Do male nurses get less abuse than females by nursing supervisors and patients ?

11:11 · Jan 20, 2005

I dont think yelling will be a problem for you least wise not from coworkers or management.

Coworkers can definetly be rude but more likely in snide ways.

As far as pts are concerned I think that women might actually have the edge as they can clamp down on a pt or visiter much the same way a mother can to child. The female nurse being stern is more acceptable to our society. My perspective and subject to objection.

Ive had two male Doctors raise their voices to me and I told them it was unacceptable. They didnt do it again. There is a female Doc where I work that wont talk to me at all. I dont know why and I havent bothered asking. She was nice to me before she had her baby.

Bottom line is most people are ok in this profession. Women are the majority. The higher up the acuity ladder you go the more assertive you'll find.

Either you have what it takes to swim with them or you dont. If youre like me it will take some adjustment-

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Kansas_RN · Jan 20, 2005

let me start by saying...(doesn't sound like a short post does it???)....that i have been a med/surg nurse for 3 1/2yrs. i am still green around the edges by some standards and experienced by others. i mainly work medical floor in an approx 50 bed hospital. i have personally never been yelled at. that doesn't mean that a dr. has not been a bit peeved at me or at least to me at times. i am lucky in that our physicians are mostly even tempered and when certain docs get pi**ed off they will calmly tell you to your face exactly what it is they would like changed. an ordinary statement in an extrodinarily demeaning tone is much more likely to upset me than a screaming doc. we have only one doc that likes to scream. he is an ortho surgeon...(i know you are all just surprised by that one. )....and when he decides to yell at me, as i'm sure it will happen i just hope i am able to keep my wits about me enough to walk away and keep my job, rather than recipricate. he doesn't yell over one particular thing....just lets er rip every once in a while on whoever is there when it all boils over. (whatever) anyway, now on to your double standard question.

we have only 2 male nurses. i don't see any favoritism, but i can tell you that patients are more likely to assume that men are docs. our new female doc has had alot of pts tell her that she is a wonderful assistant to the doc....she straightens them out very politely......but you see where i am going with this.

my problem is with our male cna's. generally the ones i have known have not liked the "working" part of having a job. now i am not generalizing. the male nurses i work with are absolutely wonderful and definitly pull their own weight. i get more upset with the way the docs treat our male cnas. they always know their names, talk sports....ask personal interest questions. now the best cnas we have on the floor have been there a year and if you talk about her by name you have to describe who she is and then the docs say something like..."oh, yeah, i think i know who you are talking about...is she an aide?" puulllleeaazzzzeeee. :uhoh3:

i had a doc, one of my favorites, come up to me and say..."what is his name again?" and let's call him ray. so after being told his name the doc goes up and says, "hey, so ray how's it going......i heard blah, blah , blah" :angryfire did i mention the pts loved ray because he sat in the rooms and talked all shift with them...and doesn't do any of his work. (he got fired) another male cna was like that too. these are docs i like and respect and i even socialize with some outside of work....but hellooooo. if that isn't a double standard what is?

i think that generally males get more initial attention, esp in nursing where there are mostly females. but i haven't found a situation where males could slack on the job more without getting called on the carpet all the same.

all you have to do is find a job you love and do it well. bi*chy pts come and go. your self respect is what you have. you can't control how other people react to you....but you can control how you use it and react in similar situations.

good luck, work hard, and have fun!

j

jacads · Jan 20, 2005

As a male nurse I do get more respect than my female counterparts maybe it's because I am 6'2" and 275lbs or the lack of emotional baggage that a lot of my female co-workers have (serious bi-polar and psych issues).

Tweety, BSN, RN · Jan 20, 2005

I've been yelled at many times by patients over a wide variety of issues. I haven't noticed if it's more or less than female nurses.

I have found on many occasions a female nurse will in report tell me what an awful mean and demanding, or needy patient they have had all day, and they are a completely different patient to me. I've always thought it was my kind, caring demeanor and effective therapeutic communication style. Never thought it was because I was a man.

I don't think one can generalize here, but it might be true in some cases, but I doubt it's widespread.

ICUsleep · Jan 20, 2005

I have noticed that some male physicians tend to speak differently ABOUT male nurses...usually with more respect. Example would be overhearing a male physician referring to a male nurse as "Mr. Jones" or "Nurse Jones"...."ask Mr. Jones", or even first name used, "ask David to do that" instead of how he refers to the female nurses as a group, i.e., "get one of the girls to do that". Whatever. :rolleyes:

I know life can be difficult for male nurses, so I'm not even going there...except to say that I have NEVER heard of a physician screaming at or throwing things at a male nurse....which is silly...'cuz chicks can knock out teeth just the same as a big guy can.:rotfl:

ICUsleep · Jan 20, 2005

As a male nurse I do get more respect than my female counterparts maybe it's because I am 6'2" and 275lbs or the lack of emotional baggage that a lot of my female co-workers have (serious bi-polar and psych issues).

