it better. Well here I am getting ready to go do another 3 in a row!!! '

But getting back to your question. I have decided to take it one day at a time and think of short term and long term goals as far as my personal life. If I work there another pay period I can do this.....If I work there another 2 months I can do this...... Type of stuff.

Can you transfer to another floor that might not be so bad?

[AmericanRN]

Hi

I am not in a hospital yet but (start nursing school in April) However I do work for a law enforcement agency that is full of gossip, politics, etc. It is brutal from the bottom up with a quasi military structure on top of it with 10 sets of rules depending on everything and who you know and exception to all of those rules. There are days when I wonder why half the place doesn't just end up grabbing a gun (easy access) and killing themselves or each other. That infighting is really that bad. Sounds sick but I"m serious and there are days when I am not sure who is an employee and who is the criminal with some of the behavior.

I don't mean this lightly but you have to work on taking a deep breath, ignore the gossips and not get caught up in their feeding frenzy. You have worked too hard to let it all slip away because of catty people. As someone suggested take it a few hours at a time.

See some of the good in it, like the patient who says thank you, the co worker who says let me grab that for you. There are a lot of good people probably right there but it's hard to see or hear them sometimes if we get caught up in what I refer to as "energy vampires" They will drain the life out of you if you let them. I would say transfer if you really can't take anymore, or dig in your heals and be so good with your patients that nothing else will have power over your feelings. I wouldn't suggest for you to be obnoxious or anything like that sometimes I say things to throw dramatic people off guard. Like if they are describing something how they got backstabbed by someone and they are one themselves I might say hmm "karma huh?" If they say whats that mean I'll say "what's it mean to you." Thats always a conversation stopper.

[mom2michael, MSN, RN, NP]

Wow, we must've worked together at some time!!!!

Toxic people suck the life force out of you and toxic co-workers make life miserable. It unfortunatly just takes 1 or 2 to make it seem like the entire department is that way (believe me, I know from experience).

I have a feeling (based on my own experiences) there are just 1 or 2 evil twitches causing this problem and it's not the entire staff that is this way. Try to find another co-worker or two that don't act this way and buddy up with them. If that's not possible, steer clear of the twitches. Basically that means....come to work and provide the best possible care for your patients and don't talk to anyone else unless necessary.

Once in a psych class I was told people say nasty things about others around them because they feel that way about themselves. I try to always think of that when the trolls start up at work. Somehow that always makes me feel better.

You can always call them on it....as soon as you start out the door and the twitches start up....turn back around and say....Oh was that about me??? Is there something that you feel we need to discuss because obviously you can't wait for me to leave the actual room before you start and since I'm still here and all....lets talk about it now.

Or, if you are like me, you can just quit and find a place a bit less toxic to work in. Maybe another department or another shift would help?????

Good luck!!!