Do you have family issues in the nursing program?

missjennmb · Dec 1, 2008

you're not crazy. people don't understand how difficult nursing school is, compared to regular classes, unless they walk a mile (or atleast listen and understand when you explain the details) My family doesn't really understand, but I've told them how the statistics were from last year, and that seemed to drive it home (class started out with 16 and ended with 7 or 8 after 3 semesters)

Are you working on top of class? Is there a way that you can budget in a certain block of time for family so that they don't feel so left out? It sounds like they just really miss you. I am working part time (just cut back my hours due to school), going to nursing classes, taking my AP pre-req (they did not mention I could do it ahead of time so now I am taking it simultaneously w/ nursing classes), and I have 3 kids, one of which I homeschool, oh and a husband. So I COMPLETELY understand having trouble juggling things. Even as we speak, I am being lazy and on here when I know I need to grab a shower and start to study, lol.

What I do, is avoid chit chat at school (if we take a 15 min break I grab a drink or whatever and then read my chapter while the rest of the class smokes). In the days when class doesnt start at 8am, I study until classes start (today they start at 1pm). But I always make time for family. Its not always the time they want, but I make sure to touch base with them and just let them know how important they are to me. My kids always want more time than I give them, regardless of how much time I give them, but I do what I can.

B average is great. It means you're probably balancing things out pretty well. I couldn't get an A without sacrificing more than I'm willing to, but thats just me. Maybe just think of it as your family misses you, not that they're just being difficult. I always ask my husband for a "date" and tell him how much I miss him when I have a free evening (which is maybe once or twice a week at best). I think just the reminder that they are important too, helps.

Your sister may never understand. If she's just being mean, leave her to it. Just tell her you love her but that she is wrong. (just dont make it sound like you are 'better' or 'smarter' or anything or you're just perpetuating the drama - she may take your saying yours is tougher than hers as you putting down her education... )

anyways :) good luck. I feel your pain. Its tough to balance everything.

vashtee, RN · Dec 1, 2008

She will begin to understand more if you tell her that the fail rate is (in some schools) as much as 50% or more.

gillytook · Dec 1, 2008

I know it hurts to have those you love treat you this way. My son got so upset with my schooling, that he threw a temper fit and moved out. He has since come to realize how important an education is and becoming a nurse is to me.

All I can say is that there are certain times when you have to stick to your guns and study such as test weekends. Just remember to schedule one-on-one time with those you had to put off as soon as you can. Also try including her in your studying. Ask for her help either to quiz you or to help around your house. Making her feel needed and a part of this maybe just be what she is looking for. She probably is feeling a little shut out especially if you were close before.

I had to reschedule a trip with my son because of a test that got moved up. He was extremely upset until I got him involve in asking me NCLEX questions and quizzing me on my notes and gave him projects to prepare for the trip. I also made sure that I scheduled the trip for the next weekend. Once as he realized how much information I had to learn and that I was not cancelling, he was with the program. It did not mean that their were not future tantrums, but there was peace for a time.

picurn10 · Dec 2, 2008

nursing school is a whole different ball of wax :bugeyes: I have my degree in psychology with a minor in philosophy and even when taking a bunch of my science pre-req's NOTHING has compared to nursing school. I have tried to explain it to my family, but they just don't even get it. I'm a little sad because as a single mom I don't have anyone in my life who "gets" what a big deal this is, but I can't really expect them too when I only realized it myself shortly before starting NS.

Don't let your sister or other family get you down. This is a short season on life, and one missed party or whatever is not going to be anything in the grand scheme of things, but if you fail out of NS, that would be a HUGE deal.

whiteoleander5 · Dec 2, 2008

For the most part, I am understood by family and friends. My boyfriend understands most of the time, but not always. He is in college right now to be a phys ed teacher--- It always makes me cringe when his exams are on VOLLEYBALL POSITIONS while mine is on cardiac assessments, lol... So obviously, he doesnt have to work as hard as I do! And it certainly is a true statement that people just DONT understand what nursing school is like unless they are in it. Its not just the physical aspect of studying all the time, but it takes a mental toll on us also! It can be so draining.

It can be rough. You're not crazy though. Your sister should definately understand, at least a little bit. Don't let her make you feel guilty, but also remember.... Everything in moderation. Of course keep up the studying, but... if for one day you feel like doing something fun (to remind you that you still have a life outside of nursing school) than I think you should do it. I dont know if I should say that, because I know everyone places an emphasis on nursing school being your life which is true because i agree:mad:!... But Im just suggesting to take time for yourself every now and then if at all possible.

Best of luck to you. :heartbeat

caliotter3 · Dec 2, 2008

You shouldn't waste your time or energy getting into discussions about your need to study with your family members. If you must, go to the library or some other place to do your studying and make sure your cell phone is turned off. Failure is not an option for you and you know you will feel badly if any of this family conflict played a part in your inability to complete your program. Good luck with your studies.

silverbells_star · Dec 2, 2008

Please don't forget to take time for yourself and your family. Taking an hour to decorate for christmas isn't going to cause you to fail a test. Family and school are important, you just need to balance them both and it is hard. Try making one or two nights a week a free night, where you can do things with them.

smartin13 · Dec 2, 2008

Nursing school is difficult and we have to give up a lot. But remember to make time for yourself as well. This last weekend was my study weekend but every 20 min or so I would get up and wrap a present, or hang a decoration, or even have a chat with my parents, friends, or bf. Just remember what my clinical proff tells my class. A nurse who passes by 1 point still has the same title as the nurse who aces everything.

Good Luck!