Wow. A "lot" of your female co-workers have a "serious" mental illness? Did they disclose that information to you personally or is that just an assumption?

I wonder if they have been driven mad by a general lack of respect....like people assuming that they are mental.....

saskrn · Jan 20, 2005

Both DH and I are RN's, and for the most part have never been "yelled" at etc. But, we have noticed a difference in how he is treated versus females. For example, MD's rarely give him any grief over anything, nurses do not target him or include him in their gossiping/back-biting sessions and no one really crosses him. He is quite respected, and I am told he is a very good nurse (no, that's not a biased statement :) )

As far as confrontation goes, he really hasn't had any major issues. He did have one doc go postal on him once, but the MD had multiple psych diagnoses and was poorly controlled. He used to make the other nurses cry, if they pissed him off.

He has been sexually harrassed more than verbally abused.

Nitecap · Jan 20, 2005

Be assertive people. I am a male nurse and dont see much of a diff. The Rn's that get walked on are the RN's that let it happen. The work place is sometimes a very aggressive and hectic environment so sometimes you also have to be aggressive in your demeanor. I mean if the CEO or Head of CT surgery or big wig admin gives me their piece on mind then so be it, cant do much about it. But no resident, intern,fellow, RN, or even MD is going to push me around. Teach me if I am wrong, tell me what you expect, but dont disrespect cuz if you do it's coming right back at ya. After all when we walk outside the hospital we are both just regular people. Confront me outside the hospital if your so big and bad. Nurses will never get respect if they dont demand it. I mean sometime you have to suck it up and take it but those times should be few and rare.

JailRN · Jan 20, 2005

My aunt (RN) was telling me that in her experience male nurses tend to not get yelled at as often and in general receive less abuse from fellow co-workers, supervisors, and patients. I am a male and will be entering a nursing program soon so I found this interesting. I would think that a great deal of After reading some of the bullying stories/threads on here I can't imagine people getting away with some of confrontations that were shared. I've been in the military for the last six years and except for bootcamp abusive behavior of subordinates or peers is not tolerated in any form. My question is "Has anyone else witnessed this type of double-standard when it comes to abusive behavior during face-to-face interactions ?". I am not asking about overall respect but rather confrontational situations. I have never cared what somebody thought of me personally but I will not tolerate somebody yelling into my face or vocally demeaning me. I am in no way suggesting anybody is better than somebody else or that it is right, deserved or whatever. I figure a lot of it depends on the individuals, specific situations and the overall atmosphere at the workplace. Thanks for any insight that is offered.
Lance

First off, Lance, good luck with your new career--I've been an RN for 31 years with a hubby who :confused: is a student nurse, set to grad 6-05 (third career). HE says he's treated better-"you put a white, middle aged man in a lab coat and everybody assumes they're a doctor" --like it was said before, he's 6'2" and 220" and rides a Harley, so they don't mess with him--even nurses I know who shoudn't be working because they are SO mean spirited are OK with him.

kesneysmom · Jan 20, 2005

Well I think it depends on the setting some too. My husband is an RN and when he worked in ICU he never had any issues, however that might have been because there was other men around. Now he works in a specialty office with all women like 40 women and him and then the 5 docs. I feel so sorry for him at times, and others I just tell him he needs to learn to stick up for himself and over look the petty stuff. For instance he is constantly doing maintance things and moving office furniture ect. But those women nick-pick everything he does. He has a few good women friends there like 2 but, they are all so caddy about things. I dont even work there and it drives me crazy. I am a women but give me male co-workers over women anyday. He once was reprimanded for saying " you must have to be pregnant to get time off around here or have a uterus" one of the women complained. He had asked off for some vac. time 8 months in advance and was denied the time off. He said he dosent even remember saying anything like that. The women there talk awful around him. Talk about all kinds of personal things but let him say something and he gets accused of sexual discrimination or sexual harrasment. Sorry I have went off the subject a bit I guess I needed to vent. :angryfire :angryfire He and the docs get along fine and he must be a wonderful nurse because his patients love him and send him christmas cards every year even people he took care of 8 years ago.

vortex72 · Jan 20, 2005

I'll break it down simply.

When it comes to men, most male MD's see a male RN as another MAN first and an RN second. Basically, if he feels like blowing his top to a male nurse, he has to take into consideration that we can meet him out back and beat his butt to a pulp. This is a primitive assumption but rings true.

Personally, I have never been chewed out by a male MD. In fact, many of them treat me as a coworker. However, I HAVE been chewed out by a female neurosurgeon. Women are still typically undervalued even in today's modern society and I think a few of them will use even a little power to their advantage. The same phenomenon occurs with teenage girls driving more aggressively than teenage boys because in a car they can be equal and take advantage of it.